Author centered Posted July 28, 2005 Author Posted July 28, 2005 Thank you, all. This helps. I guess because of the length of time he was married, and his lack of experience in breaking up, I can expect a longer healing time. That's what I needed to know. Merin's story gives me the most hope, I think, because I can see him doing and saying the same types of things Anyway, back to work, then gotta get ready for our date tonight: I'm helping him fix up his house for a big party this weekend! Nothing like sharing chores to fan the flames of romance!
Merin Posted July 29, 2005 Posted July 29, 2005 Originally posted by clynn ha ha ha ha ha ha hah!!!!! Actually, I think that Merin is the smart woman, at least when it comes to dealing with men!! ha ha ha, good on you Merin. i love the, okay but how about the movie? Okay, pass the salsa.... Men are sooooo funny.. Remember, they usually do things that scare themselves! Its so funny! LOL Couldn't agree more.. My Boyfriend does things that freaks him out.. LOL I just let him go have his moment of wiggin and trust he'll shake it off and be okay. This has been practice for me though.. LOL I am usually the person who MUST have the 411.. they how come(s) of it all.. but I am learning with him that he can't deal with it.. so I've learned to make things non-issues.. give him time to think about things and come to his own conclusions.. so far, so good *damn it knock on wood* Originally posted by centered Merin's story gives me the most hope, I think, because I can see him doing and saying the same types of things Trust me when I say our relationship hasn't been a storybook.. well unless you could helter skelter as one? We have had good things, bad things, ugly things.. and for real a lot of stupid things! LOL BUT I do Love my Boyfriend like mad, crazy and I know he Loves me... it took him some time to come to terms with that.. we do not choose who is going to blow us away or inspire us.. and when it happens it can be scary especially when you've been hurt (but for real who hasn't?) My BF and I broke up for about 3 weeks at one point.. he was running from what he was feeling and even though it hurt so much and I hated it a lot... it was probably the best thing that happend because he discovered that no matter how far or how fast he ran, he still loved me and missed me like mad... I wish you the best Centered
Author centered Posted July 29, 2005 Author Posted July 29, 2005 Thanks, Merin, CLynn! I guess actions are always more important than words. He's so sweet, and he always pays attention to the little things. Like I mentioned the other day when he drives my car, he pulls the hand brake so hard I have a hard time releasing it when I drive the car after him. So right after I mentioned that, he takes care to only pull it the same number of clicks I do. Lots of things like that. He's so sweet and thoughtful! I've never had a guy actually pay attention to the little things like that and follow through on them. So, yeah, I think he's really feeling something for me. It hasn't all been rosey, though, and we've had a few bumps and setbacks. But we seem to build a stronger relationship after getting past the setbacks, and we're super good at talking about what bugs us and figuring out how to reach a good place together. He may actually be "The One." Wow. I had pretty much given up on ever finding a guy I was this happy with. His house is a mess and a disaster, but he enjoys working on projects together to make it better. He tends to be a slob at home, but if I find places for things, he puts them back. He just needs help organizing things, and he doesn't seem to mind the help when I offer it, so I think I can deal with that aspect. The biggest challenge to the relationship will be his daughter. She's 13 and is a typical teenager. She wasn't at all happy about her parents divorcing, and she resented my presence (at first) as anything more than a friend. But we're slowly learning how to be friends and get past the prickly feelings. She can still be rude, but I know that comes from her conflicting emotions about the impending divorce. Her mom is very supportive of me being in her dad's life, and I never try to intrude on daughter/dad time. So, with time, this part of the equation *should* sort itself out. My daughter likes her pretty well, too. We just got back from a week-long camping trip with our daughters, and we had a great time overall. So I'm hopeful about being truly accepted by his daughter. Dating after divorce, especially with kids involved, is such a phenomenal challenge! But there are some really great rewards if one is patient enough. Thanks, again, all! I'm in a pretty *up* mood today.
Merin Posted July 30, 2005 Posted July 30, 2005 Originally posted by centered His house is a mess and a disaster, but he enjoys working on projects together to make it better. He tends to be a slob at home, but if I find places for things, he puts them back. He just needs help organizing things, and he doesn't seem to mind the help when I offer it, so I think I can deal with that aspect. The biggest challenge to the relationship will be his daughter. She's 13 and is a typical teenager. LOL OMG We could be with the same Guy! My Boyfriends house is a straight up mess! LOL Between the 2 of us we have 4 Little Peeps... his daughter is 10 and his son is 3... I love his kids though and it hasn't been an issue... BUT again my BF wasn't going through a divorce when I met him, so I'm sure it makes a difference and I wasn't going through a divorce either (My Peeps are 8 and 5) and they love my Boyfriend.. so it's good. His EXW and my EXH haven't been anything but good to go with things.. as both of them also have other relationships.. so again, a good thing! Hope things continue to be good for you
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