Bigmess2 Posted February 28, 2017 Posted February 28, 2017 So trying not to be clingy or crazy but this dating thing is tough!! Especially when you're getting mixed signals... went on a first date a week ago Saturday and everything was great! We exchanged numbers and have talked here and there but nothing crazy at all. He expressed how he's so attracted to me and is looking forward to a second date but our conversations are so short it makes me wonder... like when we talk he says he's interested but there hasn't been much getting to know you conversation. My coworker is the one who introduced me to him and she said she didn't hear much but she said he said he had a good time and felt like he had a lot in common with me. He works a lot and I was in Mexico for 5 days but he didn't really talk to me all that much. Idk if I'm thinking too much or if he's a bad texter or what....
act00 Posted February 28, 2017 Posted February 28, 2017 I don't know. This is a tough one. It could be he's not much of a phone person or texter, and it could be that he would like to preserve the "getting to know you" conversations when you're actually together. He may not be one to discuss his personal life with peers or coworkers, and particularly to someone who knows you personally because he knows she'll spill, or he's really just really not one to get all gushy. I would think that if he really likes you, he'll extend an invitation for another date. Maybe he'll just ghost you because he's not totally interested, but of course he tells your coworker nice things because that's what people do. It's the kind thing to do. He liked you, but maybe not enough in a romantic way to pursue this further as a relationship. These things happen. One step at a time. People communicate at different levels, and it can be frustrating, but hopefully he'll come around. You may just want to put this one on the shelf, go on with your life, and if he pursues a second date, it will be a pleasant surprise.
d0nnivain Posted February 28, 2017 Posted February 28, 2017 At first I was concerned that you hadn't had a 2nd date in about 10 days. Then I realized you were away. So that explains that. You reach out to him & arrange the 2nd date. You plan it & you pay.
angel.eyes Posted February 28, 2017 Posted February 28, 2017 Having compatible communication styles is important to me. Do you want to feel as if you're in limbo the whole time you're dating him? Also, I wouldn't chase a guy who isn't initiating. 2
mushroomlol Posted February 28, 2017 Posted February 28, 2017 Just focus on yourself and not be too caught up in it. If he is interested in meeting up, he will ask. If you want to see him, also ask. I think the best way is to not take it too seriously from the beginning and give it sometime. 3
Author Bigmess2 Posted March 1, 2017 Author Posted March 1, 2017 Thank you all for your responses. So I ended up texting him on Monday and we talked for a while. He kept saying how he's looking forward to our next date and how it's going to be great and how he wants to kiss me and all this stuff but then he has yet to make plans with me and didn't speak to me yesterday... these mixed signals are so crazy!!! Like when we talk it's all about how he's interested and can't wait to see me again and then he dissapears.... i guess I'll give up and see what happens
d0nnivain Posted March 1, 2017 Posted March 1, 2017 He kept saying how he's looking forward to our next date and how it's going to be great and how he wants to kiss me and all this stuff but then he has yet to make plans with me and didn't speak to me yesterday... these mixed signals are so crazy!!! The next time he says all this stuff about want he wants to do on your second date ask him a pointed Q: Sounds good. So when do you think you'd like to get together? See if the direct approach moves things along.
kendahke Posted March 1, 2017 Posted March 1, 2017 (edited) So I ended up texting him on Monday and we talked for a while. He kept saying how he's looking forward to our next date and how it's going to be great and how he wants to kiss me and all this stuff but then he has yet to make plans with me and didn't speak to me yesterday... these mixed signals are so crazy!!! But what is his behavior conveying? Disinterest/disinterest in making time for you. He talks a good game, but that's about it. You had to text him in order to hear from him. If he was excited about the prospect of dating you, you wouldn't be in a quandary about his interest. That sounds like he's keeping you at bay, not really trying to be interested in getting to know you better. If I was that excited for a second date, I don't think that I would be letting time go past before saying something about my plans for said date. The reason he's not making plans is because he's not interested in a second date. He's just managing your expectations. Edited March 1, 2017 by kendahke
Recommended Posts