Miffy Posted July 22, 2005 Posted July 22, 2005 Why is it that when I start trying NC, I spend hours checking my phone, checking emails, tagging them to check if and when, for how long they got read etc. Why is it that if OM has not contacted I feel depressed even though I am doing NC? Why do I find myself thinking of him all the time, even though when we met the last few times I thought he'd let himself go? Why do I think horrible thoughts of getting him back, thoughts of hacking into his email? Why am I going slowly mad?
SilentLucidity Posted July 22, 2005 Posted July 22, 2005 Miffy, I feel the same way. Though I realize that this is not good for me and thats what keeps me strong during my NC. Keep telling yourself over and over and over that it's toxic. I liken it to smoking, when you first stop thats all you think about is having a cigarette, then when the cravings are over you slowly start to realize just how bad it was for you. This is no different. Keep your chin up. Exericise Eat right Get plenty of rest Take up a new hobby Point is keep yourself occupied. If you're that obsessed then that isn't healthy. Turn your phone completely off. Just get yourself busy and keep that way. Eventually it will pass, it will be hard but it will pass and then you'll regain your complete life back again. Just hang in there
lynnspies1 Posted July 22, 2005 Posted July 22, 2005 Give yourself limits... such as, I will not check my mail until I spend one hour reading, working in the yard, etc. I will turn my phone off and not check my messages for one hour. Then keep extending the time until it is just once a day and then once every couple days and so on.
Miffy Posted July 22, 2005 Posted July 22, 2005 My problem is I find myself comfort eating which does not help, I should really be looking to make myself feel better not worse!
SilentLucidity Posted July 22, 2005 Posted July 22, 2005 Trading one habit for the other won't work well at all unless the other habit is healthy of course. For each time that you have a problem or a thought you could use that time to work out. I know you don't want to a lot of us hate to work out but honestly it increases endorphins and you'll feel much better. Eating too much will not only make you overweight and be unhealthy, but it will also cause you a lot of other stress. I did that for awhile and ballooned all the way up to over 200 pounds at one time, it took a long time to take it back off. I'm now at a reasonable 120 and plan to stay that way. I'm more fit than I've ever been and it's all due to taking out my frustrations on the treadmill. You'll do fine. Just keep telling yourself that and believe it.
katty Posted July 22, 2005 Posted July 22, 2005 been there, done that. It sucks. I don't even know who I get more frustrated at the man that makes me feel this way or myself for allowing it to happen. I think I have found my solution, I am going shopping for a boxing bag, one of those big ones, and a pair of gloves and then I am going to paste all of my exes pictures on it and just punch the he-- out of that bag until I fall over with exhaustion. I will let you know if it works or not. Best of luck to you. I think I might even treat myself to a big bowl of ice cream.
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