FaithInTheDark Posted March 21, 2017 Posted March 21, 2017 Hello, I feel like a bit of a dork posting this as I'm in my late 20s but here we go. I met this guy through my ex bf and last summer us three became solid group of friends. Him and I grew a friendship that supassed the one him and my ex had. After the break up the friend was super supportive and he's just an all round amazing guy. He had actually taught me what I need in a man I know he's on a quest for love as he's kept me updated on his dating and such. Im really attracted to him and it's taken me a while to realize this. My ex is long gone out of the picture and moved out of town. I would like to see if this friend is attracted to me as well and could see me as a potential girl to date. Thing is, I have no idea where to start since we are friends. Any advice to approach this?
GoldSparkz Posted March 21, 2017 Posted March 21, 2017 Have you tried hanging out with him so that it's just the two of you? Perhaps invite him to a show or for some food - make the date informal and then see how he responds. If he accepts the invite, then go on the date and see if you guys can build a stronger connection. 1
smackie9 Posted March 21, 2017 Posted March 21, 2017 You are friends....even if you tried to set up date like hang outs, he is still going to think you are friends just hanging out. You are just going to have to come out and tell him. There is no need to "build up attraction" because you already established a connection with each other. It's either the attraction is there or not. IMO when a guy invests his time like that in a woman deep down he is interested but is afraid it blowing up in his face and losing the friendship. The ball is in your court now....make a move to tell him. You can just ask him if he ever thought about dating you..then take it from there.
zeeohsixer Posted March 21, 2017 Posted March 21, 2017 Send him a racy pic. no words needed. thank me later. Don't overthink this, its a man lol.
CaliforniaGirl Posted March 21, 2017 Posted March 21, 2017 This is tough because in my experience, FWTW, a guy who is friends with a girl and is looking for love and has any attraction romantically for the friend will make a move. He will start to be obvious about it even if he's shy. I've seriously had the shiest possible guy friends come on to me FAST once I was broken up with an SO. In fact I think they felt more comfortable doing so with me having been close to them than they would in approaching a woman they didn't know as well. And as for the other way around, when I felt like a guy "friend" was great BF material and that he acted caring toward me and so on, and I imagined he "just needed a push" so I was the one to say something, it just fizzled. I'm not saying it absolutely has to be that way. This is just my experience in many years of dating (before being married, obviously...I am currently married and have been for some time). I'm just saying...you can take a shot, go ahead and ask him, since it seems like he's definitely not going to bring it up himself. But brace yourself just in case the answer is no. That sounds dire and not very optimistic but you need to be realistic about this. He IS NOT going to ask you out. He would have by now. That's probably a pretty firm thing. So...if there's any snowball's chance it is on you to bring it up and take a risk. Think of it this way: guys take this sort of risk all the time. We girls can do it once in a while! If it's worth it to do so, anyway. So it's up to you but if he hasn't moved in now, with you right there in his space and him actively seeking a mate, it's not going to happen. He isn't going to be making that move. You can only come right out with it, or accept that you two are better as friends.
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