mar96 Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 I find myself primarily more attracted to women of certain races(like Indian, Latina, Asian,etc) but where I live, there are barely any of those girls. Would I be settling if I diversify my dating pool? Or should I just wait until I come across one of these women even if the odds are low of that ever happening? 1
Tressugar Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 How would you be settling if you broaden your selection? Please advise. 2
Author mar96 Posted April 2, 2017 Author Posted April 2, 2017 (edited) How would you be settling if you broaden your selection? Please advise. I am more attracted to women of certain races I am not racist at all and its just my opinion. I find women of all races beautiful I'm just more attracted to others. I ask would it be settling since I would not be with someone I am ultimately attracted to. I apologize if the way I worded it sounded bad. Its not what I meant. Edited April 2, 2017 by mar96
Ieris Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 There's nothing with having preferences, but if there isn't many in your area then you can either change your location or broaden your selection. I have dated people I would usually say no to but they actually turned out really well so I say be open minded and not rule people out completely. 3
Author mar96 Posted April 2, 2017 Author Posted April 2, 2017 There's nothing with having preferences, but if there isn't many in your area then you can either change your location or broaden your selection. I have dated people I would usually say no to but they actually turned out really well so I say be open minded and not rule people out completely. I am joining the Air Force soon and I was in a dilemma situation. The jobs I want in the USAF do very little to no travelling and the job is only stationed in at very few locations that is nowhere near where I will be around these people. So, should I choose a job just to be located places where I will be most likely around these women or should I go along with the jobs I've thought of choosing before? I know I should choose a job I am interested in, but I don't plan to make the Air Force a long term career. I'm actually planning on going into the airlines afterward.
central Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 As long as you are happy with the person you end up dating, and do not feel any disappointment because she's not your preferred ethnicity. However, if you treat her any differently because of this, or love her less, then you should not date her, and are doing her and yourself a disservice. It would be settling, in a bad way, versus compromising, which is probably fine. 2
EmilyJane Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 I would suggest that instead making descions based on career of finding women of certain ethnicities more physically and superficially appealing in your mind you open youtself up to getting to know and appreciate the women you meet as individuals rather than as a physical type which is borderline offensive. 1
Author mar96 Posted April 2, 2017 Author Posted April 2, 2017 I would suggest that instead making descions based on career of finding women of certain ethnicities more physically and superficially appealing in your mind you open youtself up to getting to know and appreciate the women you meet as individuals rather than as a physical type which is borderline offensive. How is that borderline offensive? I am not racist and its a personal preference. 2
OatsAndHall Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 The simple answer is yes. You would have more luck dating if you expanded your preferences. You've stated that you are attracted to women of ethnicity that fall outside of your preference so the math is simple: more potential women equates to more dates.
EmilyJane Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 (edited) How is that borderline offensive? I am not racist and its a personal preference. It's borderline offensive to women. Because you are literally only talking about women by classified physical appearance. And your problem of not meeting women you like might well be solved by viewing the ones you meet as individuals that you get to appreciate as people. Rather than narrowing them down by physical "type" first and personality second. Like.., maybe think about developing personal preferences for smart funny ones you enjoy sornding time with...attraction grows also from positive social interaction Edited April 2, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 1
SevenCity Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 It's borderline offensive to women you fool. Because you are literally only talking about women by classified physical appearance. And your problem of not meeting women you like might well be solved by viewing the ones you meet as individuals that you get to appreciate as people. Rather than narrowing them down by physical "type" first and personality second. Like.., maybe think about developing personal preferences for smart funny ones you enjoy sornding time with...attraction grows also from positive social interaction Just because people are attracted to a certain look does not make him a racist or superficial. This is what people do - they are attracted to someone first and then see if the personality is good. Do you date guys you don't find attractive? 7
Author mar96 Posted April 2, 2017 Author Posted April 2, 2017 As long as you are happy with the person you end up dating, and do not feel any disappointment because she's not your preferred ethnicity. However, if you treat her any differently because of this, or love her less, then you should not date her, and are doing her and yourself a disservice. It would be settling, in a bad way, versus compromising, which is probably fine. I feel that I would be a little disappointed if she wasn't my preferred ethnicity. However, I still would be able to date her and will not treat her differently or love her less. I feel I would have to get over how I preferred her to look later. I feel like it would kind of be between settling in a bad way and compromising or maybe both.
Joga_31 Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 I find myself primarily more attracted to women of certain races(like Indian, Latina, Asian,etc) but where I live, there are barely any of those girls. Would I be settling if I diversify my dating pool? Or should I just wait until I come across one of these women even if the odds are low of that ever happening? come to canada, we have lots of asian here. Im currently thinking about breaking up with one
Author mar96 Posted April 2, 2017 Author Posted April 2, 2017 Just because people are attracted to a certain look does not make him a racist or superficial. This is what people do - they are attracted to someone first and then see if the personality is good. Do you date guys you don't find attractive? She is acting as though women don't do the same especially in their teens.
Author mar96 Posted April 2, 2017 Author Posted April 2, 2017 It's borderline offensive to women you fool. Because you are literally only talking about women by classified physical appearance. And your problem of not meeting women you like might well be solved by viewing the ones you meet as individuals that you get to appreciate as people. Rather than narrowing them down by physical "type" first and personality second. Like.., maybe think about developing personal preferences for smart funny ones you enjoy sornding time with...attraction grows also from positive social interaction And women don't do the same?
Miss Spider Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 You really can't help the physical stuff you're attracted to. It starts very early, maybe even genetic. Does that limit your dating options? Oh yes. There's also the ability to overlook it to an extent once you find someone you really click with. Don't discount that, to whatever extent it's possible for you. 4
Gr8fuln2020 Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 I find myself primarily more attracted to women of certain races(like Indian, Latina, Asian,etc) but where I live, there are barely any of those girls. Would I be settling if I diversify my dating pool? Or should I just wait until I come across one of these women even if the odds are low of that ever happening? Of course a big part of the reason why you are single is b/c you have such preferences in a location where there are so few of such ladies. If you are bent on finding such ladies, then wait and persist or go someplace where there are more of such ladies. There are beautiful women in all the ethnic groups, it's not your preference, it's LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION. 2
Author mar96 Posted April 2, 2017 Author Posted April 2, 2017 Of course a big part of the reason why you are single is b/c you have such preferences in a location where there are so few of such ladies. If you are bent on finding such ladies, then wait and persist or go someplace where there are more of such ladies. There are beautiful women in all the ethnic groups, it's not your preference, it's LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION. So should I choose a job in the Air Force that is stationed in those locations or should I choose a job I am interested in that is stationed elsewhere? Its like a dilemma because I am planning my future.
Gr8fuln2020 Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 So should I choose a job in the Air Force that is stationed in those locations or should I choose a job I am interested in that is stationed elsewhere? Its like a dilemma because I am planning my future. Truthfully, I would seek a job I enjoy that takes me to places where there are more women of your preference. Hard to say. Advantages to joining the AF, but is that what you want to do? Join the AF?
smackie9 Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 I would just move....you would be most certainly happier being at a location loaded with diversity, and I don't think you will ever regret it. There are opportunities everywhere. Time to think outside the box.
Ami1uwant Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 I am joining the Air Force soon and I was in a dilemma situation. The jobs I want in the USAF do very little to no travelling and the job is only stationed in at very few locations that is nowhere near where I will be around these people. So, should I choose a job just to be located places where I will be most likely around these women or should I go along with the jobs I've thought of choosing before? I know I should choose a job I am interested in, but I don't plan to make the Air Force a long term career. I'm actually planning on going into the airlines afterward. How sure are you about this theory you wont have women of these races there??? Sure these places could be so remote there are no women available to date
TheBathWater Posted April 2, 2017 Posted April 2, 2017 (edited) I find myself primarily more attracted to women of certain races(like Indian, Latina, Asian,etc) but where I live, there are barely any of those girls. Would I be settling if I diversify my dating pool? Or should I just wait until I come across one of these women even if the odds are low of that ever happening? Why not put yourself into closer contact with the women you are attracted to? Is there a Chinatown neighborhood where you live? Is there a latin dance community? Indian grocery stores and restaurants? You get the point. If you don't live in a city where these communities are an option, would you consider relocating to one where the options are there? In any case, whatever type of women you are attracted to, they are rarely or never going to come to you. You have to be the one to find and attract them. I suspect that you would date a white woman if it was the right woman. I'm white, and probably 75% of the women I date are East Asian. I am not opposed to dating white women, but I find that when it come to values and personality, I'm a more 'natural' fit with East Asian women and multicultural women in general. When I date and feel connected to white women, it's often because they share some of those personal values too. Edited April 2, 2017 by TunaInTheBrine
Author mar96 Posted April 3, 2017 Author Posted April 3, 2017 I would just move....you would be most certainly happier being at a location loaded with diversity, and I don't think you will ever regret it. There are opportunities everywhere. Time to think outside the box. Despite it being a job you have little to no interest in?
Author mar96 Posted April 3, 2017 Author Posted April 3, 2017 Truthfully, I would seek a job I enjoy that takes me to places where there are more women of your preference. Hard to say. Advantages to joining the AF, but is that what you want to do? Join the AF? Even if you don't like the job despite it being stationed at said location? The jobs I like most stay in one state(bomber mechanic I think, they work on B2s and are only stationed at 1 base, which is in North Dakota I think). Any other Air Force jobs I have interest in. So its either have a job that I like and never work a day in my life but not have these women available or either have a job I don't really like but be surrounded by these women.
Author mar96 Posted April 3, 2017 Author Posted April 3, 2017 Why not put yourself into closer contact with the women you are attracted to? Is there a Chinatown neighborhood where you live? Is there a latin dance community? Indian grocery stores and restaurants? You get the point. If you don't live in a city where these communities are an option, would you consider relocating to one where the options are there? In any case, whatever type of women you are attracted to, they are rarely or never going to come to you. You have to be the one to find and attract them. I suspect that you would date a white woman if it was the right woman. I'm white, and probably 75% of the women I date are East Asian. I am not opposed to dating white women, but I find that when it come to values and personality, I'm a more 'natural' fit with East Asian women and multicultural women in general. When I date and feel connected to white women, it's often because they share some of those personal values too. Because the Air Force jobs that I want are only based in the United States. Most guys with those jobs only stay in one state which I think is in North Dakota throughout their whole career. The only way I can move myself to where those women are, I would have to get a job I have very little interest in. Its a situation where its have a job I am into and never work a day in my life but not have these women available or have a job a have no interest in but be surrounded by the women I prefer. I don't know what to do.
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