Curious1112 Posted February 14, 2017 Posted February 14, 2017 Hello all! I need someone else's point of view on this...so here it goes. I met this girl at the gym, she is 18 and I am 25. First time I met her I needed to use same machine as her, so I asked her is that ok, and she smiled and said yes. After that she was constantly smiling whenever I looked at her. At first I wasn't so attracted to her, but because gym is so small and I was a little bored I approached her and tried to make some small talk and ask some questions, but her answers were always short and kind of shy.....I couldn't maintain any convo. Second time the same thing, she smiles, answers what I ask, but same thing as first time. Third time I met her I was going home and she was just coming to train. When I was about to leave she teased me why am I going home soo soon. That time I thought I will message her on facebook, maybe she is better at some texting. Same thing....I was teasing her and joking a little, but answers were maybe one to two sentences. At this point I was *** it, not trying anymore. Than fourth time I met her, she was with her friend (female)....and it was like she opened up, teased me, touches me on arm, tickle and way more talkative. I also teased her back, with touching and all that. She than asks her friend can I go to coffee with them after training. At first I said OK I will go, but later I overheard her friend was not soo cool about it, so I made up some reason I will go next time. That evening I messeged her on facebook to give me her number so we can arrange that coffee, but she jokingly said she needs her parents permission to give me her number. I said "off course you need parents blessing, wouldn't want it anyother way" and left it at that. Next time I saw her same thing as last time teasing, touching, she comes to me to talk, even stays longer when she is over just to talk. I had enough of sitting and talking in gym and said I am going home. When I was about to leave I asked her if she wanted to grab a coffee now. She smiled and said "let me think about it" to which I replied "you want it or don't want it?" and after that she agreed. Thing is she asked me can one more friend who was training come with us, like she is scared of going alone with me. That friend couldn't go so it was just 2 of us. She seemed a little nervous on that coffe, we talked for 45 minutes and at some point she said something like her age group for dating is max 23 years old. I know she knows I am 25, and she knew that from start, because she overheard me saying it to someone in gym. I think she just want's the attention or something like that and is immature....but I like to hear your thoughts.
CptInsano Posted February 14, 2017 Posted February 14, 2017 (edited) As far as maturity is concerned the gap between 18 and 25 is huge. That would bring a substantial imbalance into a possible relationship. I would respect her concerns if she thinks the age gap is too much, all flirting aside. Edited February 14, 2017 by CptInsano 4
Author Curious1112 Posted February 14, 2017 Author Posted February 14, 2017 I think it's the age thing because she invited me to coffee with friends and later when I initiated she was somehow scared going alone with me. No problem I can respect her concern. Now I need to tell her to stop with flirting because whats the point it's going nowhere.
kendahke Posted February 14, 2017 Posted February 14, 2017 She needs her parent's permission to go out. That's where a 25 year old man should end this and look for someone who doesn't need their parent's permission to give out their phone number. 1
Author Curious1112 Posted February 14, 2017 Author Posted February 14, 2017 that was a joke....who would really ask their parents that. But no matter, I don't mean to pursue this I was just curious of her behavior.
goldway90 Posted February 14, 2017 Posted February 14, 2017 she said something like her age group for dating is max 23 years old She basically told she's not interested. You also over pursued her too much, came off as a needy person. You're curious about her behavior, well she's 18 of course she's going to flirt here and there what did you expect! 2
Author Curious1112 Posted February 14, 2017 Author Posted February 14, 2017 You also over pursued her too much, came off as a needy person. Let's say she is not interested. It's ok with me, 7 years is a little too much. But I don't think I was needy, I only reacted on some of her actions....you need to show some kind of interest, can't play it cool for 2 months and later wonder why girl friendzones you or something. And believe me that flirting wasn't that harmless, touching my biceps and legs while talking is not "little flirting" at least not to me.
goldway90 Posted February 15, 2017 Posted February 15, 2017 I approached her and tried to make some small talk and ask some questions, but her answers were always short and kind of shy.....I couldn't maintain any convo. She's wasn't responsive meaning she's wasn't really interested. Second time the same thing, she smiles, answers what I ask, but same thing as first time Same thing you're pursuing but her interest level is still low Third time I met her I was going home and she was just coming to train. When I was about to leave she teased me why am I going home soo soon. That time I thought I will message her on facebook, maybe she is better at some texting. Same thing....I was teasing her and joking a little, but answers were maybe one to two sentences Over pursuing from you despite her interest level being low again. This was a needy behavior. Than fourth time I met her, she was with her friend (female)....and it was like she opened up, teased me, touches me on arm, tickle and way more talkative. I also teased her back, with touching and all that. She than asks her friend can I go to coffee with them after training. She being playful while you read too much into it and invites you to join her with her friend for coffee, basically she already ordered a ticket for you to the friendzone. That evening I messeged her on facebook to give me her number so we can arrange that coffee, but she jokingly said she needs her parents permission to give me her number... Again you're chasing her meaning you're being needy. She mentioned her parents permission as a joke because she didn't want to flat out reject you. When I was about to leave I asked her if she wanted to grab a coffee now. She smiled and said "let me think about it" to which I replied "you want it or don't want it?" and after that she agreed. Thing is she asked me can one more friend who was training come with us, like she is scared of going alone with me "Let me think about it" means NO, but after your ultimatum she agreed and wait for it, she ask for her friend to join you ( remember the friendzone ticket?). it was just 2 of us. She seemed a little nervous on that coffee, we talked for 45 minutes and at some point she said something like her age group for dating is max 23 years old And finally she told you she's not really interested. Just because she was teasing and flirting doesn't mean you should ignore the other signs. She's 18 years old girl who enjoys the attention.
GoldSparkz Posted February 15, 2017 Posted February 15, 2017 I agree with the others, she is too young for you in age and maturity. In fact, she seems to have the maturity of a 13 year old which would make dating her uncomfortable. You even said that you wasn't that attracted to her and only approached her because you were bored. Maybe the thrill of the chase has got to you? I would walk away and find someone more age appropriate. 2
Author Curious1112 Posted February 15, 2017 Author Posted February 15, 2017 ok, thanks all for answers. Nothing here...moving on 1
kendahke Posted February 16, 2017 Posted February 16, 2017 that was a joke....who would really ask their parents that. That doesn't change a jot of what I said.
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