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Posted

Hi,

 

I have been with my wife for 8 years and married for 5. I came hone from work early recently and could hear noises from upstairs. Initially I thought my wife was in pain. I went upstairs and she seemed panicked, red faced and flustered . I asked if she was ok and she assured me that she was.

 

I mentioned it to a friend recently who suggested that she was masturbating.

 

If this is the case is it something that I bring up with her or just ignore? Does it mean that she is unfulfilled?

Posted

Ignore.

 

Do you masterbate because you are unfulfilled? Likely not. She's just rubbing one out.

  • Like 4
Posted

Do you masterbate? I think most men do, even if they have a healthy and filling sex life.

 

I masterbate just about every day. Have done so since I was a teenager. I have also been married for years and we have a great sex life.

 

Each woman is different of course, but for me, when I am having lots of sex, I probably masterbate even more, as I am all qued up and feeling turned on all the time!

 

I would say most women masterbate because it feels good, not because their sex life is lacking.

 

Besides, women who masterbate often make better lovers. They understand what turns them on, what makes them cum, and can then have more satisfying sex because they understand their bodies.

 

Don't confront her about it. If she has been hiding it she is probably embarrassed about it.

 

Depending on the openess you two have, maybe ask her to "show you what she likes" while you are having sex sometime.

  • Like 2
Posted

Sex drives vary greatly by person. And vary greatly by year (or even day). There are some women who have regular sex and still regularly masturbate. That doesn't mean she isn't fulfilled.

 

If you aren't sure if your sex life is enough for her currently, I think you can ask her that, outside of the context of this.

Posted
Hi,

 

I have been with my wife for 8 years and married for 5. I came hone from work early recently and could hear noises from upstairs. Initially I thought my wife was in pain. I went upstairs and she seemed panicked, red faced and flustered . I asked if she was ok and she assured me that she was.

 

I mentioned it to a friend recently who suggested that she was masturbating.

 

If this is the case is it something that I bring up with her or just ignore? Does it mean that she is unfulfilled?

 

You have addressed two issues. Is she mastubating and is she unfulfiled. I'd skip the mastubation talk and maybe have the are you fulfilled talk.

  • Author
Posted

Thanks for the great advice guys :). It gives me something to think about and is reassuring to know it doesn't just mean i haven't been satisfying her

  • Like 1
Posted

Duh ! You shouldn't have talked about this to your friend , no matter how close you are.

 

Anyways, I know I do and I my wife also does. It has nothing to do with our relationship as it is.

Posted
Hi,

 

I have been with my wife for 8 years and married for 5. I came hone from work early recently and could hear noises from upstairs. Initially I thought my wife was in pain. I went upstairs and she seemed panicked, red faced and flustered . I asked if she was ok and she assured me that she was.

 

I mentioned it to a friend recently who suggested that she was masturbating.

 

If this is the case is it something that I bring up with her or just ignore? Does it mean that she is unfulfilled?

 

Does it mean that you are unfulfilled when you masturbate?

Posted
Does it mean that you are unfulfilled when you masturbate?

 

I do feel unfulfilled sometimes in a certain way: I want just an selfish, raging orgasm once in a while, something JUST for me. When I do, I get one for myself. Probably, I don't know, a couple of times a week?

 

Sex is a completely different thing. It's sharing and it's great, neither is better or worse than the other; they're both parts of what I want and need.

 

Sometimes I want a full-course dinner with strings playing in the background and great conversation. Other times I want Ramen Noodles on the couch guiltily watching reality TV. All by myself.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted

Thanks california girl lol that really helps. I guess i was being a bit naive. Your post puts a bit of perspective on it and i was probably worrying about nothing

  • Like 1
Posted
I do feel unfulfilled sometimes in a certain way: I want just an selfish, raging orgasm once in a while, something JUST for me. When I do, I get one for myself. Probably, I don't know, a couple of times a week?

 

Sex is a completely different thing. It's sharing and it's great, neither is better or worse than the other; they're both parts of what I want and need.

 

Sometimes I want a full-course dinner with strings playing in the background and great conversation. Other times I want Ramen Noodles on the couch guiltily watching reality TV. All by myself.

 

So does she I'd say.

 

Masturbation can be included in sex between partners as well. I enjoy watching my SO and vice versa. We do other things for each other while the other masturbates sometimes. It's incorporated into our mutual time together. I do not hide the fact that I masturbate and neither does he. I like to watch him do it for himself because I get to see exactly how he does it and learn how to do that for him.

Posted
I do feel unfulfilled sometimes in a certain way: I want just an selfish, raging orgasm once in a while, something JUST for me. When I do, I get one for myself. Probably, I don't know, a couple of times a week?

 

Sex is a completely different thing. It's sharing and it's great, neither is better or worse than the other; they're both parts of what I want and need.

 

Sometimes I want a full-course dinner with strings playing in the background and great conversation. Other times I want Ramen Noodles on the couch guiltily watching reality TV. All by myself.

 

you are being soooooooooo stingy.....LOL

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