elaine567 Posted April 20, 2017 Posted April 20, 2017 I think ghosting should be reserved for men that you are actually scared to confront, everyone else needs talked to, to let them know where they stand. Its the decent thing to do. 2
Author lawgirl79 Posted April 20, 2017 Author Posted April 20, 2017 I did tell him and I left the door open for him to approach me if he ever comes across free time. I did like him but I am not going to be put on the back burner. 2
smackie9 Posted April 20, 2017 Posted April 20, 2017 This guy doesn't even deserve your attention.....seriously close that door. 1
KBarletta Posted April 20, 2017 Posted April 20, 2017 (edited) Sorry. I meant to post this on the thread a while ago and it just got posted today. I agree with the other posters that it's time to move on. Edited April 20, 2017 by KBarletta 1
preraph Posted April 20, 2017 Posted April 20, 2017 On another note, I work at a law office and usually wear dresses with suit jackets. Should I wear something less "sexy" like a pants suit. I dont want him to just say he is not looking to "hook up" and then I dress too sexy to give the impression that is what I am looking for. Don't dress overly sexy. As a band guy, he has a surplus of this just in his fans. If he liked you how you look in whatever photos you exchanged and how you showed up the first time you met, do not radically change that. You can go down a step and be more casual, but do not try to dress like you may imagine he is more used to. Chances are he likes that you are a little different. Stay classy. Also, don't show a bunch of boob or anything around his band guys. In general, band guys have some conflicts over women and you don't want him to worry about that.
d0nnivain Posted April 20, 2017 Posted April 20, 2017 I'm glad you were upfront & spoke to him. That was the classy thing to do. On to bigger & better things. Best wishes 3
Author lawgirl79 Posted May 11, 2017 Author Posted May 11, 2017 Specifics which some of you know about: I have been seeing this guy for about 2 months now, we talk/text on a regular basis and see each other at least once a week, go on dates, etc. We cuddle, he is very affectionate, kisses me, we make out to the point where it gets hot and heavy, but we never have sex. When it gets to that point he gets up and walks off, not saying anything other than when can you spend the night. In the beginning when we met he said he was not looking for a hook up and was looking for a relationship. I have never been in his bedroom either which strikes me as odd. Now the update, we have made arrangements twice to spend the night but each time he has come up with a reason why I cant stay the night and then I end up going to his place the next day. The last time his kid was injured and he was at the hospital, he updated me every hour to see if there was a chance that I could come over. The last update I received from him was at midnight until I just told him I was going to bed. I ended up falling asleep and agreed to see him the next day. I am really starting to think that maybe he has a sexually transmitted disease and does not know how to tell me. I could be reading too much into this but he coughs alot (it could be allergies). He did say something early on about having a really bad upper respiratory infection where he had to go to the hospital because he was unable to breath and something about going to a doctor for some health issues but we did not discuss what they were-were were on the subject about me having diabetes. I feel like something is going on.
Author lawgirl79 Posted May 11, 2017 Author Posted May 11, 2017 (edited) I dont think age should matter. I mean I guess if he has ED. Edited May 11, 2017 by lawgirl79
Miss Spider Posted May 11, 2017 Posted May 11, 2017 You're saying it's two different guys that you've been seeing a little over 2 mo that stop and walk away abruptly before things get too 'physical' ?
Gaeta Posted May 11, 2017 Posted May 11, 2017 I dont think age should matter. I mean I guess if he has ED. It could be a series of reasons without it being an STI. I am thinking like ED, or he's embarrassed by his size, he may suffer from the prostate and right now it's not a good moment to get intimate. You just don't know and you jumping to conclusion isn't fair. Ask him straight out why you have not been intimate yet, I think that's what I suggested you last time as well. And I am repeating myself but it happened to me once and when I asked the man if something was the matter we had not been intimate in 2-3 months dating he said he is just slow in that department and with his last girlfriend he waited 5 months. Problem solved.
preraph Posted May 11, 2017 Posted May 11, 2017 Hate to get too graphic, but you've made out a lot, so I assume you know he has no problem getting an erection? Could be he has herpes and has to tell you but waits until you're going to have sex and then chickens out. It's unlikely his cough at his age means anything about an STD. I mean, if he had AIDS that was runnning him down causing problems, his general health would be shakey and he'd be taking lots of pills. It's possible he has some sexual dysfunction in the middle ground, you know, early ejaculator or sometimes loses it in the middle. Any type of unreliable erection issues will make a guy afraid to have sex and want to really trust the woman first. I'm assuming you've touched him down there during makeout sessions. But if not, you should investigate. Maybe he's weird shaped or small and is self-conscious about it. So if you haven't gone that far yet but you do heavy petting, then do it and just eliminate that possible issue. Sorry to get so personal, but it's one easy thing to check out. You might not even have to touch him to figure it out if he's aroused. Just saying.
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