Too shy to solve this "problem" that is killing me

[eye of the storm]

You have met her, talked to her, smiled at her and been smiled back at. Call/text her. Do not continue to buy random works of art just to manufacture reasons to talk to her.

 

 

 

And it might be a personal pet peeve but when a man starts referring to a woman as a dime piece, to me it seems like he thinks of her as an object not a human. Start thinking of her as a person and talk to her.

 

She may be open and receptive. She may not be. But continuing to buy art will not change her mind. If she is interested, she will be interested. If she deflects you again, then she is not interested.

[avvril3000]

you know.. i hate to say this, but just coz she looks your way sometimes, doesnt not mean she is interested. she probably noticed that you're a familiar face on the bus. I HATE when random men think i'm interested just because i looked at them.

 

i would try over time to say gentle (non creepy) hellos. then maybe one day strike up a conversation with her about something casual. get her name. if she is open to talking to you, then try to aim at having a bus buddy for a while, get to know her better... who is she, what she likes, what she does. then after some time (like a couple of months) when she is comfortable, you might express that you would like to take her to a coffee place she might like, or a lunch place... and then you go from there.

[PNaw]

Again, sorry for using terms like that.

Personally I see a piece of diamond as something that wakes my inner up, and so is the case with this girl. Usually, I'm all focused on business and studies, having basically no social life and so on makes me a person with a "dark soul". Everytime I've seen her, my whole soul has shined up if this makes sense????

 

And, I also got an unfortunate update, which honestly have made me to consider suicide or something. I texted her and told her that I would love to see her again and get the painting from her. She basically said that the business will shut down and they will all have a holiday - therefore it will be impossible to see me again.

 

Now, obviously, if all the stares, smiles and flower smileys (by text when we discussed our meetings) really meant interest from her side, she would love to see me again. But unfortunately, thats not the case. And you know what? All my ambitions, which are far greater than anyone else ambitions mean nothing to me now. I haven't cried for years, and I basically cried yesterday as a baby given the fact that I had spent months visualizing me with this girl - not even having a love relationship but just having someone to talk to - and nothing came out from this.

 

I don't even know what I'm going to do now, at school/university there are only nerds - guys who play video games and girls who basically only like to talk about their horses and theatre. Now I'm even considering to stop studying given that nothing means much to me no more.

 

I still got her number and I'm praying to the gods that she'll send me a text saying that she would like to see me or at least that she would give me the painting just so I can see her beautiful face. But that will never happen.

For maybe an hour ago I texted her that I completely understood the situation and wished her all luck on whatever she wanted to do in the future. From previous experiences, I can't be a creep and text and call her even though that I'm desperate seeing her....

 

You know what the difference between this girl and previous girls are?

The fact that I really don't love her. I would love to know her first - and that was the goal with all this political bullcrap - by seeing her for a second time I would ask her for a walk or something given the nice weather.... Previously I fell in love in a girl directly without thinking even logically... I still have no idea what to do besides crying like a baby and taking long walks talking with myself in my own head... Right now, beacuse I still have feeling for her I think maybe I should try again in fall or something - no painting this time - just directly ask for a walk or something. But hey, who knows, maybe before fall comes I have shot myself..

 

The only positive thing with this hell that I'm in right now is that I'm not that afraid smiling or approaching someone - but now no girl (other than her) and nothing, BASICALLY NOOOTHING means that much for me. I have been out with a couple of old friends since I got this text and sure that might temporary make me think of something else. But the dreams I used to have, her beauty and everything else about her comes up in my head all the time..

 

That's the case right now too, when I write this, it feels good sharing my feelings with you. But when I click on the "Submit Reply" button I get the urge to cry and kill myself.

 

What should I even do by now? You have tried to help me all this time.. Should I maybe send a message now and just ask for a walk even though she didn't/could't/maybe didn't want to meet me again? The fact that I said that I would love to see her again and that I complimented her when I saw her for the first time probably made her know that I like her. My head is spinning, maybe I try to find solution to a problem that is not solvable. She may not be interested, but nowadays there are threads online that suggests that girls like guys who wants to make another try or that they play hard. Or maybe I should let her rest for a couple of weeks and then text her? Or maybe I should jest let her go like I basically have done with every girl I have found interesting in my life.

Edited June 18, 2017 by PNaw