How soon after an affair is someone ready to read everything here

[lookingforanswer]

After the discovery of an affair, how soon are the affected partners ready to get on this site and start reading and maybe telling their story? And get some support and opinions?

 

I'm asking those who have been cheated on. Did you need some time with a therapist first, or were you able to just jump on? I don't know if I should tell my friend now, or wait a few weeks.

 

Thank you

Edited April 4, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Merge and move to GRD

[aileD]

I think it's good to jump on now. The best advice you get in life is from people who've already been through the thing you want advice on.

[dichotomy]

Right away

[elaine567]

As you are obviously "looking for an answer" then what is your real question?

[lookingforanswer]

Got my answer, going to tell my friend to look at this website

[Marc878]

Immediately. Most are not equipped to deal with infidelity or know much about what and what not to do.

[road]

At firs the BS needs a safe place and should not tell their

WS about this place. Once the affair is over and recovery

is the goal then the WS should be encouraged to come

for support as well.

 

 

Though it is strongly advised that the BS and the WS stay

off each others threads for few months.

[Redhead14]

After the discovery of an affair, how soon are the affected partners ready to get on this site and start reading and maybe telling their story? And get some support and opinions?

 

I'm asking those who have been cheated on. Did you need some time with a therapist first, or were you able to just jump on? I don't know if I should tell my friend now, or wait a few weeks.

 

Thank you

 

The sooner you start processing and talking about it the sooner you will get to the point of ACCEPTANCE and be able to move forward with your life. If you let things build up and fester internally, all that negativity and confusion will come out in very unhealthy ways and in ways you don't even realize.

 

I think these boards are a good place to start . . . kinda like journaling. But, if you can, I'd supplement it by talking out loud to a therapist or very close friend -- but it needs to be a friend who actually has their own life together and has good insight and life experience . . .

[wmacbride]

I depends.

 

Forums can be great, but keep in mind that you will get a lot of responses, some of which help, some will be neutral, and some will be very painful.

 

Also, everyone on here is an "armchair quarterback" so to speak. We all have our experiences, but not all responses will be helpful or appropriate.

 

One more thing. If someone is in crisis, if they are feeling like they are going to hurt themselves or someone else, if they are showing signs of a mental illness or if they feel "stuck" in their pain and it's having a negative impact on other area of their life, then they shoudl see face to face, professional help.

[DrReplyInRhymes]

If I got cheated on, I'd be angry for a few days, probably drink or go out a bunch, and then eventually move on. If she told me about it, I'd respect and appreciate her enough for at least telling me. Maybe even still have a friendship, but moving on nonetheless in terms of romance.

 

I peruse loveshack out of boredom and getting a kick at some of the asinine and satirical content. It's almost as much fun as reddit.com/r/justiceporn!

 

As for when people would post on the website, well, let's say probably within a year to answer your question.