LtDan95 Posted March 27, 2017 Posted March 27, 2017 So I have been dating my gf for a month now. Her prom is this week but she is taking another guy instead. The reason I am not going with her is because there is an age limit for her school's prom. Yes, I am 21 and my gf is 18. I wouldn't want her to go to her senior prom alone so I can understand it. She's going with some guy from a different school. But the thing is she said this guy used to have a thing for her. The past is the past, plus this guy had a girlfriend up until recently but they kind of broke things off. That's why him and my gf are going together. There is an after-prom party that she wants me to go to so I can meet all her friends. So I'm happy she still wants to be with me but I still feel uneasy about the whole "my girlfriend going to prom with another guy" situation. Am I in the wrong for feeling this way? I mean it's not like I want her to go dateless and have a bad time at her prom.
Simple Logic Posted March 27, 2017 Posted March 27, 2017 So I have been dating my gf for a month now. Her prom is this week but she is taking another guy instead. The reason I am not going with her is because there is an age limit for her school's prom. Yes, I am 21 and my gf is 18. I wouldn't want her to go to her senior prom alone so I can understand it. She's going with some guy from a different school. But the thing is she said this guy used to have a thing for her. The past is the past, plus this guy had a girlfriend up until recently but they kind of broke things off. That's why him and my gf are going together. There is an after-prom party that she wants me to go to so I can meet all her friends. So I'm happy she still wants to be with me but I still feel uneasy about the whole "my girlfriend going to prom with another guy" situation. Am I in the wrong for feeling this way? I mean it's not like I want her to go dateless and have a bad time at her prom. Yes, I think you are in the wrong. Ask her how everyone is dressing for the after party so you fit in and be the cool BF instead of a jealous AH.
somanymistakes Posted March 27, 2017 Posted March 27, 2017 It's awkward, and annoying that her prom won't let you come (I understand having age limits but I would expect three years to be acceptable) but a lot of people do go to prom with just friends, and if she's inviting you to the after prom party then it's pretty clear she wants to be with YOU and show you off as her boyfriend. If she were trying to keep you out of the after-prom party "because you didn't go to prom" THEN you'd have something to worry about. 1
preraph Posted March 27, 2017 Posted March 27, 2017 She didn't want to miss her prom. You just be right there at that party!! 2
DKT3 Posted March 27, 2017 Posted March 27, 2017 This is funny because my son just had the same thing happen but for a different reason. He recently started dating a young lady (both are 17) the day after they started dating he told his prom date he couldn't take her because it would be unfair to his new girlfriend, who by the way decided to continue her plans with her date. My son break up with her.
Whoknew30 Posted March 27, 2017 Posted March 27, 2017 Happened to me with my H...he flipped & told me he'd break up with me if I went. So I didn't go & I still get mad at him for it...on the up side, we married a year later & it was way better than prom! Calm down, she deserves to go to her prom & have fun. This is part of dating a younger girl...be cool!
Whoknew30 Posted March 27, 2017 Posted March 27, 2017 This is funny because my son just had the same thing happen but for a different reason. He recently started dating a young lady (both are 17) the day after they started dating he told his prom date he couldn't take her because it would be unfair to his new girlfriend, who by the way decided to continue her plans with her date. My son break up with her. If you already have a date for event like that...it's rude change plans, especially when young & going as friends. Good for your son's gf that she stuck to her plans...I was dumb & misses my prom. Any girl at that age shouldn't be given ultimatums.
DKT3 Posted March 27, 2017 Posted March 27, 2017 If you already have a date for event like that...it's rude change plans, especially when young & going as friends. Good for your son's gf that she stuck to her plans...I was dumb & misses my prom. Any girl at that age shouldn't be given ultimatums. Good for my son for recognizing the mismatch in commitment and expectations. He could teach a lesson in how to not accept less than. FYI it's my understanding that it is her ex boyfriend
Whoknew30 Posted March 27, 2017 Posted March 27, 2017 Good for my son for recognizing the mismatch in commitment and expectations. He could teach a lesson in how to not accept less than. FYI it's my understanding that it is her ex boyfriend My daughter is 17...I would never want her to do what I did so young... young kids should be just that, "young" & have fun & have no one that serious telling them what they can or can't do with a friend. I wouldn't like a boy that trying to tell my daughter what to do at such a young age...as a mom of a daughter, I would say good riddance. If a young person can't handle their bf or gf having friends & wants them to break promises & pre-plans with their friends..they're not secure enough to be in a relationship. Relationships, especially at that age shouldn't be based on ultimates & or owning the other person...it should automatically start off as trust & secure. OP...your girlfriend is young & she can walk away from you anytime. You'll never keep a girl by being insecure. You have to trust & if you don't & she's given you no reason not to trust her...you need to take a deeper look inside.
preraph Posted March 28, 2017 Posted March 28, 2017 Whatever you do, do NOT spoil her prom night by being sullen or angry about this. Keep a smile on and act like the best bf ever at that party so she'll be proud. Spoil a girl's prom night and you would end up on the bad end of a breakup, I can pretty much guarantee you. She's not getting dressed up like a princess for someone to make her cry.
aileD Posted March 28, 2017 Posted March 28, 2017 Happened to me and H. We started dating right before prom (I'm older) He already had a date who he was already going as friends with. I didn't expect him to take me, she already had her dress and they already were going with a group in a limo and all that. I just met up later . It's as mature a situation as you want to make it
whichwayisup Posted March 28, 2017 Posted March 28, 2017 Not many stick around at Prom, keep that in mind. Many enjoy the after parties so there's a good chance she's not going to spend hours there. Go have a good time, put the other guy out of your head. So what if he likes your gf. She's YOUR gf, not his and you have to have trust that if he makes a move on her she'll tell him to bug off.
Author LtDan95 Posted March 28, 2017 Author Posted March 28, 2017 One other matter I'm concerned about though is the dancing. I'm not sure how old the majority of the people replying to this thread are, but school dances these days always involve kids grinding on each other. I don't mind my gf dancing with this guy, as long as it's formal and not grinding. I don't want to say anything about it to her and I don't want to ask her after her prom if they grinded. It's just not an appropriate dance to do with someone else if you're in a relationship, IMO. But literally all of the dates at prom grind on each other, that's how it was for mine, I know that's how it will be for hers. Is this my jealousy coming in my head again? Or is that actually something that's normal to be jealous over...and should I be mad if she does?
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