raditz Posted March 20, 2017 Posted March 20, 2017 so to shorten things up ill be brief because it is a long story basically i was with this person for 5 years. and then she dumped me. i moved on and apparently have paid the price for it ever since. some details include a 5 year custody battle that she draged on. could have been resolved in 15 minutes. it was all about money and not the child. she ended up spending more money on a lawyer then she got out of me. 100$ a month(maybe why shes bitter?) so in the end everythings 50/50 split even (except the 100$ i pay for no reason) all medical and activities split excetra) i could get into childsupport and how she should be paying me according to the charts. but the court house is sexist and thats another topic. anyways the real problem i have with child support is comes with it. a thin string around my neck. me and my ex have been apart for almost 7 years now. im moved on and so is she. well, or is she? its only been two years since we have finished this court battle. and yet still nothing but problems with her. she wont leave me alone! she wont leave us alone! doesnt her husband get sick of her constant pinky and the brain trying to take over my life mind set? she constantly tries to manipulate me into spending my money so that she doesnt have too ( i catch her lying saying she paid her half and gives me a full bill) when i catch her lying she makes up excuses. i made it clear that ill only communicate for our child and that is all! i asked my mom to drop off her 100$ a month for me because they live by eachother. she constantly complains that if i dont go see her and do it my self shell take me back to court. why does she want to see me so bad. she keeps saying she wants a relationship for our child. i said we can be civil but i do not want any relationship. she uses thus 100$ a month to get my attention. so ive never missed a payment or have been late. she stopped cashing the checks n has called maintenence enforcement on me. when we asked her whats her problem. she hides like a child and her excuse was that she doesnt know how to cash a check. theres alot more **** main question. why wont her parade of bull**** end. she wont go away. i dont want anything to do with her outside of our child. i dont want to talk. a relationship or to see her or anything. and she doesnt get it to eff off! whats her problem
Whodatdog Posted March 20, 2017 Posted March 20, 2017 Gawd I hate that terminology "baby momma". Guess what, dude. She is NOT an ex-baby momma. She is THE baby momma. And always will be. The baby is yours. So unfortunately you will just have to deal with it. 1
PegNosePete Posted March 20, 2017 Posted March 20, 2017 i asked my mom to drop off her 100$ a month for me because they live by eachother. she constantly complains that if i dont go see her and do it my self shell take me back to court. Wow, in these circumstances I would definitely make sure to pay by bank transfer, so there is 100% black and white proof that you're making the payments. All of this cheque stuff is just going to fall apart in court when she says you haven't been paying her and it's your word against hers.
preraph Posted March 20, 2017 Posted March 20, 2017 If you are both parenting the child at all, then you have to communicate OR ask the court to appoint a mediator to do it for you. My suggestion is you ask her to keep all contact in writing via text or email so you have a record, and that she limit the contact to the subject of the care and welfare of your child. If not, ask the court to instruct her thusly. Be sure there's money in the account the child support comes out of.
mikeylo Posted March 20, 2017 Posted March 20, 2017 doesnt her husband get sick of her constant pinky and the brain trying to take over my life mind set? There could be trouble in paradise, maybe ?
Author raditz Posted March 21, 2017 Author Posted March 21, 2017 Gawd I hate that terminology "baby momma". Guess what, dude. She is NOT an ex-baby momma. She is THE baby momma. And always will be. The baby is yours. So unfortunately you will just have to deal with it. yea. ok but still theres a line between living seprerate civil lives and having someone harass you by threats. games. and unecessary means. there is no other term for baby mamma. my kid gets stuck in the middle of her non sense. how about her dropping off my kid in winter n stripping her down to her panties at the front door. because she bought the clothes. your obviously a crazy baby mamma your self if you dont understand the term n the dark advantages that women have in the court system.
Author raditz Posted April 8, 2017 Author Posted April 8, 2017 Ive been trying to get ligit advice about dealing with my ex, childs mother We broke up about 7 years ago, and its been an on going battle. The drama coming from her is unexplainable and i dont under stand it but im pretty sure it has to do with my girlfriend. Me and my ex have a child together. Me and my new girlfriend have a baby. My ex had some mental breakdown years ago not sure what happend to her, but she left our 5 year relationship and started dating two guys at once ultimatly having a baby and getting married to one of them about 2 months after we broke up. When i moved on n met someome new, about a year after she dumped me , she snapped and took me to court, endless lies, bad mouthing , trying to keep my kid away. The usual . 5 years and we got it all on paper. Now shes trying to take me back again, she has a problem with my gf watching our kid while im at work, she is very hipocrytical when it comes to everything that she complains about. She even tries to get me to have a relationship where we can be friends or something like its really wierd. Like i made it clear to just leave me alone. The thing i dont get the most is that the first day she was with the guy she got married to, the one she left me for , she forced my kid to call him daddy, obviously to get me mad or somrthing But she has a problm with my gf helping raise our child on my week with her. If theres any women who can relate out there, can you please tell me some reasons why my ex is just pshyco. Like shes trying to have control in my home. Over me and its like shes offended by another women in my childs life. Also my ex will find anyway possible to prevent me from getting my way. Like if i want to take her for an extra day on her week or for instence i had parent teacher interviews and i booked my own day, my ex made sure to send my kid out of town so that she couldnt come. Its nonsense . Theres alot more ranting. I can do but. I think you all got the picture. Bottom line is shes making my life difficult on purpose and the reason is unknown. Advice/help please
ExpatInItaly Posted April 9, 2017 Posted April 9, 2017 You yourself said she had some type of mental breakdown a few years back. The type of behaviour she is displaying currently is just par for the course for an unstable person. If she is interfering in the well-being of your child and causing a ruckus in your home, speak to your lawyer. But I think the bigger concern is not why your ex is acting like this. I think it's why you consider this a "never-ending break-up". It's not. You two broke up years ago. Never-ending chaos, yes. But the break-up was said and done a long time ago. It's curious that you phrased the problem like this, in my opinion. It sounds to me like you might still have feelings for your ex in some way. Would you say that's accurate?
fromheart Posted April 9, 2017 Posted April 9, 2017 so to shorten things up ill be brief because it is a long story basically i was with this person for 5 years. and then she dumped me. i moved on and apparently have paid the price for it ever since. some details include a 5 year custody battle that she draged on. could have been resolved in 15 minutes. it was all about money and not the child. she ended up spending more money on a lawyer then she got out of me. 100$ a month(maybe why shes bitter?) so in the end everythings 50/50 split even (except the 100$ i pay for no reason) all medical and activities split excetra) i could get into childsupport and how she should be paying me according to the charts. but the court house is sexist and thats another topic. anyways the real problem i have with child support is comes with it. a thin string around my neck. me and my ex have been apart for almost 7 years now. im moved on and so is she. well, or is she? its only been two years since we have finished this court battle. and yet still nothing but problems with her. she wont leave me alone! she wont leave us alone! doesnt her husband get sick of her constant pinky and the brain trying to take over my life mind set? she constantly tries to manipulate me into spending my money so that she doesnt have too ( i catch her lying saying she paid her half and gives me a full bill) when i catch her lying she makes up excuses. i made it clear that ill only communicate for our child and that is all! i asked my mom to drop off her 100$ a month for me because they live by eachother. she constantly complains that if i dont go see her and do it my self shell take me back to court. why does she want to see me so bad. she keeps saying she wants a relationship for our child. i said we can be civil but i do not want any relationship. she uses thus 100$ a month to get my attention. so ive never missed a payment or have been late. she stopped cashing the checks n has called maintenence enforcement on me. when we asked her whats her problem. she hides like a child and her excuse was that she doesnt know how to cash a check. theres alot more **** main question. why wont her parade of bull**** end. she wont go away. i dont want anything to do with her outside of our child. i dont want to talk. a relationship or to see her or anything. and she doesnt get it to eff off! whats her problem She'll never stop her BS until she takes steps to sort herself out. Doesn't sound like she's doing it right now. Give the best to your baby under your terms, which I'm presuming are noble, and ignore her BS. Make it politely but firmly clear that nonsense will not be tolerated. You could do this in a formal letter, if she is being violent or threatening violence do so in a solicitors letter and report her to the police.
Stercrazy Posted April 10, 2017 Posted April 10, 2017 Wow so many layers to this onion. First I would find out if you can have the child support taken out of your paycheck before you even get it. Not sure where you're from but here in NJ you have it taken out and sent to children's services who then send it to the parent. Primarily this will prevent any issues about you paying or the need to prove it. As far as her making the kid call the step dad anything all I can say is give your child support towards whatever they want to call him. The ex will only be driving a wedge here. Legally she can take you to court for anything.... Doesn't mean she's going to win but that will be for her to deal with. All you have to do is be the best dad you can be as you see fit. That has nothing to do with your ex.... Period. She can't tell you what to do or how to do it. If she starts to rant simply hang up. She can't keep the kid from you anymore then you can from her. If conversations become negative simply hang up.
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