Left me for another woman, but still stalking my social media

[Kailyanna]

I've been lurking and reading this forum religiously for the past few weeks. The posts and amazing responses are helping me get through a heartbreaking time for me! So thank you.

 

Long story short. My ex and I had been together for a year. It was mostly long distance as he travels for work. Things were fine until after thanksgiving and then he started acting strange. I kept pressing him for answers and he wouldn't admit anything was wrong other than he was homesick. He saved up his paid time off and was taking 6 weeks off to go home and visit family during the holidays. We planned a vacation at the start of that time, and he also planned a trip to Europe for after the holidays (I couldn't go along because of work commitments).

 

Once our trip was over, he started acting even stranger. His hometown is several hours from where I live, and he was being very distant. Finally after a couple weeks of me pressuring him, he finally admitted he had met someone else. But he told me I meant the world to him and he cherished me and begged me to remain his friend. I went contact and didn't respond for a week. In a weak moment I finally reached out and tried to be civil. That lasted for 2 days before I decided I couldn't remain his friend after how he had treated me. I was so good to this man. I cherished his existence and loved him more than anyone. I did everything for him. My friends, both women and men have told me I spoiled him and did too much, because he took me for granted.

 

I found out he was planning on taking the new woman on the trip to Europe that I had helped him plan. I literally just stopped responding and unfriended him on all social media. The strange thing is, from the moment I went no contact, he has stalked mine and my best friends social media. He spent his entire romantic vacation going on my profiles and liking things, liking my best friends posts and even contacted her 4 or 5 times for random reasons just trying to talk and hinting he wanted to see me. This has left me so confused. He hasn't reached out to me once but asked my best friend how I was, and said that he noticed I unfriended him the very first day and he guess that meant I didn't want to be friends.

 

I have been strictly maintaining no contact and haven't reached out, but it's all left me so confused. If he is in a new relationship and so happy and moving on, why is he so concerned with what I'm doing?? I'm hoping for some clarity and piece of mind moving forward that I'm doing the right thing. I still love him with all of my heart and I know he really didn't want me to walk away because of everything I did for him. But I'm not sure how he expects me to remain in his life when he broke my heart like this.

 

Thanks for letting me vent.

[VeveCakes]

Block him everywhere. Problem solved.

 

He is doing it so he gets an ego boost and to string you along. Breadcrumbs. Just making it harder for you to forget him.

 

If he cared, he would pick up the phone and call you.

[Ieris]

It could be a number of things..

 

01 | Curiosity

02 | Guilt - wants to know you are doing OK

03 | Trying to get your attention - knows your friend will tell you

04 | Sniffing around - so if it doesn't work with the other girl he can crawl back

 

I guess you can block him but sometimes knowing they still wonder about you can help ease the breakup a little (that's what I found any way). You carry on doing NC and work on yourself then move on to better things. If/when his other relationship breaks down, he's going to know he lost a good one (you).

[Purepony]

Move on screw this loser !!

[Kailyanna]

It could be a number of things..

 

01 | Curiosity

02 | Guilt - wants to know you are doing OK

03 | Trying to get your attention - knows your friend will tell you

04 | Sniffing around - so if it doesn't work with the other girl he can crawl back

 

I guess you can block him but sometimes knowing they still wonder about you can help ease the breakup a little (that's what I found any way). You carry on doing NC and work on yourself then move on to better things. If/when his other relationship breaks down, he's going to know he lost a good one (you).

 

I hope so. I sacrificed a lot for him. Looking back I can see how one sided it was. He does in fact know my best friend will tell me. He likes more of our social media posts than his new girlfriends. It's very bizarre. I hope someday he does realize at the very least how good I was to him.

[BC1980]

Probably curiosity and to get attention. Don't read too much into it.

[Miss Spider]

Go North Carolina. He's a cheater a-hole wondering how you are doing without him. Like a serial killer who comes back to the scene of the crime. I'm so sorry. Block him if you must but do not answer him. Do not eat his crumbs.

[dumbass2]

you haven't been in NC because of the social media. Doesn't matter if you contact him or not. He needs to be removed from all social media and you not being able to see anything he does. Then you can go strict NC and begin to heal and move forward. Until then, you will just be continued to be confused by things he does that only he can answer for sure and no one on her can.

[Bromeo]

It means nothing. Not being harsh at all. I knew my ex was stalking my page, due to messenger notifying me. And really, as social media is meant to be viewed, so who cares?

 

Social media is the king of mixed signals, and you will drive yourself into a hole as I did wondering.

 

Block them, see if they reach out. If not, then you know.

 

You'll get there. I did. I blocked mine recently and never looked back.