No_Go Posted March 14, 2017 Share Posted March 14, 2017 Why one would get pissed? Some people just prefer not to be tagged on pictures, I'm one of them. If I get a picture tagged or posted on my wall I usually have my settings automatically to ask me for permission and I just never give it. I don't think she meant him just not putting up pictures. In the case of the poster she quoted, he specifically declined permission for a picture to appear on his timeline after the girl went through the effort of uploading it and tagging him. I wouldn't do that even to a platonic friend, honestly - I approve anything my friends tag me in when I see it. Obviously, the person just not logging in to FB is completely fine, but that wasn't what JJ was saying. I can understand someone getting pissed over a partner doing that to them, but not the OP's scenario. Link to post Share on other sites
anduina Posted March 14, 2017 Share Posted March 14, 2017 Didn't understand this until my b/f put my pic on his phone. It gives me a warm feeling inside that he wants to see me all the time. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Jj66 Posted March 15, 2017 Share Posted March 15, 2017 I noticed tonight that my gf has a picture of us on the home screen of her phone. No clue how long it has been there. It made me feel good to see it. Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 15, 2017 Share Posted March 15, 2017 I'm 100% not a fan of parading a relationship, even if it is dead serious. Maybe I'll compromise if I'm engaged with a wedding date, nothing less than that though. Relationships and dating are hard enough (and unfortunately volatile) to involve friends, family, classmates and random stalkers into them. I generally don't parade relationships on FB until about 6 months mark and if it's serious enough to have met all the friends and parents. However, if someone who frequently uses FB and posts pictures doesn't approve my tag, even if we have been together for months and have had a "serous" talk, something is off. I want a boyfriend that is fully transparent and proud to show me off 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted March 15, 2017 Share Posted March 15, 2017 I'm 100% not a fan of parading a relationship, even if it is dead serious. Maybe I'll compromise if I'm engaged with a wedding date, nothing less than that though. Relationships and dating are hard enough (and unfortunately volatile) to involve friends, family, classmates and random stalkers into them. Wait, so... you wouldn't introduce your partner to any of your friends until you're engaged with a wedding date? Why one would get pissed? Some people just prefer not to be tagged on pictures, I'm one of them. If I get a picture tagged or posted on my wall I usually have my settings automatically to ask me for permission and I just never give it. If someone had that blanket rule for everyone, it would be better than specifically declining relationship pics and approving all the others. Still, I think it's considered impolite in this day and age, the modern equivalent of not reciprocating a card that a friend sent you. If I didn't want to be tagged in any pictures, I would just not have a FB account at all, that would be much better. Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted March 15, 2017 Share Posted March 15, 2017 Not showing him on FB is not equivalent to not introducing him to ANY of my friends. I'll certainly introduce him to close friends (my usual timeline for friends introduction is after month or two, family is a different story). However, in FB I have hundreds of 'friends' who are coworkers, former classmates, near strangers etc. they don't have to witness a RL that is not set in stone (i.e. Wedding set). I use FB quite frequently without posting any pictures - mainly as a database of contacts and for private messaging. Wait, so... you wouldn't introduce your partner to any of your friends until you're engaged with a wedding date? If someone had that blanket rule for everyone, it would be better than specifically declining relationship pics and approving all the others. Still, I think it's considered impolite in this day and age, the modern equivalent of not reciprocating a card that a friend sent you. If I didn't want to be tagged in any pictures, I would just not have a FB account at all, that would be much better. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Jj66 Posted March 15, 2017 Share Posted March 15, 2017 My gf allows some but not all of our pictures on her timeline. That said, I'm definitely not being hidden. She occasionally checks us in to locations or adds her own pictures of us (or more usually just me) to her timeline. After we were together six months she set a relationship status. I've never talked to her about the subject but this is what I have observed. She is very careful about managing her online image. If she doesn't like the way she looks in a pic she won't approve it. If the pic makes her look like too much of a partier she won't approve it. Other times I can't figure out why she didn't approve. She always allows herself to be tagged so the images can be found with a search and our mutual friends can see them. She's just very guarded and controlled about what people see when the go to her page. She teaches digital marketing at a university so I guess this should be expected. Lol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CptInsano Posted March 15, 2017 Share Posted March 15, 2017 I don't do Facebook and my lock screen shows the Baroque facade of a hospital. I lead a rather calm life. Any requests by a girlfriend to change any of that would be futile. Link to post Share on other sites
GunslingerRoland Posted March 15, 2017 Share Posted March 15, 2017 Maybe it is a generational thing. I will also admit upon further reflection that there are some seemingly trivial things that make me nuts. I have told this story here on LS a few times. When we first got together DH would give me these elaborate cards that he really put thought into picking out. I prefer funny cards but he wanted this frilly prolific wordy ones. I came to realize it was because Hallmark had the words he couldn't find. Anyway, he used to sign them with his name. Nothing else. Not Love, his name. Not Dear D0nnivain. Not even the date. He simply wrote his name at the end. Made me crazy. I begged, I cajoled, I instructed (always a big winner in relationships), I whined (another great idea -- not). Eventually he caved & learned how to sign cards correctly IMO. This is kinda funny, I grew up in a family where every card for every occasion is To X Love Y. Nothing else, ever. My wife grew up in one where every card had a long heartfelt written message in it. It took a lot of adjustment on my part to get used to writing cards like that. Link to post Share on other sites
Jj66 Posted March 15, 2017 Share Posted March 15, 2017 I'm convinced that most relationships fail over trivial matters that no one, objectively, ought to be upset about. But we are upset because of how we were raised and the expectations that come along with all that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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