Risha7 Posted March 4, 2017 Posted March 4, 2017 Hi I'm 23 old girl.my guy n i were in love from high school and when i was 18 we go break up and haven't seen in a while in 2014 we got back and we shared awesome love we discussed so many things bout future ,marriage babies and all.he was so into me although he Is stubborn yet he loves me a lot and Always cared for me after i lost my father i had anxiety he was still with Me taking care of me last year i noticed he took me for granted when i ask him we started to have on off arguments but still was in love.we did have sex in between which he always enjoys with me but recently he went to university which is 9 hours travel distance from me,he was ok and suddenly when i question him where he went with whom he become so irritated and start to ignore my question. I don't know what kind of stress he was undergoing but i was keep texting him n i said i miss him which he replied he don't and then i said i love you he just replied 'hmm' and that night he messaged me to leave him alone for sometime and asked for space i was afraid and said i want you he replied he want his happiness which shattered me and the next day i called him,then he called me back and i said ok i give you the space,i won't text or call you anymore he said take care of your health in very gentle voice i said ok and hang up.after that i blocked him in WhatsApp and haven't talk,text or posting anything in my fb.it has been 3 days now he haven't reach for me but I'm scared if he don't come back :'( pls help me
CollegeKid101 Posted March 4, 2017 Posted March 4, 2017 Hi I'm 23 old girl.my guy n i were in love from high school and when i was 18 we go break up and haven't seen in a while in 2014 we got back and we shared awesome love we discussed so many things bout future ,marriage babies and all.he was so into me although he Is stubborn yet he loves me a lot and Always cared for me after i lost my father i had anxiety he was still with Me taking care of me last year i noticed he took me for granted when i ask him we started to have on off arguments but still was in love.we did have sex in between which he always enjoys with me but recently he went to university which is 9 hours travel distance from me,he was ok and suddenly when i question him where he went with whom he become so irritated and start to ignore my question. I don't know what kind of stress he was undergoing but i was keep texting him n i said i miss him which he replied he don't and then i said i love you he just replied 'hmm' and that night he messaged me to leave him alone for sometime and asked for space i was afraid and said i want you he replied he want his happiness which shattered me and the next day i called him,then he called me back and i said ok i give you the space,i won't text or call you anymore he said take care of your health in very gentle voice i said ok and hang up.after that i blocked him in WhatsApp and haven't talk,text or posting anything in my fb.it has been 3 days now he haven't reach for me but I'm scared if he don't come back :'( pls help me Hi Risha, I'm sorry you're going through this. You have to go no contact, do not message him and do not contact him in anyway. I'm guessing he wants to enjoy university since it is a new environment and nothing he has seen before. I don't think he was under any stress other than you insisting for validation of your relationship with the: "I miss you's" and "I love you's". He has checked out of the relationship...this is not a break, but more of the first step of him breaking up with you. Three days is incredibly long to not contact your girlfriend, I'm assuming he no longer sees you as that. I know that all was horrible to hear..BUT! Now it's time to get over this guy. He dropped you through a text message basically. What kind of man does that? The best thing you can do is focus on yourself! Start going to the gym everyday, go out with your friends, and if you need to cry/vent, consult either us here at LS or your family. I'm so so sorry you have to go through this..it's a part of life. Make sure you stay NO CONTACT. If you continue to text/call him, he'll get annoyed and drive him further away from you. 1
Author Risha7 Posted March 4, 2017 Author Posted March 4, 2017 Tq collegekid for your advice .yes i really want to go on no contact with him . when i asked why he needs space he also said that he needs some alone time for him because he feel guilty that he Is cheating him and myself.its really hard for me to get over this guy even I'm ready to give him space i hope one day he return i am now going work on myself like you said to boost my confidence at least
CollegeKid101 Posted March 4, 2017 Posted March 4, 2017 Tq collegekid for your advice .yes i really want to go on no contact with him . when i asked why he needs space he also said that he needs some alone time for him because he feel guilty that he Is cheating him and myself.its really hard for me to get over this guy even I'm ready to give him space i hope one day he return i am now going work on myself like you said to boost my confidence at least I understand..it's a really tough situation and I know it sucks. The good news is you will eventually wake up one day and not feel the way you do. You'll be happy again, I promise. Great! The sooner you start improving and focusing on yourself, the sooner you will be happy again. Good luck, Risha
Author Risha7 Posted March 4, 2017 Author Posted March 4, 2017 tq collegekid. but last year he said don't message me anymore in angry i stopped messaging him for 10 days after 10 days i left him a message he said he lost his happiness when he lost me which made me surprised but now I'm still in shock for his neediness for space
Author Risha7 Posted March 4, 2017 Author Posted March 4, 2017 my bf asked me for space and to leave him alone for while.yes i agreed and stay no contact with him for 3 days but should i block him on WhatsApp but he never block or delete my number .
kevinjinha Posted March 4, 2017 Posted March 4, 2017 tq collegekid. but last year he said don't message me anymore in angry i stopped messaging him for 10 days after 10 days i left him a message he said he lost his happiness when he lost me which made me surprised but now I'm still in shock for his neediness for space I understand that you're terrified right now of losing him. You're in shock and you're afraid that he won't come back. Right now, you are doing something that is very unhealthy. You're obsessing over him and basing your happiness off of him. You really shouldn't do that. I understand how you feel right now because I went through the same thing. The fear and anxiety, but for now, you need to do what he says. Don't contact him, the more you contact him the more he goes away. He'll think of you as "clingy" or "obsessive". Let time fly by, and we'll see what happens from there. But for now, we can't make any judgements. Good luck.
Author Risha7 Posted March 4, 2017 Author Posted March 4, 2017 I understand that you're terrified right now of losing him. You're in shock and you're afraid that he won't come back. Right now, you are doing something that is very unhealthy. You're obsessing over him and basing your happiness off of him. You really shouldn't do that. I understand how you feel right now because I went through the same thing. The fear and anxiety, but for now, you need to do what he says. Don't contact him, the more you contact him the more he goes away. He'll think of you as "clingy" or "obsessive". Let time fly by, and we'll see what happens from there. But for now, we can't make any judgements. Good luck. thank u kevinjinha but what you think should i block him in WhatsApp ? he didn't block me and didn't delete my number.since he asked to leave him alone for some time is it necessary for me to block him ?
kevinjinha Posted March 4, 2017 Posted March 4, 2017 thank u kevinjinha but what you think should i block him in WhatsApp ? he didn't block me and didn't delete my number.since he asked to leave him alone for some time is it necessary for me to block him ? No it is not necessary to block him. Why would you need to? Just wait and see what happens. It's too soon to make any assumptions, only has been 4 days yes? If it passes a week or 2 that's when you say something.
Author Risha7 Posted March 8, 2017 Author Posted March 8, 2017 Guys help me after 6 days of NC today all of sudden my bf send me "hi" from WhatsApp before i open and read it another msg come in saying 'sorry...wrongly sent".so i open and read the messaged and haven't reply him anything should i reply anything or just ignore it ?
Zahara Posted March 8, 2017 Posted March 8, 2017 Guys help me after 6 days of NC today all of sudden my bf send me "hi" from WhatsApp before i open and read it another msg come in saying 'sorry...wrongly sent".so i open and read the messaged and haven't reply him anything should i reply anything or just ignore it ? Ignore it. It means absolutely nothing.
VeveCakes Posted March 8, 2017 Posted March 8, 2017 No don't reply. Either he's lying for attention or he doesn't care and hasn't messaged you at all. If he messages you genuinely then you can reply.
Author Risha7 Posted March 8, 2017 Author Posted March 8, 2017 No don't reply. Either he's lying for attention or he doesn't care and hasn't messaged you at all. If he messages you genuinely then you can reply. Thanks all although i miss him I'm still controlling myself
d0nnivain Posted March 8, 2017 Posted March 8, 2017 You have to accept that this relationship has ended. Most relationships don't translate from high school to adulthood. Yours is another statistic. Sorry. In college 9 hours away he is discovering other people, other worlds & probably other women. Let him. You live your life & let him do as he pleases. "I need space" is basically code for I want to break up with you but I don't have the stones to say the words because I don't want to be the bad guy & hurt your feelings. The result is the same: your relationship is over. How you deal with the break up is up to you. You don't have to block him but you can't reach out for him. Begging & pleading only robs you of your dignity. He made his choice. Let him go but do so gracefully.
Telemachus Posted March 9, 2017 Posted March 9, 2017 No contact means that neither of you contacts the other. You say that you agreed to it. What you do with your apps is irrelevant, as long as you don't put something out there with the intention of him seeing it, or put out something about him with the intention of getting him to contact you about it. Three days isn't much time/space. If he's got mid-term exams to study for, he's got a sports tournament going on, or he's got a work project to get finished, and the two of you are usually very interactive, it seems reasonable to me. It's odd, if he didn't tell you why, and if you didn't ask. If he's busy with something else, he shouldn't be seeing whatsapp anyway. His phone should probably be turned off. It doesn't sound like a very good bf/gf arrangement if you discussed the time period but neither of you thought to ask or tell the reason for it.
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