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Guy I went out on a date TWo years ago...


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Posted

Hello all,

Long story short, two years ago I went on a Tinder date with a guy who I liked a lot. I didnt have a lot of dating experience at the time (and neither did he, I think). I think we were somewhat nervous, talked a lot but I remember it being a good experience. Not sure about chemistry. Anyhow, we texted back and forth for at least a couple of weeks (even to the point of me telling via text about my other bad dates haha...)

Anyhow... I have since deleted it for reasons but on a different app, he came across my profile and took the initiative to like/message me first and said that he remembered me from years ago. We chatted, asked how we have been during this time, and he has asked me out on a date. Not sure what to make of this... He is cheerful, academic, and maybe even slightly awkward. Definitely the total opposite of a "finance bro" with ego at 200%.

Is this because he had other choices lined up the first time around?

Is this date even worth it?

Posted

if it was a good date back then and you liked him, why did you stop seeing him?

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Posted
if it was a good date back then and you liked him, why did you stop seeing him?

 

he never asked me on a second date the first time around.

he didnt really give any indication that he wanted a second. I had like minimal dating experience though back then. I think he was nervous as well. he kept texting me afterward but never asked me so I thought I was friendzoned or he was trying to be nice...

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Posted

well i think its worth a chance.maybe he has grown up now and he is different,you dont have something to lose by going i think

Posted

Yeah, why not?

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Posted
Yeah, why not?

 

Should I ask him when I see him why he didnt ask me on a second date? I feel that would be the biggest elephant in the room for me.

Posted

It's 2 years ago and it was only one date. You didnt owe each other much. It really doesn't matter what was going on back then. If he tells you, great. But I really wouldn't make a big deal out of it now. Priorities change.

Posted

I don't know...I'd probably go...nothing really bad happened, it sounds like you liked him and perhaps he liked you more than you thought, and maybe it will be fun.

  • Like 2
Posted
Should I ask him when I see him why he didnt ask me on a second date? I feel that would be the biggest elephant in the room for me.

 

Well I for one will tell you to point out that pink elephant and deal with whatever comes of it. But then again, that's just me.

 

I hate pink elephants hovering in any room so I tend to deal with them straight away if only to establish a clean slate to move on from. I know myself well enough to know that if I don't deal with a burning question or concern right away, it manifests into something bigger and often has grave outcomes. Better to shoot from the hip and set the precedence for honesty right from the get go.

 

Not getting a second date with this guy seems to be something you haven't forgotten in all this time which means it's important to you. I'd nip it in the butt and let the cards fall where they may.

 

Good luck.

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Posted

But overall, would hearing the answer make me happy?

What if he didnt ask me out bc he wasnt that interested or wasnt sure etc...

We were both in our early 20s then and maybe he has changed now..but I'm not sure what to make of this

Posted

He has asked you in a second date, it just took him 2 years to do it. Leave the elephant atvthe zoo.

Posted
But overall, would hearing the answer make me happy?

What if he didnt ask me out bc he wasnt that interested or wasnt sure etc...

We were both in our early 20s then and maybe he has changed now..but I'm not sure what to make of this

 

Honestly, only YOU can answer that. I don't think it entirely matters. As someone has stated in here earlier, two years is quite some time. Lots of things can change between then. The only way you'll find out is if you take him up on that chance. Ask him, but when you get your answer you're going to need to accept whatever he tells you and take it from there.

Posted (edited)

I think people forget that dating is supposed to be experimental and fun. It's okay to go out with people and it not work out. As long as you make it out with all your limbs and no uncurable diseases you did well.

 

Go out with him and just joke about the previous situation. The truth will come out in an un awkward way and you two can laugh it off. No need to take it personal.

Edited by a LoveShack.org Moderator
rude~T
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Posted

Okay, silly question. Date night was set for today several days ago. We were texting thru the week and I texted him yesterday how are you etc. He said he wasn't feeling too well so took the day off from work. I wished him well and asked if he would still be able to make it today if he was sick. He said, he would keep me posted and thinks he is getting better...looking forward to seeing you!

So later, I asked him where we would be meeting and he suggested BarX, and I agreed.

Haven't heard from him yet this morning. What should I do? Do I assume it is on or off until he confirms? Should I text him?

I don't think he is the flaking type.

  • Author
Posted

Thoughts anyone??? Thanks!

Posted
Thoughts anyone??? Thanks!

 

The place was set. Was there a set time? If so, if you haven't heard from him say a couple of hours before that time, shoot him a text that says "hey, see ya at BarX at Xtime. Looking forward to seeing you again."

 

If he doesn't respond by the time you have to leave, you don't reach out to him or go to the place.

Posted

I always confirm before committing any time to getting ready and especially before leaving.

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