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Birthday of a new date?


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Posted

Hi there

 

I've been seeing a guy a few weeks- we've met up about 4 times and things have been going well- but it is really early days. He phones me a few times a week which I really like and I feel like we chat about allsorts.

 

I haven't seen him this week because he just got a puppy and life got a bit hectic... he's barely slept for the last week and been a bit all over the place. But he's still been calling me when he can (even at obscure times) and sent me a lot of puppy videos. Unfortunately I can't yet visit him where he lives in the week as I don't have security clearance and he's on a military base. He hoped to come see me this week with the puppy- but things didn't go as well as he hoped.

 

Anyway- he mentioned in passing he was having drinks with friends this weekend at his house (about an hour away from base he owns a house). I messaged him today saying if it was his birthday this weekend I hoped he had a good time with drinks etc. He replied that it is his birthday tomorrow but his family and old friends are visiting today for drinks.

 

I kind of hoped to get an invite- but then at the same time- logic reminded me that it is way too soon for that. But do I do anything for his birthday? I was thinking about getting him a card to give next week when I see him. But I don't know whether to get a gift etc. I don't know him well enough to get anything too good- but I also don't want to come across as not caring. I like this guy and do want things to work out.

 

Thanks for any responses ?

Posted

Much the same happened for me when I started dating my boyfriend. I got an email first thing in the morning wishing me a happy birthday. I didn't expect anything more - but I am looking forward to seeing what I get this year ;)

 

A card would be nice. Maybe next time you go out, pick up the bill or buy him a drink. But, definitely not a gift.

  • Like 1
Posted

I'd definitely get the card. I would (& have) also given a token ( < $20) consumable gift . . . some chocolates, a bottle of wine, homemade cookies etc.

 

 

If you are going to be a couple it's good to start off on a celebratory note.

  • Like 2
Posted

Same boat as you, my boyfriend asked me out not too long ago. I am cooking him dinner and maybe wine. That is it.

Posted

Regarding you not getting an invite, it seems a bit too early to introduce you to his family and friends if you've only had 4 dates. At this stage, I would be taking my time to get to know the person and to figure out if they're a good match, so he's probably enjoying the speed at which things are progressing and doesn't want to rush things.

 

I wouldn't worry too much if I were you as he sounds like he's making all the right moves given it's still early days. Perhaps suggest taking him out for a drink some time around his birthday.

 

As for what to get him, I'd say a nice card (nothing with boyfriend on) and a small gift which reflects something he is interested in so that he can see that you've thought about him. I wouldn't spend any more than £10.

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)

I met my gf just a few weeks before her birthday. We did not get to spend her birthday together because she was with her friends. She asked me not to get her anything.

 

But I didn't fall for that trick.

 

I gave her a card with nothing mushy on the cover and blank inside. I wrote inside a very simple line: I'm glad we met. I also got her a gift of a small signed mermaid print that I thought would match her decor.

 

Less than 20 bucks well-spent.

Edited by Jj66
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