giventheflick Posted January 27, 2017 Posted January 27, 2017 My ex has dumped me three times before, always out of the blue after an especially brilliant evening or fantastic few weeks together. The first time really shocked and hit me for six because she had been saying how happy she was to have found me and how I was the "perfect boyfriend" the evening before. So yes, each time she does it now it isn't shocking or a surprise...but it's still heartbreaking. The thing is, the reasons she gives for ending the relationship read like a long, irrational list. Such as I call too much, don't give her enough space, or don't like her child. I think her child is amazing and she knows this, plus I only see her at weekends so how can I not be giving her enough space? As for calling her once a day, really, that's what boyfriends and girlfriends do! Anyway, to cut to the chase in December we had an awesome few weeks. She told me that I make her so happy, that she's madly in love with me and that she couldn't bear to not have me. We always have a ton of fun together and everything is great....until her PMS hits and she pushes me away like clockwork. This happens every single month and lasts for 10 days. She thinks incredibly negatively about our relationship, brings up every previous historic disagreement we've ever had, withdraws all affection and doesn't want to see me at the weekend. It's always touch and go whether she dumps me or not and if I walk on eggshells then I'm usually ok...for a few months. Like clockwork, no matter how great the previous weeks have been, she will dump me every few months. What makes it different this time is that I've been deleted off FB and Whatsapp, plus given the silent treatment for four weeks now. She said on the day she dumped me that she doesn't trust me, brought up all the previous disagreements we've ever had (and had moved on from) and that it's definitely over this time. She also said that I make her unhappy, when two weeks earlier I'm the perfect boyfriend and I make her so happy. We've had zero arguments or disagreements in the four months since she last dumped me. So am I to think that it's definitely over this time? These dumpings are so heartbreaking, the going from amazing to fully off with the flick of a switch. What do you think is wrong here?
Redhead14 Posted January 27, 2017 Posted January 27, 2017 My ex has dumped me three times before, always out of the blue after an especially brilliant evening or fantastic few weeks together. The first time really shocked and hit me for six because she had been saying how happy she was to have found me and how I was the "perfect boyfriend" the evening before. So yes, each time she does it now it isn't shocking or a surprise...but it's still heartbreaking. The thing is, the reasons she gives for ending the relationship read like a long, irrational list. Such as I call too much, don't give her enough space, or don't like her child. I think her child is amazing and she knows this, plus I only see her at weekends so how can I not be giving her enough space? As for calling her once a day, really, that's what boyfriends and girlfriends do! Anyway, to cut to the chase in December we had an awesome few weeks. She told me that I make her so happy, that she's madly in love with me and that she couldn't bear to not have me. We always have a ton of fun together and everything is great....until her PMS hits and she pushes me away like clockwork. This happens every single month and lasts for 10 days. She thinks incredibly negatively about our relationship, brings up every previous historic disagreement we've ever had, withdraws all affection and doesn't want to see me at the weekend. It's always touch and go whether she dumps me or not and if I walk on eggshells then I'm usually ok...for a few months. Like clockwork, no matter how great the previous weeks have been, she will dump me every few months. What makes it different this time is that I've been deleted off FB and Whatsapp, plus given the silent treatment for four weeks now. She said on the day she dumped me that she doesn't trust me, brought up all the previous disagreements we've ever had (and had moved on from) and that it's definitely over this time. She also said that I make her unhappy, when two weeks earlier I'm the perfect boyfriend and I make her so happy. We've had zero arguments or disagreements in the four months since she last dumped me. So am I to think that it's definitely over this time? These dumpings are so heartbreaking, the going from amazing to fully off with the flick of a switch. What do you think is wrong here? What do you think is wrong here? -- You. You keep taking her back . . . The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results. 2
springy Posted January 27, 2017 Posted January 27, 2017 What's wrong here? You keep taking her back! 2
Author giventheflick Posted January 28, 2017 Author Posted January 28, 2017 Yeah but I was wanting to know what underlying reasons she might have for doing these complete 180 degree turns. They do seem to be hormonal and at regimented times of the month.
angel.eyes Posted January 28, 2017 Posted January 28, 2017 We've had zero arguments or disagreements in the four months since she last dumped me. So am I to think that it's definitely over this time? These dumpings are so heartbreaking, the going from amazing to fully off with the flick of a switch. What do you think is wrong here? You keep going back! That's what's wrong!!! Why are you interested in having even more dumpings?
enddeck Posted January 28, 2017 Posted January 28, 2017 Yeah but I was wanting to know what underlying reasons she might have for doing these complete 180 degree turns. They do seem to be hormonal and at regimented times of the month. She does it because she wants to see you suffer and crawl to her and you do it every time. Try growing a pair. 1
d0nnivain Posted January 28, 2017 Posted January 28, 2017 Yeah but I was wanting to know what underlying reasons she might have for doing these complete 180 degree turns. They do seem to be hormonal and at regimented times of the month. Blaming it on her menstrual cycle is not a good plan. It's also probably not accurate. That said, it doesn't matter WHY she does this. The fact remains she does this and you let her. At this point she knows she can do anything she wants, dump you, play you like a toy & you will still come back. She has no respect for you & no mature idea of how to be in a relationship. Show some respect for yourself & get off this merry-go-round. 1
Redhead14 Posted January 28, 2017 Posted January 28, 2017 My ex has dumped me three times before, always out of the blue after an especially brilliant evening or fantastic few weeks together. The first time really shocked and hit me for six because she had been saying how happy she was to have found me and how I was the "perfect boyfriend" the evening before. So yes, each time she does it now it isn't shocking or a surprise...but it's still heartbreaking. The thing is, the reasons she gives for ending the relationship read like a long, irrational list. Such as I call too much, don't give her enough space, or don't like her child. I think her child is amazing and she knows this, plus I only see her at weekends so how can I not be giving her enough space? As for calling her once a day, really, that's what boyfriends and girlfriends do! Anyway, to cut to the chase in December we had an awesome few weeks. She told me that I make her so happy, that she's madly in love with me and that she couldn't bear to not have me. We always have a ton of fun together and everything is great....until her PMS hits and she pushes me away like clockwork. This happens every single month and lasts for 10 days. She thinks incredibly negatively about our relationship, brings up every previous historic disagreement we've ever had, withdraws all affection and doesn't want to see me at the weekend. It's always touch and go whether she dumps me or not and if I walk on eggshells then I'm usually ok...for a few months. Like clockwork, no matter how great the previous weeks have been, she will dump me every few months. What makes it different this time is that I've been deleted off FB and Whatsapp, plus given the silent treatment for four weeks now. She said on the day she dumped me that she doesn't trust me, brought up all the previous disagreements we've ever had (and had moved on from) and that it's definitely over this time. She also said that I make her unhappy, when two weeks earlier I'm the perfect boyfriend and I make her so happy. We've had zero arguments or disagreements in the four months since she last dumped me. So am I to think that it's definitely over this time? These dumpings are so heartbreaking, the going from amazing to fully off with the flick of a switch. What do you think is wrong here? There are several possible psychological reasons, but the truth is, we can't know and neither can you. The important truth/fact about all this is that you are not happy and you've seen this reversal a number of times which means it's not likely going to change. Each time you take her back, I can only imagine the anxiety you much experience waiting/wondering if/when it will end again. Walking on eggshells is an awful thing. I can promise you that this is not about PMS . . . Such as I call too much, don't give her enough space, or don't like her child. I think her child is amazing and she knows this, plus I only see her at weekends so how can I not be giving her enough space? -- She just wants you to be around on HER schedule, when she's feeling needy, etc. She isn't interested in your needs. She's not bonded to you. Walk away. When someone tells me that they need space, I become NASA. The can contact Houston when/if they figure out/resolve what their problem is. If they take too long or do this even a couple of times for extended periods of time, they will find that they do not have a place to land their aircraft. If I accept them back one time, I tell them that the behavior is unacceptable to me and can't be tolerated. Then, if they do it again, I pick up the landing pad and they can never use it again. Pick up the landing pad once and for all. Find yourself a woman who is truly connected to you and wants you around. Instead of one who is Lost in Space.
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