No Contact or Friendly Letter????

[Pugwash]

Hi folks, basically I've not spoken to my ex fiancee in over 3 weeks (she rang me when I was out drinking completely out of the blue) and I hadn't spoken to her for a month previously.

 

She's in a new relationship since mid December, which is her business.

 

Basically I've been experiencing a lot of highs (being free and independent) and a lot of lows (missing her, despite breaking up with her)

 

I was at a soccer match in a near town the other day and was due to call in to say hi to her mam (we get on really well) just to see how she was, but I saw my ex's car outside her mams business so I didn't call in!

 

I still haven't gotten closure since breaking up with Sarah, also having your ex fiancee tell you she still was in love with me 3 weeks ago when I was doing ok single and had gotten over the fact she was in a new relationship, has now come full circle and I find myself wondering "what if"

 

I was going to write her a friendly letter, just to see how she was keeping (texting and phone calls are a bit meh) because after speaking to her a girl I spent the best part of 3 years with to have spoken to her twice or three in two months is something crazy!

 

I still love her very much, even when I broke up with her I was still madly in love with her. I'm not in good place since my Dad died and felt like ending it all around X-mas time but thankfully I didn't!

 

I'm not saying this letter would be to tell Sarah I want her back, I just can't believe how she rang me out of the blue and started pouring her feelings out to me 3 weeks which has knocked me for 6.

 

I'm really confused, lost etc

[d0nnivain]

Closure comes from you not her.

 

Write her the letter but do NOT send it to her. Print it out & put it in a drawer. Revisit the letter in a month. See how you feel then.

[preraph]

So she didn't say she wanted to try it again or anything? Or did you act defensive and scare her off from saying anything like that? A good demo of her good intentions would be to not be dating someone else.

 

I personally think that if you contact her, it should be a phone call to ask her out on a date. She won't be prepared for it. Just see if she accepts. At the date, you can talk about whether you're moving on or not.