scotty1993 Posted April 9, 2017 Posted April 9, 2017 Hey! I'm 24 and a guy. I've never had a girlfriend/boyfriend. I've always wondered about my sexual orientation though so I think that's why, but I definitely know now that I'm bisexual. I never really told/discussed it with anyone, but last September, a guy from work (also my best friend) was messaging me. I think he sort of suspected I wasn't straight, and I think he was trying to get me to admit it. He then told me he was bisexual, and that he had feelings for me. We've known each other for a long time - it wasn't like I just met him. He asked me if I'd like to go to his house. We were both a bit sort of 'confused' still what we liked/didn't like, so I agreed to it. We ended up kissing. This went on until January... about once a week, I'd go over. He said he'd always been too afraid to 'come out' to his Mum, although he said to me one day, he wanted to be in a relationship with me. However, in January, I found out he was already seeing a guy for the past year. So basically, although we weren't together, he was 'cheating' in a way. I was upset about it all. His boyfriend forgave him. He has done loads for me, and made me so much happier and confident as a person too (I don't mean seeing him), and maybe I was too nice (some say) but I forgave him too. I think it was more nothing really was going to happen between us. I didn't want to lose him as my best friend. I came out to my Mum as bisexual (just because I got upset over everything) but he still hasn't yet. But basically, we went to town last night. We didn't plan to go. We just went to the local, and then went for it. We got there quite late, so the only club still open was a LGBT club. People kept looking over at me. I was a bit drunk, and my best mate was too. He said to me (as he didn't want people going over to him) "lets pretend we're together". It worked, but it brought my feelings back. We were dancing a few times, and hugging loads and I just couldn't help it but I got turned on by it. I still have feelings for him and after everything that's happened, I don't know why. What can I do? This sounds so bad of me, but I met up with a guy on tinder (after I knew my best friend had a boyfriend already). We've met 5 or so times. We're not 'together', but we kissed a lot the last time I seen him. When I was kissing him, I just kept thinking about my best mate and how much I liked it (and preferred it) with him. What can I do? I need to move on, but my feelings are still there. I miss all the times we had. I'm an idiot I know, but I just can't help my feelings :'( Thank you and sorry for the essay but I had to explain it all! x
Knix Posted April 10, 2017 Posted April 10, 2017 I'm sorry you're going through this. Have you tried sitting down with him somewhere and telling him how you feel? If you can't keep going on with things the way they are, I would suggest that you go out on a limb and tell him everything. Tell him about how happy he makes you, and how much chemistry you feel with him. What do you have to lose if you're already suffering? Plus he may not know that you feel so strongly towards him, and it sounds like you guys have history. Good luck!
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