john14 Posted March 5, 2017 Posted March 5, 2017 (edited) I broke up with my gf a couple months ago. We had been together 4 years and had a great relationship but being young and my first relationship, I wanted to see what it was like being single. We had talked and planned to get back together later on. I recently moved away and we have had NC for the past month. I really missed her and wanted her back. i contacted her a few days ago and she said she missed me and wanted to get back together but not until after the summer. It was hard but i agreed. I later found out that shes been talking to a guy and are pretty much dating but didn't want me to find out. I was heart broken. I really want her back but I'm not sure what to do anymore. Do i continue to fight for her or move on. Edited March 5, 2017 by john14
ExpatInItaly Posted March 5, 2017 Posted March 5, 2017 It would be best to move on. There was a reason you ended it - keep that in mind now. She rightly started her process of detaching from you from that moment, and things naturally took their course when she met someone else. She wasn't about to put her life on hold while you explored singledom, and neither should you try to wait around for her now. I have said it many times, but it's worth repeating: first loves are almost never our last. You will look back on your relationship with her with fond memories but you both outgrew it, it seems.
Marc878 Posted March 5, 2017 Posted March 5, 2017 If you're smart you'll do a bit of growing up now and move on like she has.
SunnyRainbows Posted March 5, 2017 Posted March 5, 2017 Actually as weird as it seems all of us need that time and space to realize what we really want in this life. And sometime it comes on the account of the relationship. But what is more important is that in that time you truly realize what is important for you, your goals in life and what you seek in all fields of your life. The only thing you really need to ask her politely and nicely is something along the lines of "Hey, I know that you are dating someone else right now, and if it is serious and you are truly happy I would not stand in-front of your happiness. I took my break, understood what I was seeking, my mind is set up. But I don't think that it will be right to build false hopes and wait for you as your relationship might actually turn into something serious which is great. How do you think we should more forward from here?" No need to fight, just be Kind but firm. Alexander, 1
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