JS17 Posted July 28, 2005 Posted July 28, 2005 uh oh. one of my guy friends told me last night that he thought i had become bitter about men and should be more optimistic. i see his point but what can you do to make yourself less bitter?
Marshbear Posted July 28, 2005 Posted July 28, 2005 My ex is very bitter about men and still is. She told a friend that she wants nothing to do with men in any way, shape or form. If you find out the answer let me know so I can pass it on to her. I'd like to help her if I can but she doesn't talk to me...
A Fly onThe Wall Posted July 28, 2005 Posted July 28, 2005 Originally posted by Marshbear My ex is very bitter about men and still is. She told a friend that she wants nothing to do with men in any way, shape or form. Damn Marshbear what did you do to her ??
AndrewJ Posted July 28, 2005 Posted July 28, 2005 dont associate with people who will make u feel bitter perhaps.
Author JS17 Posted July 28, 2005 Author Posted July 28, 2005 Originally posted by A Fly onThe Wall Damn Marshbear what did you do to her ?? did you chase her around with a strap on?
alphamale Posted July 28, 2005 Posted July 28, 2005 Originally posted by JS17 uh oh. one of my guy friends told me last night that he thought i had become bitter about men and should be more optimistic. i see his point but what can you do to make yourself less bitter? go lesbian
Marshbear Posted July 28, 2005 Posted July 28, 2005 Originally posted by A Fly onThe Wall Damn Marshbear what did you do to her ?? I wanted to move forward with our relationship and she has some HUGE baggage from men in the past. She does not want a serious, comitted relationship and I did. Not speaking to me is her way of control. I ended it because I loved her to much to be able to continue status quo.
Marshbear Posted July 28, 2005 Posted July 28, 2005 Originally posted by JS17 did you chase her around with a strap on? With her, I might have let her strap me....
alphamale Posted July 28, 2005 Posted July 28, 2005 Originally posted by Marshbear She does not want a serious, comitted relationship and I did. Not speaking to me is her way of control. I ended it because I loved her to much to be able to continue status quo. Actually MB, she ended it cause she did not want to move fwd and you did. As a man in a relationship with any female YOU should always be playing hard to get and telling HER that YOU don't want a serious relationship or heavy duty commitment. That is what keeps women around for the long-term.
Author JS17 Posted July 28, 2005 Author Posted July 28, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale go lesbian how did i know i was going to get that response from you? i don't think i'm at that point yet but if i get there, i'll let you know. Originally posted by Marshbear I ended it because I loved her to much to be able to continue status quo. very sweet ok, none of this is helping me to become un-bitter
Marshbear Posted July 28, 2005 Posted July 28, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale Actually MB, she ended it cause she did not want to move fwd and you did. As a man in a relationship with any female YOU should always be playing hard to get and telling HER that YOU don't want a serious relationship or heavy duty commitment. That is what keeps women around for the long-term. Your right. Alpha. I did get caught up in her and she knew it. Will never happen again ( hopefully )..
GL 44 Posted July 28, 2005 Posted July 28, 2005 Originally posted by alphamale Actually MB, she ended it cause she did not want to move fwd and you did. As a man in a relationship with any female YOU should always be playing hard to get and telling HER that YOU don't want a serious relationship or heavy duty commitment. That is what keeps women around for the long-term. This applies even when you have had a commitment. My ex fiance grew distant because I supplicated to her. Put her on a pedestal and turned into the worst kind of"nice guy". Needy, lost my own identity somewhere. Tried buying her affection with gifts, etc. Told her I loved her too often to the point it cheapened the sincerity of it. God I don't know what happened to me. The first year I was confident, took charge and basically acted like she should be honored to be with a man like me. Things went south when I morphed into a subservient wuss. I pray I will never again allow my dignity and self respect to deteriorate over any woman. It's fatal if not caught in time. It's too late for any mending with my ex. She tried coming back but I increased the bad traits because I could sense she was pushing further away. I was my own worst enemy. But on the positive side it's a lesson that is well taken. Never again supplicate to any woman. You'll go down in flames sooner or later.
Polyana Posted July 31, 2005 Posted July 31, 2005 Originally posted by JS17 uh oh. one of my guy friends told me last night that he thought i had become bitter about men and should be more optimistic. i see his point but what can you do to make yourself less bitter? JS, Sorry the posts seemed to diverge into a topic that isn't about you, so I'll try to turn the flashlight back to you. I haven't read anything about your past, but the bitterness happens to us all when we lose something or someone. It's fine to feel have that sour taste for a while. But...the problem is when it crystallises and becomes a part of you, manifesting itself in negtaivity, skeptisicm of every nice person or move they make, disbelief of nice words from people..especially the opp. sex. Things like that...you know what I mean anyway. So, as always, we need to pay some attention to what friends notice. And as always, we need to look at how we behave, what kind of comments we are passing, what kind of expectations we are setting for ourselves and from ourselves. If you find that you're always saying pessimistic things, always expecting someone to screw you up, always being on the defensive...check yourself out a bit. Look back to see what it is that made you get to that stage. And when you;ve found that, then sort it out. But that's a different stage. P.
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