Dating - What Does It Mean When He/She Only Gives Short Answers?

[KevCA31]

I belong to several dating sites as well as social clubs.

I completely understand when she doesn't respond back (text or email or phone) it means, "No."

 

There are several women who I've written to that only respond with one or two words. I ask if she is interested in meeting and she says yes but nothing comes of it. I know that a lot of men are writing to her so I assume she has no problem saying, "Not interested" or just not responding back.

 

A male friend of mine showed me texts of him writing to a woman he met on a dating site. Throughout the 6 weeks of texting back and forth, all she texted was, "No" "Yes" "Maybe" or other one or two word responses. They finally met.

 

This isn't a gender bias because I've heard women complain about the same thing with men.

 

So I'm confused when the other person responds with just one or two words. Are they interested or not? If they aren't, they should just say "not interested" or don't write back. IF they are interested, I would think they would respond with more than just one or two words.

[d0nnivain]

Some people aren't texters. Others are bad communicators. While more is preferable, I wouldn't automatically write somebody off for short answers. Meet them in person then decide.

[Larryville]

Quick example, I just met a lady who was exactly like this on a site I was on. She kept visiting my profile and on this site you can see how many times they visited. I finally sent a note and our conversation was like that brief.

I met her last week, she was amazing quiet at first but by the end of the date she was cool and much funnier than I ever imagined.

 

My normal instincts would be to ignore her, I decided to send the note because I figured what the hell, she visited a bunch so must have been interested plus I can’t lie she was hot! And looked better in person.. RARE.

 

Texting she will respond but is brief and to the point. This may be an issue with me down the road I like more communicative people, more outgoing than myself. I’m not a people person at all and if I’m with someone who is quiet and boring I lose interest quick. She in fact said during the date she is NOT a people person.

 

OP in your case, one or two word responses to me mean, being polite but talking to many dudes.

 

If you messaging a lady and you think she looks good and you want to pursue assume “many dozens” are messaging her as well, this is a competition is you message any woman you MUST ask yourself what is special about “you” why would a woman reply to you, spend any time it takes to message on YOU!?

[SwordofFlame]

In these scenarios, I usually just ask to meet up after receiving a few one word answers. If they don't agree to meet, they just weren't interested. If they do agree to meet, perhaps they're just introverted, have poor social skills, but usually not shy since they're still willing to meet you.

[smackie9]

I understand why, because people don't want someone constantly messaging them or want to spend their time texting meaningless convos. It's either set up a date or get off the pot.

[central]

It can mean many things, or nothing. However, it is often a sign that they really aren't very interested, or have someone else they're seeing while stringing you along in case that doesn't work out.

 

 

Mostly, it indicates a poor communicator. I'll give such people the benefit of the doubt until we meet (if that's reasonably soon), and see if that changes in person. I won't date a poor communicator - it creates too many problems for a relationship.

 

 

It is especially annoying when someone ignores a valid question and responds with something meaningless. I just stop communicating with them at that point.

[Erik30]

They're not interested, but probably feel bad if they ignore people or have to reject them. So they're hoping he/she will "get it," give up and stop sending messages.

Edited February 16, 2017 by Erik30

[BaileyB]

They are not really interested... just being polite.

[Shanex]

I agree that it's the gentle way to say not interested, and letting yourself go without giving you the finger or harsh words.

 

That said, making yourself sounds interesting doesn't mean you have to write out a novel as an opener. Be short and concise, with something you have a mutual interest read on her profile.

[GoldSparkz]

If she is still replying to your texts and hasn't said that she isn't interested, then plan a phone conversation with her to gauge how she feels about you. If she sounds interested, then arrange a date. She could be shy, illiterate or busy. If she wasn't interested then she wouldn't be making the effort to reply back and forth.

 

This is why I think its important to progress from texting as quickly as possible. It's difficult to get your feelings across and the other person can misconstrue something you say.