avoj Posted July 27, 2005 Posted July 27, 2005 Hi! I posted a long post earlier about the breakup that occured b/w my exgf of 7-years. I have been reading a lot of breakup and coping message boards since all of this occured. I have noticed the same pattern over and over again from 100's of other people who are in the same situation as I am in. It's either your ex got close to a co-worker (I think that is my situation), they fell out of love with you, they need their space, they need to live alone for awhile, they get defensive about their new love affair denying everything, lies, sneakiness and the list just goes on and on. Now that I am on my own. I own the house thank god. IT was never put in her name. I noticed something. I sat down to figure out my finances (I always let her do it). I found that every single one of my utility bills are $100's of dollars over do. I was wondering why I never had any money (I make about $500 more than her a month. Once I figured it all out after everything is caught up, I am left over with like $800 a month. Now tell me, why is it I was broke all of the time when she lived here? Why wasn't she paying the bills? She was stealing from me. Not sure if she had this planned out along time ago and was saving up for it. For god sake she can't even pay her credit card bill. The min due for her bill is $800. SHe defaulted on her student loans. I have to wonder how long she has been cheating on me? MOnths? Years? NOt sure. She ran my phone bill up to $700. Over 400 text messages received/sent. SHe was getting and calling someone at 3am. It's so hurtful to think of her now. It's like I have been living with a stranger for 7-years. Did she ever care about me? Was she just using me for money? SHe walked out on me. I still am not sure why. There are a lot of questions still unanswered. I do know that I will never allow her back into my life. I hate that "Let's be friends" and the "I want you in my life somehow someway."
TheBarnacle Posted July 27, 2005 Posted July 27, 2005 I do know that I will never allow her back into my life. I hate that "Let's be friends" and the "I want you in my life somehow someway." dude, you're kidding right? you don't KNOW if you'll allow her back??!!?! wtf? let me tell you what i 'heard' you say: 1. she was stealing from you 2. she was cheating on you 3. she was using you 4. you don't know how long any of this was going on during your 7 years together 5. she left you 6. you feel foolish for EVER trusting her before...and you feel like you don't even KNOW who she is/was!!! (b/c she cheated, lied, stole, etc.) am i leaving anything out? your situation is unlike most. it's EASY!!! the decision part anyway. i'll say what i've said before, decisions are 1 part reasoning (this is the easy part), another part action (this is the hard part, takes courage). in your case, i'd imagine i could summon up enough anger to substitute for courage for the time being. walk away, wipe your hands, do penance if you think you must.....but PLEASE recognize that your trusting nature is a good thing. she sounds evil, don't let her jade you totally...but don't let her back in either. move on, pokey!
katty Posted July 27, 2005 Posted July 27, 2005 Sounds like she did you a huge favor, You might want to thank a higher power tonight for that blessing. Best of luck to you.
Author avoj Posted July 27, 2005 Author Posted July 27, 2005 No I do not want anything from her. Actually I do not want to see her ever again as long as I live. I emailed her today to tell her to come and get the rest of her things on Saturday. I told her everything will be on the porch. Goodbye and Goodluck. She emailed me back asking if there is a specific time and if she can contact me to get one or our cats. I replyed tell her Do not contact me ever. Do not call. Do not write. To forget I even exist and I will do the same of her. I told her no. I am keeping the cat b/c she is to immature to take care of anything. I told her now if you don't mind to please leave me alone.
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