Should i text my ex bf or not? and what do you think about him?

[sarah27]

So my ex and i were together for 1.5 month, suddenly out of the blue he broke up with me (3 weeks ago) i was so confused, we had so much fun together before the breakup. I really didn't notice anything, 2 days before the breakup (last time we were together) he said that he is really happy with me, love me and That i mean everthing to him..

 

His reasons of breaking up:

- he thinks it's better if i meet someone with the same age (i am 18), (and he with his age) (he is 21)

- he felt like he was in a relationship when he was 15 year old. he told me honestly that he couldn't adjust with the situation and that he knows that he is an ego, he couldn't help himself for being like that and that he is sorry.

* not because i am immature but because this is my first relationship and everything is new for me, so i do everything very carefully and slow (incl sex u know)

- he thinks if i had relationship before that maybe it would went different

- he told me that he felt that i am not the one..

 

I didn't understand, i couldn't accept the fact that he made me feel that he really liked me and then he just left like it was nothing

We agree to each other that we will stay friends and he said perharps we can go to the movie together, but so far, we haven't spoken to each other since the breakup (3 weeks ago). I really want to text him and ask him how he is doing.. i just want to know if his feelings are really gone, and how he feels.

To be honest i just hope he regrets for breaking up with me, i really miss him..

Should i text him? (dw i wont begging to take me back or do something desperate, just want to keep it friendly) What do you guys think what i should do? And what do you think of him? Pls don't be mean i am just a girl who is really broken and need advice

 

PS. when he broke up with me, i didn't cry, i didn't show my emotions, but when i got home and after the break up the only thing i did was crying and all i did was talking about him with my friends (ofc he didn't know about this) , i don't think that he knows that i am really sad and broken, because on snapchat i only show the happy me, going out, laughing with my friends, do nice things etc. is this a good thing what i do? i mean i am afraid that he would think that i don't care about the breakup.. and that i already have moved on (which is totally not the case)

[ExpatInItaly]

I'm sorry you're so hurt, OP. First break-ups are always hard.

 

No, I wouldn't text him. He was trying to let you down "gently" with his reasons, and all you can do is believe that he doesn't have the right feelings to take this further. I know it won't seem like it now, but it's good this only lasted 1.5 months. He did the right thing by ending it if he knew he couldn't see it lasting. And if you haven't heard anything in the last three weeks, then I'd say he's not had a change of heart, unfortunately.

 

I don't think he's awful but he is a 21-year-old man, meaning, he wants more action. It's perfectly okay if you felt you wanted to take things more slowly, by the way. He's just evidently not the right guy for you in that regard.

 

Honestly, and this is coming from a woman who's dumped a couple guys in her day - he likely won't be paying a lot of attention to what you post online. Not in the way you'd hope, anyway. I don't say that to be harsh but to point out that if he had the same level of interest in you, he'd still be with you. So it won't matter too much if he sees you moving on; he was already checked out enough to end it so what he probably feels is a little relief that you're still out and doing your thing. I know it's tempting to try to keep up the appearance that you're fine without seeming like you don't care about the breakup, but that's usually just not where the dumper's mind is at.

 

But you are definitely doing the right thing by going out with your friends and trying to have a good time. That is so important, for you. Talk with your girlfriends about him until you're blue in the face. That's what they're there for! You will feel better soon, girl.

[d0nnivain]

Don't text him. You have now been apart half as long as you were together. There was no foundation.

 

 

You are also at different life stages. He was actually being a good guy when he suggested you need a BF at your stage -- young & inexperienced. (that's not a crack against you; it's just where everybody starts) He is at a different point. He probably thinks you are a cool person but he wants somebody more "his speed." By the time you get to be his age you will probably have passed him by emotionally.

 

 

As much as it hurts now, someday it will all just be a memory. For now, it's OK to grieve but you have to pick yourself up, dust yourself off & move forward in life.

[preraph]

I agree with Donnivain above. You're simply at different stages of life. If you just leave it alone now and keep your dignity intact, you'll be happier with yourself than if you compromise yourself to beg him to stay or insist on confronting him and then you'll leave mad. Just keep your dignity and walk away. You have your whole life ahead of you and you will date many other guys. Dating is not a marriage proposal or commitment. It is to find out if you are right for each other. He decided you aren't. I'm sorry. It stings, but you are too young and have too many opportunities to let this slow you down.

 

Remember: Living well is the best revenge! Go live and have fun.