Update[pregnant and dumped/Exfiancé still hurting me]

February 28, 2017

Pregnant and fiancé ended things horribly. I need advice, please.

I need help on how to maintain LC after my child is born. I am due in 16 days with a babygirl from my now ex fiancé.

I tried another forum but didn't get much feedback and I could really use the support in these moments. I'll give the background story...it's long but please stick with it as I need help. Fiancé(27) and I (i just turned 28 ) had a very loving relationship. He was an excellent step parent to my child of a previous failed marriage. My child loved him! We then conceived our second of which I am currently pregnant of. He was very happy to be expecting a bio child of his own. I on the contrary was hesitant, I did not feel ready but he encouraged me that he was ready to be a bio father. At the time things were rocky financially in our new apartment as finances were rough on one income. I was suffering from hyperemisis through out the pregnancy and pretty much an invalid. So as a result he got a new job in hopes of making more money. Within weeks of starting the job he became quickly distant from me and my child though I pegged the change to the new long work hours. The sex became less frequent but again I was sick, pregnant and I knew he was tired with the new work schedule. On frequent occasions we would exchange phones (we always did this, for games apps etc) I noticed on various occasions his iMessage window would be cleared off all messages. I wasn't snooping the window would be there. After noticing this for quite some time I outright asked... he said he was very OCD about his message window and liked it clear of old messages. I found it strange, he suddenly developed this "quirk" he never had. On one particular evening his phone went off as we laid side by side. It was a female coworker texting after work hours. He gave me a deer caught in head lights look. Stammered through an explanation and said he was clueless why she was texting him. His reaction led me to check his call records. Sure enough he was in fact deleting calls and texts from multiple female co workers. When confronted he said he had no idea why his phone and call records did not match that he had nothing to hide. For weeks arguments ensued I was made to feel like the crazy fiancé with her hormones acting up. Until I asked for an ultimatum. (Fyi not a fan of ultimatums but I felt crazy after two months of fishy and distant behavior. ) I asked that if it's true he had nothing to hide to log his iMessage into the iMac computer or id walk out for the night. Of course I didn't think he'd let me walk out in the cold, surely my loving fiancé would allow transparency (I naively thought he truly had nothing to hide just perhaps some light flirting and that I was nipping it in the bud) he outright refused! Instead he chose the trickle truth method ...he said his texts were inappropriate and some were of the sexual nature ....he said "I can't let you see the messages they'll kill you". He told me a bit of some of the exchanges but of course didn't tell me everything. I fell to the floor but I stood by my ultimatum and walked out at 2 am and made the winter journey to my mothers apartment for the night with my other child w/- just the clothes on our back . He never stopped me and didn't try to convince me to return.

The next day I wasn't asked to return home. He instead proceeded to attend his companies Christmas party that following evening, get drunk, kiss a co worker and text me all about it while saying he wanted to be single. He stated "i have been an animal to you", I was blindsided. Days of back and forth and finally on Christmas Eve night he had both my child and I visit what was still our home(he'd ask for space so I remained at my mothers till he asked to see us). I asked if his feelings for me changed and he admitted that they had. My Christmas was shattered. I then offered to move out and again no fight was put up just lots of crying on his part and "I'm sorry's" and wanting to hug me. In the midst of this crying he did admit he wanted his cake and to eat it too. Yes those exact words! And again lots of crying on his end, trying to hug me and hold me.

I slowly began the packing up process. It took me days to pack up and move out. I had no one to help me so I had to drag bags and boxes with pulley carts back and forth from his apartment to my mothers who luckily didn't live too far off. It took me 2 weeks. He never offered to at least get a moving truck instead I was asked to move my things out while he was at work. I was stonewalled during this period. He wouldn't reply to texts. He'd ignore my calls. He sometimes emailed me with excuses if he felt like it. This caused me to become physically ill, I lost weight, I was at risk for preterm labor and my first child was devastated and could not understand why his step dad wasn't around. He'd cry and began to show severe separation anxiety.

For days and weeks I would argue, beg, cry to get him to explain to me why he chose this method to end things. All via text! Never on call or in person. He would ignore me at times and others he would tell me he wanted me to wait for him to get mental health help before trying anything with me again. He would tell me he missed me but made no attempts to get back with me. A week after my move out his mother asked I walk her to his place(she doesn't know the area) as she had a copy of the keys to his place, she too had been worried with his sudden ending of our seemingly perfect relationship. She was dropping off food and checking if he was stocked with things. I didn't want to go on in but as pregnancy would have it I needed to use the restroom. And there it was a golden necklace with a heart shaped rhinestone in what was once my bathroom sink. In our old bedroom had an ash tray with a lipstick smeared tissue beside it. (He smokes a lot of marijuana now, we found lots of it laying around...he used to smoke it but not as heavily, at least not during our relationship ) He had also taken our oversized canvas photo and turned it in such a way that if anyone walked in to our bedroom you could not see the contents of the photo. I messaged him photos of my findings as his "I miss you's" "and I don't want to just be co parents when our daughter arrives" had me very confused and feeling betrayed finding such things...I felt strung along. As if he wanted to keep me around while he slept around or built another relationship.

After this scenario another week went by and he kept trying to talk me into waiting for him to get mental health help(of course these statements were said when I reached out to him only). He would say he missed me but he still didnt say he loved me so his words were baffling. I was being asked to wait for him to see a doctor and then he'd miraculously want me back? After this back and forth I stopped him in his tracks and said no. Then after, I only kept up discussions about the incoming baby which he has bought little to nothing for. Conversations then after were unproductive so I stopped and began no contact. Of course I kept breaking the no contact and id text to pry and find out why he'd chosen to behave so animalistic with me after he ended it with me. Eventually he admitted that after the break up he'd slept with 2 women and had been using elicit drugs. None prescribed Xanax, Percocet...marijuana in heavy doses and alcohol. He said he'd stopped all the heavy drugs and was now currently only consuming marijuana. He claimed to have been trying to runaway from his emotions. But still claimed he wasn't in love with me and only hoped to be a father. Though he wants to keep me to himself hence I cannot mention the thought of me moving on. He claims it hurts him too much to hear it. Clearly he is selfish.

Everything that has occurred has left me confused as I still do not know why he did what he did. Though I'm trying to let go of wanting to know why...I am only harming myself. With everything that has occurred how do I gain my self respect and worth back ? I can't keep doing no contact after she arrives, I will have to see him and face him after all this time. I don't feel ready.

He asked to see my first child and I not too long ago but I declined as I found seeing him would only hurt me and my child yet again(plus he keeps throwing this friendship crap my way, as if it were that easy) I haven't faced him since that December Christmas Eve.....but now that the clock is ticking, eventually I will have to face him when my little girl arrives. What am I suppose to do? I have kept my emotions controlled after I decided he wouldn't string me along anymore but how will I do that when he's standing before me holding our child?! I have done quite a lot of healing thus far...I do not want his presence to set me back again.

My daughter will be breastfed so he will not be able to take her. Instead he has to visit her in my home. Regardless having him in my life due to him wanting a child(one I was not ready for) and then disposing of me as if I were garbage is going to make it very hard on my emotional well being. What do I do?

February 28, 2017

This is a very sticky Situation, I'm probably not the best person to give you advice as I'm in a hopeless situation myself..

You just need to stay with your parents, let your mother help you out as much as she can.. she will understand.

It's so much easier said then done but you have to try and be strong, don't emotionally torture yourself because that guy is too stupid to realise what he's doing..

February 28, 2017

This is a very sticky Situation, I'm probably not the best person to give you advice as I'm in a hopeless situation myself..

You just need to stay with your parents, let your mother help you out as much as she can.. she will understand.

It's so much easier said then done but you have to try and be strong, don't emotionally torture yourself because that guy is too stupid to realise what he's doing..

That is exactly how I feel I will feel when I HAVE to see him....emotional torture. I'm at peace with not being with him. Why be with someone so cruel? But the torture and emotions that'll arise in just a matter of days ...im petrified for myself. I am a mother and need to keep myself composed for those two innocent lives

February 28, 2017

So sorry the baby's father turned out to be less than honorable.

First get yourself a counselor. You have a lot to process. Then get yourself a lawyer. Daddy owes Child support. You need that money. If he has money for drugs, he has money for his child.

You need to fight for your kids. You can lick your wounds later. Rely on your mom for now.

Best wishes.

February 28, 2017

Wow.. I'm so sorry...

Before I start my.. rant... Is he still wanting to be in the soon to be babies life?

Really and truly. Until you're hormones and everything is settled I wouldn't allow you around her. Stress can stop you from getting milk, it will stress you out being around him. I personally would ask him to step out of the picture for a while until you and the baby are in a good spot.

Even if he is wanting to be the father... Don't put his name on the birth cert unless you are really needing the child support. He doesn't have any rights to her unless he proves his the dad by a DNA test. Not trying to sound horrible about him, but if he really wants to do that, He will go to court and get you to let them do the DNA. Atleast that'll give you turn to heal and get passed him. And you don't have to let him in the hospital, It's not taking anything away from your daughter. She needs you, and not someone that is stressed because someone wont give her space. He screwed up and he gets to live with it.

February 28, 2017

Again. I've seen this so many times. Do NOT put the guys name on the birth certificate unless you are sure he will be around for the child, or you really need the help to care for the child. So crappy to play the system like this, but you either need him (by money and allowing him time with his daughter) or you can make him fight for it and give you time with your child alone.

February 28, 2017

Wow.. I'm so sorry...

Before I start my.. rant... Is he still wanting to be in the soon to be babies life?

Really and truly. Until you're hormones and everything is settled I wouldn't allow you around her. Stress can stop you from getting milk, it will stress you out being around him. I personally would ask him to step out of the picture for a while until you and the baby are in a good spot.

Even if he is wanting to be the father... Don't put his name on the birth cert unless you are really needing the child support. He doesn't have any rights to her unless he proves his the dad by a DNA test. Not trying to sound horrible about him, but if he really wants to do that, He will go to court and get you to let them do the DNA. Atleast that'll give you turn to heal and get passed him. And you don't have to let him in the hospital, It's not taking anything away from your daughter. She needs you, and not someone that is stressed because someone wont give her space. He screwed up and he gets to live with it.

Hit the nail on The head.. listen to this wise one

February 28, 2017

Wow.. I'm so sorry...

Before I start my.. rant... Is he still wanting to be in the soon to be babies life?

Really and truly. Until you're hormones and everything is settled I wouldn't allow you around her. Stress can stop you from getting milk, it will stress you out being around him. I personally would ask him to step out of the picture for a while until you and the baby are in a good spot.

Even if he is wanting to be the father... Don't put his name on the birth cert unless you are really needing the child support. He doesn't have any rights to her unless he proves his the dad by a DNA test. Not trying to sound horrible about him, but if he really wants to do that, He will go to court and get you to let them do the DNA. Atleast that'll give you turn to heal and get passed him. And you don't have to let him in the hospital, It's not taking anything away from your daughter. She needs you, and not someone that is stressed because someone wont give her space. He screwed up and he gets to live with it.

I will not put him on the birth certificate and she will have my last name

He claims he wants to be in her life and is angered when anyone disagrees; per his dismissive behavior that it doesn't seem like it. But you're right I need to go self protective mode ..at least for myself and my children.

February 28, 2017

Again. I've seen this so many times. Do NOT put the guys name on the birth certificate unless you are sure he will be around for the child, or you really need the help to care for the child. So crappy to play the system like this, but you either need him (by money and allowing him time with his daughter) or you can make him fight for it and give you time with your child alone.

Is it really that common? I almost feel foolish that I am in this situation except I had no clue it would or could happen to me.

February 28, 2017

Is it really that common? I almost feel foolish that I am in this situation except I had no clue it would or could happen to me.

I'm 30 so close to your age... A LOT of my friends that had children in their early 20's have dealt with this kind of crap. Kids are 5-10 years old now, 8 out of 10 times, The father moves on to a different family and involved with that family and forgets the other child. Whenever he matures or whatnot.

They hang around for a couple years and go back into the party stage and just wants to visit the kids yearly. Don't pay child support, thousands of dollars in the hole so they get cash for jobs...

It's a hard situation to watch my friends be in. But you have to figure out what you think he'll be. If he wants to play Dad, let him and he'll get bored. I have one friend that finally found a great husband and they have been fighting for 4 years trying to get the bio dad off her birth certificate.

I know you know what your mom instincts are, and I would use them. Men don't understand the first few months she is completely relying on you. Btw you deserve a manicure and a massage!

February 28, 2017

I'm 30 so close to your age... A LOT of my friends that had children in their early 20's have dealt with this kind of crap. Kids are 5-10 years old now, 8 out of 10 times, The father moves on to a different family and involved with that family and forgets the other child. Whenever he matures or whatnot.

They hang around for a couple years and go back into the party stage and just wants to visit the kids yearly. Don't pay child support, thousands of dollars in the hole so they get cash for jobs...

It's a hard situation to watch my friends be in. But you have to figure out what you think he'll be. If he wants to play Dad, let him and he'll get bored. I have one friend that finally found a great husband and they have been fighting for 4 years trying to get the bio dad off her birth certificate.

I know you know what your mom instincts are, and I would use them. Men don't understand the first few months she is completely relying on you. Btw you deserve a manicure and a massage!

I sure do deserve to pamper myself the last days before birth are so rough. Do these men ever even see the error in their ways? I don't understand how he TALKED ME into going through the pregnancy and he just simply checks out of the relationship so easily. He saw how my ex husband (he is active in my first childs life) only sees my son two days of the week. Always said he didn't want that...but here is doing exactly just that and probably being less involved then he originally intended.

February 28, 2017

I sure do deserve to pamper myself the last days before birth are so rough. Do these men ever even see the error in their ways? I don't understand how he TALKED ME into going through the pregnancy and he just simply checks out of the relationship so easily. He saw how my ex husband (he is active in my first childs life) only sees my son two days of the week. Always said he didn't want that...but here is doing exactly just that and probably being less involved then he originally intended.

I think if and when they do, it's too late. And usually its when the kids are grown. Seen that with friends with their parents also.

Sadly he left you in the worse possible time, when you DO need that support. That being said, what do you expect he'll do to your child, expect that until he shows a different side of himself. I'm sure he started realizing his life was going to change and he acted out. Who knows what the excuse is. Just prepare yourself. I, myself, had a very rough beginning in my pregnancy, the last part I don't think I would of made it, kudos for being so tough!

February 28, 2017

I think if and when they do, it's too late. And usually its when the kids are grown. Seen that with friends with their parents also.

Sadly he left you in the worse possible time, when you DO need that support. That being said, what do you expect he'll do to your child, expect that until he shows a different side of himself. I'm sure he started realizing his life was going to change and he acted out. Who knows what the excuse is. Just prepare yourself. I, myself, had a very rough beginning in my pregnancy, the last part I don't think I would of made it, kudos for being so tough!

Thank you. I was diagnosed with hyperemisis and somehow I've been making it this far. Not sure how but I am

It angers me that he wants the comfort of thinking I'll stick around and even says things like he hopes "somehow we are meant to be in the future" what the flip?!

Some of my close male friends say he probably wants to enjoy his freedom and then return to me when he gets tired of exploring the single life again. ...yeah not happening lol

Perhaps this may sound conceited or perhaps maybe I do have some self worth left underneath the layer of hurt but I'm quite catch and attractive. He on the other hand wellll haha

Edited February 28, 2017 by yaya1289
Sp

February 28, 2017

Thank you. I was diagnosed with hyperemisis and somehow I've been making it this far. Not sure how but I am
It angers me that he wants the comfort of thinking I'll stick around and even says things like he hopes "somehow we are meant to be in the future" what the flip?!

Some of my close male friends say he probably wants to enjoy his freedom and then return to me when he gets tired of exploring the single life again. ...yeah not happening lol
Perhaps this may sound conceited or perhaps maybe I do have some self worth left underneath the layer of hurt but I'm quite catch and attractive. He on the other hand wellll haha

He sounds like a cake eater. Not worth your time because he'll just do it again. His excuses will always be different but he'll always do the same thing.

Good! He doesn't deserve you!

March 2, 2017

Hi. I'm so sorry you are going through this especially when you are so close to your due date. Not that anytime makes it easy. I would second the earlier post about finding a counselor and a lawyer before the baby gets here. A counselor can help you work through the hurt and betrayal as well as give you some wisdom from the point of view of someone outside the situation. Sometimes when we are in the midst of that kind of hurt our point of view can be clouded. Getting a lawyer before the baby comes will help you make good decisions about the future and help you know your legal rights/obligations. Praying for you!

March 2, 2017

I will not put him on the birth certificate and she will have my last name
He claims he wants to be in her life and is angered when anyone disagrees; per his dismissive behavior that it doesn't seem like it. But you're right I need to go self protective mode ..at least for myself and my children.

Talk to a lawyer before the baby is born. If you want Child Support whether you can get it may depend on what you write on the Birth Certificate. Don't screw up your kids' entitlement to support out of some misguided sense of pride or because you are angry at the baby daddy. If you don't want / need his money, fine, don't spend it. Open a bank account for your child & put every penny of the child's money in there. Then the child will have money for college when the time comes.

March 3, 2017

I'm not really sure what I am feeling. I am overwhelmed by the fact that I have a child on the way, pretty much any day now. Perhaps I need time to birth and then process. I know I need legal counsel and counseling too as the hurt is so raw. It's become even harder given he has popped up and showing remorse. Not attempting to return to me but remorse. He is respecting he needs to stay away and give me space though. I'm reaching into my strength reserves at this point

March 3, 2017

I sure do deserve to pamper myself the last days before birth are so rough. Do these men ever even see the error in their ways? I don't understand how he TALKED ME into going through the pregnancy and he just simply checks out of the relationship so easily. He saw how my ex husband (he is active in my first childs life) only sees my son two days of the week. Always said he didn't want that...but here is doing exactly just that and probably being less involved then he originally intended.

I am so sorry you are going through this, Yaya. I am here to tell you that you will get through this, you will have a beautiful daughter to add to your family and he will be the one missing out.

I married a man who I thought I loved, who was a wonderful stepfather to my son from a previous relationship. I was content with my little family, but he wanted a child of his own, and seeing how he was a good father, I wanted to give him that. Unfortunately, he had some issues with his sperm count (sorry, TMI) and we ended up having to go through IVF. I had twins as a result. 9 months after we had twins, we bought our house. 9 months after that, he changed his mind. That is literally what he told me - he just changed his mind about everything, that he didn't want any of this. I then found out he had been unfaithful.

My XH was very charming, convincing, seemed genuine, was what every one of my friend's wanted in a husband. He was none of that - it was all a show, unfortunately, and he was able to easily check out. Be grateful that you see your X's true colors when you do, as painful as that is.

What followed were many challenging years - I won't sugarcoat it. But I have three amazing children. He is involved, but clearly this was not the life we planned. He has missed out, it is all his loss - not mine at all. While it was difficult, I wouldn't change it - I've learned so much from that relationship, and I have gained two wonderful kiddos.

Talk to your mom, your friends, find support through a counselor if possible. Establish custody, get child support in order. If you have proof of his illegal drug use - keep any evidence you might have in the event there are custody challenges. It sounds terrible, but you need to do this to protect yourself and your children.

It is great that you can stay with your mom, that takes a lot of stress away there. Keep writing, try to limit contact and/or have any necessary communications through another party (maybe your mother). I know this is the last type of childbirth you ever expected, I know that the pain probably feels physical, like a mountain sitting on your chest, and that this is supposed to be one of the happiest times. Trust me, I know you don't see it now, but you will get through this and one day, you will look at this without pain. Keep writing here.

(((hugs)))

March 4, 2017

Link to previous thread

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/615404-pregnant-dumped-like-garbage

The hurt is very real today. Somehow the closer baby is due (11 more days) the easier it has been for the ex fiancé to speak to me. Of course with no intention of working anything out with us but apologizing (about not loving me without actually saying it) the last blow was him telling me via text he will hopefully find a woman that loves our daughter as much I love her though he's not actively searching and is letting things just happen in his life. I'm not sure if he understands how hurtful these words are to me. I have constant contractions on a daily (body is surely prepping for labor) I don't need hear that he is now waiting for his supposed soulmate that will be this fabulous step mother he believes she will be. He's suddenly completely normal has stopped the harsh drugs and partying and sticking to some basic friends and his weed plus work. He almost seems like a greener grass case. Regardless I am pregnant and his words have left me torn. He reopened a wound I had long worked to heal. Keeping him away is no longer an option..he has respected to stay away for the birth and to give me a few weeks to adjust after birth however he has fully expressed he wants some form of visitation then after. Has agreed to court ordered child support as well. She will be breastfed and not be given bottles at least not at first to avoid nipple confusion. He fully intends to be around my home even if just weekends to hold her. How on earth is this healthy for me? How do people move on in a situation like this? Seems impossibly insane. This guy cheated on me, put me out of my own home, didn't care my son cried and suffered his absence, had the audacity to tell me about the lifestyle he was living, the # of women he slept with and now that he's all done with that....he's "sorry" "didn't ever mean to hurt me" "and is going to find the one for him one way or another" ...his words. I cut the conversation politely after this. I do not need to hear this. I almost wish I could see what on earth he's thinking how did we go from fine to "Im not happy" "I love you but not in love with you" everything going to hell after to the current feeble apologies he's throwing my way. What is he thinking ?!

March 4, 2017

This guy is a complete waste of oxygen.

You need to pick your partners more carefully in future, especially one's you are making baby's with.

Sorry this isn't meant to sound harsh.

I sense you're quite young?

March 4, 2017

This guy is a complete waste of oxygen.

You need to pick your partners more carefully in future, especially one's you are making baby's with.

Sorry this isn't meant to sound harsh.

I sense you're quite young?

I am 28. He wasn't like this I can assure you, if he was he surely had me fooled. And I do think I was. Not harsh at all. I am not having anymore children however. I have a DS and now will have a DD. 2 is enough for me I will be returning to school for my second degree and my child making days are done.

March 4, 2017

I'm really sorry at what you are going through. This guy is just appalling. He takes drugs, he has mental issues (which is not bad in itself but it is if he does not try to resolve them), above all he has no understanding of your feelings whatsoever. He does not deserve access to your child because he is incapable of being a decent father and he abandoned you when you needed him most.

I agree you need to speak with a lawyer, before the child is registered that's for sure.

He is so incredibly thoughtless that you cannot trust what he says at all. All he is doing at the moment is hurting you. He has not offered any support as far as I can tell. You do not have to maintain contact with him and hear his painful messages. This is definitely a case for blocking him on every front. He would have to fight for visitation rights. Take recordings, keep messages and store them as evidence. If this ever comes to court, let a judge decide on his character. The guy does not deserve you. Going no contact is the only way to stop him torturing you like this. It is never easy to do that but people opt for no contact for a reason - usually to avoid ongoing anguish that shows no signs of getting better.

I hope all goes well for you with the birth and that you can enjoy your lovely baby. Please do not entertain this guy even visiting. He has no right, given the way he treated you and your baby.

Edited March 4, 2017 by spiderowl

March 4, 2017

Is it ever ok to keep a biological father away from his child if he expresses he'd like to be present early on? Can he not also use this against me if he pursues visitation? A close friend who experienced the same was taken to court by her ex and the judge was non to pleased about her keeping the daughter away...the ex won visitation. I guess legal counsel would be my best option.

The emotional part I believe is the hardest. His parents are quite invested in being a part of my daughters life though truth be told I'd much rather they all just disappeared and let me be to heal. I can completely block everyone from my phone but innocent people will be hurt in the process. It is an overall messy situation...and I just have to wonder how will I deal? Logically I can send them all to hell..but those oh so tricky emotions

March 4, 2017

I read your previous post and couldn't find anything meaningful to say to you other than "that guy is the worst", which won't help. All I can say, as someone mentioned before, is that you need to see a lawyer immediately and get the legal matters sorted out as soon as possible, both for you and your baby. That guy is so unreliable and his lack of empathy is so deep that even with the law backing you, you may have difficulties to have him meet his obligations.

You sound like a very good-natured person who deserves more for you and your kids. I think it would be good for you to keep posting here. Even if some of the advice sounds a bit harsh or cold-hearted sometimes, they come from people who are not emotionally involved and therefore can provide a more detached perspective.

Think of yourself and your two little ones. Best wishes!

March 4, 2017

I read your previous post and couldn't find anything meaningful to say to you other than "that guy is the worst", which won't help. All I can say, as someone mentioned before, is that you need to see a lawyer immediately and get the legal matters sorted out as soon as possible, both for you and your baby. That guy is so unreliable and his lack of empathy is so deep that even with the law backing you, you may have difficulties to have him meet his obligations.

You sound like a very good-natured person who deserves more for you and your kids. I think it would be good for you to keep posting here. Even if some of the advice sounds a bit harsh or cold-hearted sometimes, they come from people who are not emotionally involved and therefore can provide a more detached perspective.

Think of yourself and your two little ones. Best wishes!

Hearing that he is the worst does help ha! If others can see it too I don't feel too crazy.

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Update[pregnant and dumped/Exfiancé still hurting me]

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