InAJam05 Posted February 5, 2017 Posted February 5, 2017 So I need help with a problem, I'm in love with two different guys guy A is my ex. We dated for about 4 months but we had feelings way before that. We broke up because I was confused, I loved Guy B amd guy A. Me and guy B are now dating. But I have thoughts about guy A and I have been going behind guy B back. I say I love you to both guys and everything but I feel more conceded to guy a. Guy A is the best I think he is perfect, funny, hot, and everything he treats me awesome, I love everything about him. Guy b he is a really jealous type, he is cute, cool, makes sure I'm okay but when I say love you he says no you don't or it doesn't seem like it and is getting annoying. Guy B is madly in love with me but I'm not that much in love with him, I care about him alot I don't want to tell him that I want a open relationship or that I really love another but guy a says he is fine with an open relationship and I'm madly in love with him. I don't know who to choose but im afraid to hurt guy b I don't want to and I don't want to hurt guy a either well thanks for reading and please tell me what you think I should do.
dumbass2 Posted February 5, 2017 Posted February 5, 2017 (edited) Tell both of them that you are not looking for a relationship right now and just prefer to date openly (which means they can to). You are not ready for a committed relationship with anyone right now. Tell them that and see who stays and who goes. If they both want to continue to see you, then at least you've been upfront and told them both where you stand. Do not be in a relationship with one and still see the other one. Stay out of a relationship and you can date both. I don't think it's going to work, but I can't tell you who to choose. Maybe you'll be able to figure that out after more time. I can tell you that it doesn't appear that you are ready for a relatioship with either of them right now. In the end though, if you don't make a firm decision and just pick one right now and be fully committed to it, you may end up with neither of them. At least one person is going to get hurt here. No way around it. All three of you could end up being hurt. Edited February 5, 2017 by dumbass2
Author InAJam05 Posted February 5, 2017 Author Posted February 5, 2017 Thanks, I will definitely think about trying that.
preraph Posted February 5, 2017 Posted February 5, 2017 Neither of them are right for you. You're exes for a reason and you don't love the new guy. Keep your options open and be honest with the new guy if you think he's investing his heart in you. Don't be cruel. You're probably just wasting time with your ex. Get over him before you date new guys. Give him a run, see if it works out, and if not, put him behind you. 1
Sweetfish Posted February 5, 2017 Posted February 5, 2017 So I need help with a problem, I'm in love with two different guys guy A is my ex. We dated for about 4 months but we had feelings way before that. We broke up because I was confused, I loved Guy B amd guy A. Me and guy B are now dating. But I have thoughts about guy A and I have been going behind guy B back. I say I love you to both guys and everything but I feel more conceded to guy a. Guy A is the best I think he is perfect, funny, hot, and everything he treats me awesome, I love everything about him. Guy b he is a really jealous type, he is cute, cool, makes sure I'm okay but when I say love you he says no you don't or it doesn't seem like it and is getting annoying. Guy B is madly in love with me but I'm not that much in love with him, I care about him alot I don't want to tell him that I want a open relationship or that I really love another but guy a says he is fine with an open relationship and I'm madly in love with him. I don't know who to choose but im afraid to hurt guy b I don't want to and I don't want to hurt guy a either well thanks for reading and please tell me what you think I should do. The fact that you can love two men at the same time.... means at any moment in any future relationship you are willing to jump ship. I suggest you start learning how to develop healthy relationships..
coolheadal Posted February 5, 2017 Posted February 5, 2017 A was your ex and now you brought in back into your life and B you don't really love him. But you have B as your backup if A is acting up again. Once you choose what to do with these two then you might loose one. Right now you can float both and if you know how to do it correctly you can get away with it. Never travel to the same hangout try to leave your area go 10 miles away. Trying to stay in the same place too often. A might bail out on you again and then you'll loose B if you act flaky around him. Sounds like your still in love with A but you don't want to loose B, but B you don't love.
Space Ritual Posted February 5, 2017 Posted February 5, 2017 So I need help with a problem, I'm in love with two different guys guy A is my ex. We dated for about 4 months but we had feelings way before that. We broke up because I was confused, I loved Guy B amd guy A. Me and guy B are now dating. But I have thoughts about guy A and I have been going behind guy B back. I say I love you to both guys and everything but I feel more conceded to guy a. Guy A is the best I think he is perfect, funny, hot, and everything he treats me awesome, I love everything about him. Guy b he is a really jealous type, he is cute, cool, makes sure I'm okay but when I say love you he says no you don't or it doesn't seem like it and is getting annoying. Guy B is madly in love with me but I'm not that much in love with him, I care about him alot I don't want to tell him that I want a open relationship or that I really love another but guy a says he is fine with an open relationship and I'm madly in love with him. I don't know who to choose but im afraid to hurt guy b I don't want to and I don't want to hurt guy a either well thanks for reading and please tell me what you think I should do. No you are not in love with 2 guys. Your story has too many holes. Open relationship? You couldn't handle one if your life depended on it. If you could, you sure as hell would not be writing into LS with a conundrum ripped right out of a Lifetime Movie of the Week script. You are a garden variety fence sitter who is more than happy to hurt somebody else if need be in order to not face any consequences. You are right now trying to dangle your leg over each side of that fence trying to figure out which side of the grass is greener. What is going to end up happening is that you are going to break your own ankle when you land. You will also look like a total fool and break someone's spirit that could have easily not been broken had you actually been adult enough to be honest with 2 guys as well as yourself in the first place. THAT is why you find yourself where you are at. Not because you are in love. The end result is that neither guy really matters that much, because as long as you have a minimum of consequence, you'll go with the one you figure will not give you as much grief about your preposterous inner conversation It really does not matter one bit which side you jump off of as you will break your ankle after the fall either way. All you are going to succeed in doing is having one guy who despises you and another guy who realizes he won't be able to trust you. And he will just be waiting for the other shoe to drop when you have a flight of fancy when you think you may like another guy down the road in a few months. A lot of people like Guy A say they are cool with having an open relationship as long as it is them that is having it and not the person they are in the relationship with. Then it becomes a little less fun. Having open relationships involve a boatload of trust, and sweetie, that is something you do not possess in any way, shape or form. I doubt either guy would trust you as far as they could throw you. So again, eventually both of them are going to end up with a less than favorable opinion of you. And really, who could blame them? That's how this will ultimately end. 1
mikeylo Posted February 5, 2017 Posted February 5, 2017 You need to be alone at the moment. Let both of them go and clear your head.
Purepony Posted February 5, 2017 Posted February 5, 2017 I ageee with hawkwind I can't wait for the follow up thread "help my life's a mess feel sorry for me :("
Miss Spider Posted February 5, 2017 Posted February 5, 2017 Not cool you're going behind new guy's back to date your ex. You should be honest with him if you love him, but sounds like you're more into your ex than new guy even though you don't want to be.
coolheadal Posted February 5, 2017 Posted February 5, 2017 This happens all the time everyone doing this, because you just can't get everything you want form one person. You need to have 1, 2, 3, or more people in your life and you just not happy with being with that one special person. In this case 2 guys with 1 woman. So all this leads to with more fun and more laughs but these two don't know what's going on, just cloak and danger life style. She will never give up both until one has it all. Even if she drops both she'll crave for the desire of them. To each their own..
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