Kind of lost on what I need to do with my boyfriend. Is it really just me?

[kittiehehe676]

I have been with my boyfriend over a year now and he is a sweet and caring person. We have had some issues because throughout the course of our relationship I have brought things to him that made me feel uneasy. I am an insecure person by nature it seems. I have realized that through my previous relationships that I was that way. My last relationship was abusive and eventually I figured that it was my gut telling me something was off with the guy and he continually blew off and disregarded my feelings excessively. It made me really insecure. I got with my new boyfriend, but have put myself in therapy as I hope to better myself in how insecure I am. From all the things I brought to my boyfriend, some were dumb and some were warranted. One issue I had was where he was all over some random girls page, liking all her photos. I talked to him about it and he said he would back off, but later it still became a fight with him. With every thing that made me insecure, he would fight me on it and then he said ultimately go along with it not to upset me. it really bothers me that he says he understand some of them, yet did not agree and so he would still fight me on them. I don't get that! I hoped that he would give some and understand that some issues make me feel uneasy and let them go and not fight me, but also I understand the part where he has to

Fight me on some that are ridiculous. Recently, he's starting to get really sick of me and I can see it in his attitude like he doesn't give a damn anymore because he's tired of it. I am just so sad and I don't know what to do. Sometimes I think he doesn't understand me and my issues I have because he fights me all the time. He says that why does it matter at the end of the day if he fights me? He is still

Doing what I want? But that doesn't make me feel like we are even on the same page. It makes me wonder if he even is considerate of my feelings. Some of the issues I have he with him were ridiculous and some I guess more warranted. Some of the issues I had had was asking why his phone was going off ( asking who he was talking to) him adding random women on social media, and liking their photos excessively as I took it like he was flirting on some level. The biggest thing that upset me was that he was carrying on conversations with random women he didn't know and it honestly felt shady to me because he likes making friends online who all are women as I saw and none men instead of hanging with his friends who he has known. I don't really know what I should do. I'm sick of feeling this way. I don't act super crazy and sometimes I get on a good streak feeling better in my self, but then end up seeing things like him adding women to his Facebook ( even though he toned it down a bit) and it just gets me annoyed. Besides this, because he fights me on all

Of this, I cannot tell if he is just one of those people who doesn't really care to take people's concerns into consideration. Do you all think that since he fights me a lot? I don't really know what to do at this point because I can tell he is getting sick of it. It shows in his attitude and the way he talks to me when he's mad.

[Gaeta]

From all the things I brought to my boyfriend, some were dumb and some were warranted. One issue I had was where he was all over some random girls page, liking all her photos. I talked to him about it and he said he would back off, but later it still became a fight with him. With every thing that made me insecure, he would fight me on it and then he said ultimately go along with it not to upset me. it really bothers me that he says he understand some of them, yet did not agree and so he would still fight me on them. I don't get that! I hoped that he would give some and understand that some issues make me feel uneasy and let them go and not fight me, but also I understand the part where he has to

 

Doing what I want? But that doesn't make me feel like we are even on the same page. It makes me wonder if he even is considerate of my feelings. Some of the issues I have he with him were ridiculous and some I guess more warranted. Some of the issues I had had was asking why his phone was going off ( asking who he was talking to) him adding random women on social media, and liking their photos excessively as I took it like he was flirting on some level. The biggest thing that upset me was that he was carrying on conversations with random women he didn't know and it honestly felt shady to me because he likes making friends online who all are women as I saw and none men instead of hanging with his friends who he has known. I don't really know what I should do. I'm sick of feeling this way. I don't act super crazy and sometimes I get on a good streak feeling better in my self, but then end up seeing things like him adding women to his Facebook ( even though he toned it down a bit) and it just gets me annoyed. Besides this, because he fights me on all

Of this, I cannot tell if he is just one of those people who doesn't really care to take people's concerns into consideration. Do you all think that since he fights me a lot? I don't really know what to do at this point because I can tell he is getting sick of it. It shows in his attitude and the way he talks to me when he's mad.

 

Here is what you do, you dump him and you find yourself a good boyfriend.

 

Listen, you are not insecure, your boyfriend is a rat.

 

When you know it hurts you to date a man that flirts around then you don't date one!! as simple as that!

 

Find yourself a nice guy that knows how to be a good boyfriend.

[Telemachus]

You're definitely not crazy. I'd say that he isn't either. What you two are is incompatible. You want different things. You have different standards and interests. It's as simple as that.

 

My opinion is that he's wasting time that could be more productively used for other things with all this liking of women's pictures online; however, here I am tapping away on your post here. The same could be said of me. Other than wasting his time, the problem is that he's engaged in activity that isn't acceptable to you as his girlfriend.

 

That doesn't mean he has to stop his online activity or agree with you, but one of you should have sense enough to realize that you're interests are incompatible, and end this relationship. Picture yourself in the future with him, married and with a couple of children under age 5. Do you really want to have this same fight, and many other fights, then?

 

Your efforts to reconcile and resolve your differences have been unsuccessful. That doesn't make you a bad person, nor him. It makes you a bad couple.

[Larryville]

I have been with my boyfriend over a year now and he is a sweet and caring person.

 

We have had some issues because throughout the course of our relationship.

 

When I see any OP posting something so contradictory in the first part of their thread, pretty much nothing else matters. Because if the OP posts this and is unable to see the contradiction for themselves ANY relationship they will ever be in will be rot with turmoil.

 

Hence:

 

*I am an insecure person by nature it seems.

*My last relationship was abusive

*I got with my new boyfriend, but have put myself in therapy

*he was all over some random girls page, liking all her photos. I talked to him about it and he said he would back off, but later it still became a fight with him.

*Fight me on some that are ridiculous.

*The biggest thing that upset me was that he was carrying on conversations with random women

*I cannot tell if he is just one of those people who doesn't really care to take people's concerns into consideration.

*I don't really know what to do

 

Ditto what G said…

 

Listen, you are not insecure, your boyfriend is a rat.

 

Naw dude is a jackass and if any young lady reading this and finds this situation similar ask yourself why do you tolerate being with an idiot?

 

When you know it hurts you to date a man that flirts around then you do don't date these men!! as simple as that!

 

This is not complicated. The right man makes your life easier… not saying things will be perfect but when a man ceases to treat you with respect dump his sorry @$$. Life is too short.

[Redhead14]

I have been with my boyfriend over a year now and he is a sweet and caring person. We have had some issues because throughout the course of our relationship I have brought things to him that made me feel uneasy. I am an insecure person by nature it seems. I have realized that through my previous relationships that I was that way. My last relationship was abusive and eventually I figured that it was my gut telling me something was off with the guy and he continually blew off and disregarded my feelings excessively. It made me really insecure. I got with my new boyfriend, but have put myself in therapy as I hope to better myself in how insecure I am. From all the things I brought to my boyfriend, some were dumb and some were warranted. One issue I had was where he was all over some random girls page, liking all her photos. I talked to him about it and he said he would back off, but later it still became a fight with him. With every thing that made me insecure, he would fight me on it and then he said ultimately go along with it not to upset me. it really bothers me that he says he understand some of them, yet did not agree and so he would still fight me on them. I don't get that! I hoped that he would give some and understand that some issues make me feel uneasy and let them go and not fight me, but also I understand the part where he has to

Fight me on some that are ridiculous. Recently, he's starting to get really sick of me and I can see it in his attitude like he doesn't give a damn anymore because he's tired of it. I am just so sad and I don't know what to do. Sometimes I think he doesn't understand me and my issues I have because he fights me all the time. He says that why does it matter at the end of the day if he fights me? He is still

Doing what I want? But that doesn't make me feel like we are even on the same page. It makes me wonder if he even is considerate of my feelings. Some of the issues I have he with him were ridiculous and some I guess more warranted. Some of the issues I had had was asking why his phone was going off ( asking who he was talking to) him adding random women on social media, and liking their photos excessively as I took it like he was flirting on some level. The biggest thing that upset me was that he was carrying on conversations with random women he didn't know and it honestly felt shady to me because he likes making friends online who all are women as I saw and none men instead of hanging with his friends who he has known. I don't really know what I should do. I'm sick of feeling this way. I don't act super crazy and sometimes I get on a good streak feeling better in my self, but then end up seeing things like him adding women to his Facebook ( even though he toned it down a bit) and it just gets me annoyed. Besides this, because he fights me on all

Of this, I cannot tell if he is just one of those people who doesn't really care to take people's concerns into consideration. Do you all think that since he fights me a lot? I don't really know what to do at this point because I can tell he is getting sick of it. It shows in his attitude and the way he talks to me when he's mad.

 

You've expressed your needs/concerns and he has attempted to address it. However, he's still continues that activity. In the end, he is not respecting your feelings and concerns and that is important to you.

 

You tell him that you are going to move on because you feel uneasy in the relationship and feel that you two are not compatible and that's a deal breaker for you.

[darkmoon]

start some likes of random men, maybe he will know how it feels, and if he is still mean, get into the random men (carefully, in piblic places to meet)

 

you do not need a guy who upsets you.

[kendahke]

You are wanting a man totally devoted to you and he's telling you he's not that guy, thus all this unnecessary squabbling.

 

He hears you, but he's not going to change what he's doing---he's telling you through his actions.

 

You either be fine with that if you need him in your life or you bounce and find someone else more in line with what you need out of a man.