Jump to content

Why ask for my number if he isn't interested?


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

A few years ago, I met a guy in a bar. He added me on facebook because at that the time I prefered doing that to giving guys I didn't know my number. We spoke the day after, we seemed to be getting along well and he ended the conversation saying something like 'Ok have fun at work!' So I felt because he wasn't continuing the conversation that he can't be that interested in me so I unfriended him.

 

I recently saw him in my Suggested people and as I fancy him I decided to readd him, esp as i've just been dumped I thought why not? He accepted and a few days later send me a message saying it was random to recieve a request from me and that he remembered me. We chatted for a few days and he asked for my number because 'I don't use facebook alot' (but he does).

 

A few days later after no contact he sends me a Whatsapp... (why not a text?) Saying he had been busy and was sorry it had been a few days. We chatted again, got along well. He said Goodnight and then didn't hear all week.

 

The following weekend I decided to message him first and we spoke a little. I was the last one to reply as it was late and presumed he'd gone to sleep.

 

And thats it! That was a week ago. Im so disappointed to have not heard again. :( He seems like a genuine nice guy. It doesn't appear that he is involved with any girls as all his photos are with family and guy mates.

 

Any ideas? I'd feel silly to contact again after I readded him and was the last to contact.

Posted

DON'T approach him anymore... :)

 

The reason he asked for your number is that you approached him, he was curious why, and you kept this communication going, and he naturally figured "I guess she's expecting me to ask for her number?"

 

That sounds plain and simple but I really feel that's the case...he just figured, why not...this girl seems so interested...but he isn't really as interested in return.

 

DO NOT contact him again. :) No no no. Find a great guy who wants you! There are so many guys out there!

  • Like 5
Posted

Hi!

 

In these messages have you told him you are interested in him? Have you said, "I'm really attracted to you...."? A lot of times guys won't know how to perceive your messages. Tell him you're attracted and then back off. If he wants to pursue you he will.

 

Also how is your texting, flirting, innuendo game? I find the "mmmmm" message works wonders. He says I just got done eating.... you say, "mmmmm". It's that subtle innuendo that will get him to begin flirting.

 

Good luck my friend!

Posted

Sounds like the guys has some intelligence and saw all of the red flags that you are flying...you're all over the damned place!

  • Author
Posted
Sounds like the guys has some intelligence and saw all of the red flags that you are flying...you're all over the damned place!

 

What do you mean?

Posted
What do you mean?

 

Where do I begin? Read you first post and see if you can spot all of the "red flag" things that I see. An easy one is that you thought he was not interested in you because he told you to have fun at work.

 

What is your age and experience with relationships?

  • Like 1
Posted

OP, I think Titan means that you deleted/unfriend for no apparent reason other than what was in your head and unconfirmed only to friend request him randomly and out of the blue again.

 

You do come across as unsure with what you want and very young. Make a decision and stick with it until otherwise. I was young once and I did the same things as you.

 

Maturity comes with experience and learning from your actions.

  • Like 1
Posted

You know what.....he didn't show much interest the first time you were in contact with him, so why would you think he would feel any different now? If he fancied you to date you he would have asked you out the first time. I suspect he was waiting for you to ask for some casual sex, but that didn't happened so his interest wavered.

 

This guy doesn't deserve anymore of your time.

  • Author
Posted

Im 26 years old. Is it possible he doesn't want a relationship? Like I said... all his photos on facebook portray him as a guy who goes out with the lads alot. But he also seems quiet. Yes unfriending him wasn't the best move. I guess I was just feeling rejected at the time so thought f**k him, though reading that first convo he seemed fine with me, like you said... maybe he is put off now.

Posted

So, you having been contacting him via Whatsapp and not phone/text, right?

Posted

Sorry to hear this.

 

For future reference, don't unfriend people on Facebook unless you have to due to a major breakup and you need to truly forget about them.

 

It may be counterintuitive, but unfriending sends more of a signal than doing nothing at all. In other words, keeping the status quo in this case shows that you don't give a **** as opposed to appearing hurt or desperate.

 

I agree with the others. He's the man and let him contact you first. Stay friends with him on FB lol, just limit his view of your profile if you must.

  • Author
Posted
So, you having been contacting him via Whatsapp and not phone/text, right?

 

I gave him my number and then a few days later he Whatsapped me yes.

Posted

For me whatsapp is the more modern equivalent of texting. You need the phone number of the person to add them on whatsapp, so I don't see the difference with a regular text.

  • Like 1
Posted

He collects numbers from girls so as to have back ups when no one else is available and/or he's going through a dry spell . . .

  • Like 1
Posted

I would not think anything about his using WhatsApp versus text. All it means is that he prefers using WhatsApp to his texting app. It doesn't mean anything about you. Concentrate more on what he says and does than which messaging app he prefers to use.

 

I prefer WhatsApp to plain text because my mobile provider is sketchy. It will queue messages until there is either mobile or wifi service if I am out of a coverage area. The notice that someone has seen your message is also a nice feature (at least when you aren't trying to avoid someone, lol).

Posted
For me whatsapp is the more modern equivalent of texting. You need the phone number of the person to add them on whatsapp, so I don't see the difference with a regular text.

 

Can you explain to me this extra step though? If you have their number why not just text? Genuinely curious because I hear about WhatsApp a lot on here and I've never used it

Posted

everyone i know doesnt even use whats app is it only popular in other countries or something

  • Author
Posted

I just feel like WhatsApp is a lot more causal than a text, but maybe that's just me. To me, WhatsApp is like sending a Facebook Inbox.

 

Anyway, guy hasn't been in touch again. I get the message.

Posted
A few years ago, I met a guy in a bar. He added me on facebook because at that the time I prefered doing that to giving guys I didn't know my number. We spoke the day after, we seemed to be getting along well and he ended the conversation saying something like 'Ok have fun at work!' So I felt because he wasn't continuing the conversation that he can't be that interested in me so I unfriended him.

 

I recently saw him in my Suggested people and as I fancy him I decided to readd him, esp as i've just been dumped I thought why not? He accepted and a few days later send me a message saying it was random to recieve a request from me and that he remembered me. We chatted for a few days and he asked for my number because 'I don't use facebook alot' (but he does).

 

A few days later after no contact he sends me a Whatsapp... (why not a text?) Saying he had been busy and was sorry it had been a few days. We chatted again, got along well. He said Goodnight and then didn't hear all week.

 

The following weekend I decided to message him first and we spoke a little. I was the last one to reply as it was late and presumed he'd gone to sleep.

 

And thats it! That was a week ago. Im so disappointed to have not heard again. :( He seems like a genuine nice guy. It doesn't appear that he is involved with any girls as all his photos are with family and guy mates.

 

Any ideas? I'd feel silly to contact again after I readded him and was the last to contact.

well yall are not exclusive. So it's a high possibility that your not the only girl he talking to. So don't read into it. If he is not contacting you then you should stop caring. Care for guys who show they care for you. Give your care to the guy who does call. I don't know if your online dating or just crushing on this one guy. But if you are online dating you shouldn't be focused on one guy who don't call anyway. if your not into online dating, then still don't focus on this guy, focus on doing what you find enjoyable. If a man like you trust me he will call.
×
×
  • Create New...