taz872 Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 Right a bit of a strange one. Has anyone ever tried to fight for there ex or have they always tried nc an then never got them back
academicmoss Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 If my ex would seek therapy, I would totally fight for him. But, he walked away because he was stressed out and needed a break. Trust issues/fighting alot. Due to that I'm not contacting him because he wants to be left alone. I'm just going to stick to NC and whatever happens happens. He's reached out twice, it made me angry and I lashed out at him. He didn't reply. It's been 2 days of NC. I've cried on and off today but I will NOT reach out to him.
Nowty V Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 I've fought, got them back ... had my fingers burnt and my sanity boiled in oil. Ex's are ex's for a reason. Otherwise it would all be wonderful and you'd still be together now. I did some work on myself to find out why I pursued an already dead horse, that was enlightening and can raise some factors you may not immediately be aware of. Identify clearly what you want to do, and more importantly, why you want to do it. Good Luck 2
preraph Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 Fighting for someone who wants out is inherently disrespectful and that's why it will backfire. It's saying "I want what I want with no regard to what you want" and "I know what's best for you better than you do, so in other words I think you're stupid." 1
Been Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 like the previous poster I went NC and my ex contacted me and we got back together. This happened about 3 times and honestly it was worse each time. It was as if my ex took the time that we were apart to improve her game-the lying,cheating was there but she hid it a lot better each time. If you choose to take an ex back you have to set ground rules that you have to make clear if broken the relationship is DONE. The trick to this is once the ground rules are set you CANNOT wavier from them. And if I'm being honest if you have an ex that cheated on you its very likely that they will do it again but the SECOND time around it will be harder for you to catch because your ex usually won't make the same mistake like last time that got them caught. Not to mention it is soooo hard to TRUST them once they crossed that line. 1
bluefeather Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 This is not a random question. It is a spin-off from your other thread: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/breaks-breaking-up/613951-got-engaged-year-ago-valentines-day-just-broke-up-help#post7229353 Nor is it "a bit of a strange one." Look around this forum and you will see thread after thread of stories of people fighting for relationships and using NC. It isn't a strange one, it is completely normal and frequent. And yes to both of your questions. Have fought and have used NC.
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