Jump to content

love him but cant be with him


While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

Recommended Posts

Posted

This is the most complicated situation I have gotten myself into…please help.

 

Background

We met online through a common friend. This guy is a mix of good and bad. Irresistable! He is in the same industry as me.

We have not met yet – just been texting. Late at night. When hes out he still messages. He has confessed that he really likes me, wants to get to know me better and oh boy does he flirt…he just wont stop. I have told him I find it annoying and get shy. He still does to tease me.

He is a good person. Actually cares and all. Sweet family.

 

Problem:

Girls are after him. He is a newbie DJ. So you can imagine. Even though when he is out at his gigs mixing..he messages.

I cant be with him as I will always be insecure and I might end up making his life hell. I am not ok with his profession but I also am not someone who will tell him not to do what he loves.

Problem is I think I am falling for him. But i cant start something I wont be able to finish and definately wont be happy with him. I dont like his friends either.

He says he likes me because I am different.

For me to be with him I really need him to give this all up...I hate to be like this...I want him so bad...but ...yeah...i know one should accept one the way they are...but hear me out...just put urself in my shoes.

 

What do I do?

Posted

Why haven't you met yet? All these other questions are nonstarters until you meet. Sounds like you're living an online fantasy.

  • Like 1
  • Author
Posted
Why haven't you met yet? All these other questions are nonstarters until you meet. Sounds like you're living an online fantasy.

because i am scared. he seems really adament to start a relationship and i am scared i dont if ill be able to handle the situation. therefore wanted a heds up.

Posted

This is all dust in the wind. What ever has been said or done before a real face-to-face meeting means nothing. You are scared of your own shadow, just meet him, he might be nothing like you think or he may not even like you.

  • Like 1
Posted

I wouldn't fret so much about stuff..

 

He may just be buttering you up to get inside your pants, once he's been there he could well disappear.

 

Get the lust out of the way and maybe love will develop, he will never give up his lifestyle, his friends won't let him.

Posted

If you don't like his lifestyle/friends because it makes you have jealousy, trust and insecurity issues, then you are not compatible....he's not the guy that would fit into your lifestyle....all you are doing is obsessing over him. You just have to step away, cut off contact and all these feelings will dissipate.

 

He's right you are different....which could indeed could cause conflict down the road.

Posted

I'm going to be really honest here... You might need to take a step back and look at your insecurities before you start considering getting into a serious relationship. Essentially, you don't trust a guy you've never met because of his career?

×
×
  • Create New...