Popsicle Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 Married couple sleeps in separate beds (rooms). Are they having sex frequently or infrequently?
GunslingerRoland Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 Married couple sleeps in separate beds (rooms). Are they having sex frequently or infrequently? This is more common than many people realize and it doesn't necessarily affect sex frequency.
Author Popsicle Posted January 31, 2017 Author Posted January 31, 2017 This is more common than many people realize and it doesn't necessarily affect sex frequency. I have a hard time believing that. 2
thefooloftheyear Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 I think it depends.... I am sure it usually means that its all over...But think about this for a minute... I am one of those people that has a "restless mind", that runs non stop.....Unless I am absolutely dead tired I will not be able to sleep unless I have some sort of media on...Could be the TV...radio, etc...But there has to be something on to distract me, or I will just ruminate over all of the facets of what I have to get done, things I am working on...projects. etc...And ive been the same since i was a kid..Most people, id imagine want it dark and quiet.. There are also people that snore like a Grizzly, toss and turn, use the bathroom 10 times a night...etc...People adjust to these conditions....Doesn't mean they necessarily aren't intimate.. TFY
Author Popsicle Posted January 31, 2017 Author Posted January 31, 2017 I'm aware that there are countless legitimate reasons why a couple may not sleep together. That is not what I questioned or wished to discuss. My question was are they frequently having sex or not? I still think NOT. 2
GunslingerRoland Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 I'm aware that there are countless legitimate reasons why a couple may not sleep together. That is not what I questioned or wished to discuss. My question was are they frequently having sex or not? I still think NOT. Well first off, what do you consider frequently? When you say frequently or infrequently do you mean in comparison to an average couple who have been married the same amount of time who do sleep in the same bed. Secondly, there are a lot of reasons that would cause a couple to sleep in different rooms that would also directly affect a couples sex life. Severe medical reasons, marital breakdown. There are also some couples that don't have those major issues, but struggle to sleep in the same room, because of minor things like snoring/light sleeping, and I know couples like that who do have perfectly healthy sex lives. By this same theory, a couple who live in different places and don't do sleepovers must not have frequent sex either. 2
Michelle ma Belle Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 Although I wouldn't be so quick to judge or put them all in the same box, I will say that all the people I know who sleep in separate beds or even separate rooms for that matter (and there are more than you think), the romance and therefore sex is all but gone. Again, it may not be the case with all couples but it does seem to indicate that sexual intimacy isn't as high of a priority as their sleep. 1
thefooloftheyear Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 I'm aware that there are countless legitimate reasons why a couple may not sleep together. That is not what I questioned or wished to discuss. My question was are they frequently having sex or not? I still think NOT. I'll bet there are quite a few that sleep in the same bed.....yet all they do is.....sleep... You really can't draw any conclusions from that ....Not from my perspective,,,, TFY 1
JamesM Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 Married couple sleeps in separate beds (rooms). Are they having sex frequently or infrequently? Infrequently...simply by the nature of the arrangement. BTDT...and while there was a valid reason (ie illness), it certainly puts a damper on sex. However, having said that, often the actual reason is really why the sex diminishes. As an example, if I sleep on the couch because my wife is ill or has a back injury or broken foot, then we probably wouldn't have sex even if I was in the bed. So this may be a "which comes first" question in many (but not all) cases. 2
RecentChange Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 Boy.... I guess I am lucky that I am a easy sleeper (and a sound one - I do not do anything to keep my husband up). Sharing our bed - it's one of my favorite things. To be in a total state of relaxation while snuggled up to him. To see him sleeping, for him to be the first thing I see in the morning - all of this plays an important role in our intimacy - and I think intimacy is vital for a robust sex life. We can wake in the morning... Be groggy and half asleep. But ya know, he'll have morning wood, and before you know it one thing will had led to another. Spontaneity like that seems near impossible if a couple is in separate beds or rooms. What do you do? Wake up, wander down the hall, rustle them up, and say "good morning I am horny!"? For me, I think so much closeness would be lost if we couldn't sleep together. I would wear ear plugs, heck what ever I needed so that I could still sleep with him at night. 5
thefooloftheyear Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 One good Dutch Oven and you'll forget the sex and throw him/her out... TFY
GunslingerRoland Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 Boy.... I guess I am lucky that I am a easy sleeper (and a sound one - I do not do anything to keep my husband up). Sharing our bed - it's one of my favorite things. To be in a total state of relaxation while snuggled up to him. To see him sleeping, for him to be the first thing I see in the morning - all of this plays an important role in our intimacy - and I think intimacy is vital for a robust sex life. We can wake in the morning... Be groggy and half asleep. But ya know, he'll have morning wood, and before you know it one thing will had led to another. Spontaneity like that seems near impossible if a couple is in separate beds or rooms. What do you do? Wake up, wander down the hall, rustle them up, and say "good morning I am horny!"? For me, I think so much closeness would be lost if we couldn't sleep together. I would wear ear plugs, heck what ever I needed so that I could still sleep with him at night. And this is a good example of where lifestyle plays so much more in a couple's sexual frequency than the same bed factor. My wife and I sleep in the same bed but we have two early riser children. The number of times we've woken up before the kids and had sex in the last 10 years is in the low single digits.
alphamale Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 Married couple sleeps in separate beds (rooms). Are they having sex frequently or infrequently? not at all 1
RecentChange Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 :laugh:!! and don't think he is the one who wakes me up first..... It's me that points out that not all of him is asleep. And yes Gunslinger - it is all part of a lifestyle choice. Taking up separate bedrooms is not a choice that would work for me. Neither would being awaken by small children and not being able to have a spontaneous love life - one of the many reasons we choose to not have kids. On a whole, if a couple chooses separate bedrooms, I don't think they place a high priority on their sex life.
No_Go Posted January 31, 2017 Posted January 31, 2017 According to someone close to me who slept separately from her husband their entire marriage (30 years) - they had very active sex life the whole time. I love sleeping with a partner in the same bed; however with my last BF sex never happened around sleeping time. We were active daily, usually right after coming back from work, or random times on the weekends. If we were not sleeping in the same bed - we would have still had sex daily. I think there is no correlation. 1
Mrs. John Adams Posted February 1, 2017 Posted February 1, 2017 I say infrequently... My aunt and uncle slept in twin beds in the same room.....I never knew why My husband brother and his wife sleep in queen beds in separate rooms and have been for many years....she told me...no sex. 2
lana-banana Posted February 1, 2017 Posted February 1, 2017 My parents have been married 38 years and have the healthiest relationship of any couple I know. They are loving, deeply affectionate, and have great communication. They fight maybe once a year, but bicker like cats and dogs when it comes to trivial things like the fastest way to get to a restaurant. I am sure they still have sex (not that it's something I like to think about). They've also slept in separate beds for the past 10 years because my father's CPAP machine is incredibly loud. You can hear it from down the hall. They only share a bed when they're on vacation. I know couples that don't share bedrooms during the week because they're on opposite shifts. I don't think beds are indicative of anything except whether they're getting to sleep at more or less the same time. 1
aileD Posted February 1, 2017 Posted February 1, 2017 Depends . Is it a married guy who is pursuing you with sob stories about how his wife and him sleep in separate bedrooms and he's deprived sexually? Then yes, he's getting it from his wife and probably doesn't even have a guest room. Lol 2
Author Popsicle Posted February 1, 2017 Author Posted February 1, 2017 Depends . Is it a married guy who is pursuing you with sob stories about how his wife and him sleep in separate bedrooms and he's deprived sexually? Then yes, he's getting it from his wife and probably doesn't even have a guest room. Lol The answer to your question is no, so does that change your answer now?
Weezy1973 Posted February 1, 2017 Posted February 1, 2017 There's really no way to know. Not enough information. I'd withhold even guessing based on the info provided. And if you're a reasonable adult, so would you.
Jj66 Posted February 1, 2017 Posted February 1, 2017 Most of the time infrequently but there are some exceptions. 1
Shining One Posted February 1, 2017 Posted February 1, 2017 I'm with the "it depends" crowd. If they are sleeping in separate beds because of relationship issues, then yes, the sex will be infrequent. If they are sleeping in separate beds for practical reasons and the relationship is healthy, then sex will be relatively normal. 2
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