mikeylo Posted March 10, 2017 Posted March 10, 2017 Mine : I wasn't the romantic guy. I'm not even now I wish I was. My wife has become used to it but I really wish I was the romantic guy and do the lovey dovey surprise things ! Having an empty nest is giving us more time together that we spend to the best we can though. I regret not marrying her earlier than I did ,lol ! 3
preraph Posted March 10, 2017 Posted March 10, 2017 You could do the smallest little surprise romantic thing and she'd know how much effort it took and love, so do a little something. I regret getting too obsessive too soon and also not smiling more to be approachable. 3
Shanex Posted March 10, 2017 Posted March 10, 2017 I regret getting too obsessive too soon and also not smiling more to be approachable. Aye, this definitely. I rarely smile, and sort of look mean when you first meet me, whereas I'm a pretty laid back person, dare I say good guy well. Otherwise, regrets in dating like mishaps? Not really I've been young and more foolish and did stupid things that didn't get me a second dates. Missed many opportunities. Live and learn. 2
GoodOnPaper Posted March 10, 2017 Posted March 10, 2017 Listing what I don't regret would make for a much more concise post but here's a couple of big things . . . I took dating way too seriously - every rejection and relegation to the friendzone was a personal insult, so on the few occasions someone showed a little interest, I tried to jump into relationship-mode very quickly. I regret that I didn't sort out at least some of my "nice guy" issues before getting engaged and married - that really robbed me of the early infatuation stage of our relationship. Bailing out of a sinking ship probably shouldn't be the first analogy that comes to mind when deciding to commit to someone. And trying to resolve these issues retroactively while maintaining a stable marriage/family life is pretty frustrating in and of itself. If you regret not having more sensitivity . . . the other side is a lot worse, trust me. 1
d0nnivain Posted March 10, 2017 Posted March 10, 2017 Biggest regret -- staying in a going no where relationship too long / not giving him a ultimatum But in the end I am where I am supposed to be: married to a great guy. 3
todreaminblue Posted March 10, 2017 Posted March 10, 2017 i regret overthinking always...i regret my shyness....i regret thinking i don't deserve to be happy..i regret not speaking up...i regret having to disclose history...i regret not saying no.....i regret not enforcing boundaries..i regret apologizing for being who i am...i regret feeling that no one will ever really know me.....i regret feeling like i am a burden...i regret accepting less than i deserve .....i regret not standing my ground....i regret feeling that if it didnt work out it was eventually always my fault.....i regret silly little disagreements....i regret not saying thank you or please or sorry when i should have...... i regret expecting things to be better tomorrow... i regret the time i have wasted on guys who didnt really care for me making excuses for them because they were supposedly just having a bad day/........that turned into bad years.....i regret my walls...that were up against guys i should have let in because i felt i was too damaged for them and they were too perfect.....i regret putting guys on pedestals who need to be tied to ceiling fans.........i regret judging a book by its cover...... i have been working on this list for a very long time without dating anyone....... i dont regret that.....I have made progress..progress is good....:0)...and i feel next time i date...im goin for no regrets..heres hopin....and i never regret that i have hope.....maybe one day...ill find my guy who likes the color deep blue too....i regret the guy must love blue.........deb 1
DrReplyInRhymes Posted March 10, 2017 Posted March 10, 2017 Bruno Mars says it better in his song: Bruno Mars - When I was your man -- Same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now Our song on the radio but it don't sound the same When our friends talk about you, all it does is just tear me down 'Cause my heart breaks a little when I hear your name It all just sounds like ooh, ooh ooh hoo hoo Mm, too young, too dumb to realize That I should have bought you flowers And held your hand Should have gave you all my hours When I had the chance Take you to every party 'cause all you wanted to do was dance Now my baby's dancing But she's dancing with another man My pride, my ego, my needs, and my selfish ways Caused a good strong woman like you to walk out my life Now I never, never get to clean up the mess I made, oh And it haunts me every time I close my eyes It all just sounds like ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh Mm, too young, too dumb to realize That I should have bought you flowers And held your hand Should have gave you all my hours When I had the chance Take you to every party 'cause all you wanted to do was dance Now my baby's dancing But she's dancing with another man Although it hurts I'll be the first to say that I was wrong Oh, I know I'm probably much too late To try and apologize for my mistakes But I just want you to know I hope he buys you flowers I hope he holds your hand Give you all his hours When he has the chance Take you to every party 'Cause I remember how much you loved to dance Do all the things I should have done When I was your man Do all the things I should have done When I was your man -- 7
Mr Scorpio Posted March 10, 2017 Posted March 10, 2017 Not getting my life together and reaching the point I am at now but ten years sooner. Granted, the level of regret is pretty low because I'm pretty content with my life. Still, too much "Peter Pan syndrome" cost me my ex and she was really, really good to me and for me. 2
Eternal Sunshine Posted March 11, 2017 Posted March 11, 2017 I regret not being interested in being in a relationship in my 20s and being too career focused. Possibilities back then were plentiful. I regret not being able to travel back in time (at least 10 years) with my current mindset. 2
Marc878 Posted March 11, 2017 Posted March 11, 2017 Mine : I wasn't the romantic guy. I'm not even now I wish I was. My wife has become used to it but I really wish I was the romantic guy and do the lovey dovey surprise things ! Having an empty nest is giving us more time together that we spend to the best we can though. I regret not marrying her earlier than I did ,lol ! It doesn't take much. Pick up a meaningful gift for no reason. Take her out to dinner and a movie. Doesn't have to be expensive. Give her a foot massage got no reason. It's not that you're not romantic. I suspect you're thoughtless and don't care. Take her for granted at your own peril. What if someone else came along and showed her some attention? I've seen many who thought things were ok until they weren't. Better wake up
dichotomy Posted March 11, 2017 Posted March 11, 2017 Being more casual about sex, less shy and just going for it. I passed up many fun times as a young men in high school and college because I was shy, and had old fashioned view about sex, love and relationships. Lastly - and this would be hard to explain, but I let a very difficult bout with cancer at the end of college change my goals for marriage and family. I should have never let anything change this fundamental wish and dream. Took me a decade to turn back around. 2
carhill Posted March 11, 2017 Posted March 11, 2017 Your worst dating/relationship regrets ? If I had a time machine.... Mostly when younger, being a clueless romantic and not accepting the real. Honorable mention to being a complete dope about letting the challenges of distance, culture and language put me off a really good marital opportunity. 2
darkmoon Posted March 11, 2017 Posted March 11, 2017 (edited) being [an affair partner] just how stupid and vain was I? Edited March 11, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Language 1
Popsicle Posted March 11, 2017 Posted March 11, 2017 (edited) Mine : I wasn't the romantic guy. I'm not even now I wish I was. My wife has become used to it but I really wish I was the romantic guy and do the lovey dovey surprise things ! Having an empty nest is giving us more time together that we spend to the best we can though. I regret not marrying her earlier than I did ,lol ! The funny thing is you're telling us this but I'll bet you've never told her this. It might mean a lot to her for you to just say this to her. Mikelo, you seem paralyzed and scared of change because it has been this way for so long. It's so easy to be romantic and it's not scary at all. There have been some suggestions above and I think you know what to do but are afraid of rejection. Don't be afraid, if you know she craves these things then she will be thrilled that you are finally doing them and she will think she's died and gone to heaven. It will take a little bit of confidence and some readjustment for you both. Edited March 11, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Merge 2
spiderowl Posted March 11, 2017 Posted March 11, 2017 (edited) I regret putting off nice guys who were interested because I was too shy and didn't understand their behaviour. I regret not giving guys who approached me cold the time to find out more about each other. I was sure they were up to no good but I guess some of them were just being brave. I regret not being warm and showing interest if I was attracted to a guy. Again, shyness I suppose, but also fear of failure. I regret wasting time on a guy who was misleading me for his own needs. He said a lot of sweet things and wanted emotionally intimate conversations. He sounded like he wanted a real relationship when in reality he just wanted company online. I regret being stupid enough to think he meant what he said. Edited March 11, 2017 by spiderowl 3
JustGettingBy Posted March 11, 2017 Posted March 11, 2017 I regret not making a few specific moves and waiting too long to make a move a couple other times. 1
MrDuck Posted March 11, 2017 Posted March 11, 2017 I dont believe in regrets! If you can identify something you did wrong then thats a lesson (and ive had plenty of those) its only if you ignore the lesson that it can become a regret! At the end of the day your relationships, your life, your character, it's all in your control, it should be your choice how it plays out not something you settle for. If you have a regret, make the relevant change. I don't regret the mistakes I made because they made me the guy I am now, I do regret if those lessons ever came at the price of hurting someone else. That was never my right, and I'm sorry for that! I've grown up a lot since then, and i think the greatest service you can pay someone is to not repeat your mistake. 2
dichotomy Posted March 11, 2017 Posted March 11, 2017 (edited) Regret can be healthy emotion, but there are ways to cope. Edited March 11, 2017 by dichotomy 1
Got it Posted March 13, 2017 Posted March 13, 2017 I dont believe in regrets! If you can identify something you did wrong then thats a lesson (and ive had plenty of those) its only if you ignore the lesson that it can become a regret! At the end of the day your relationships, your life, your character, it's all in your control, it should be your choice how it plays out not something you settle for. If you have a regret, make the relevant change. I don't regret the mistakes I made because they made me the guy I am now, I do regret if those lessons ever came at the price of hurting someone else. That was never my right, and I'm sorry for that! I've grown up a lot since then, and i think the greatest service you can pay someone is to not repeat your mistake. Pretty much sums up my feelings as well. I really don't regret anything because of the lessons learned from them. I am sorry if it did hurt someone. For better or worse what makes me me is because of those actions and inactions along the way.
Chilli Posted March 14, 2017 Posted March 14, 2017 l regret stuff ups in my marriage in the later part. And l regret not being there for my ex when she really needed me, and not seeing that she really needed me , even though she hid it , l still should've known . So if your still married and have regrets or feel there things you should do or tell her, just DO IT. You won't regret that you only regret it if you don't.
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