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Posted (edited)

I'm a little confused and wanted to hear your take on things. There is a new teacher in the class I work in. I just noticed last week that he has been looking quite a lot at me, plays with the kids and wants to see my reaction afterwards...those as well as other little things I noticed that made it look like he had taken some kind of interest in me. The other day, after other staff left, we had a convo about our education and a few other things (we both have teaching degrees). He said he was "curious" about my teaching background, but he never asked until I started talking. There is a bit of an age gap, with me being older, but we both have degrees and are living on our own, so he isn't a boy to me, if you know what I mean.

 

Yesterday after work I texted him, saying how I think it would be cool for us to learn more about each other, but away from work. I mentioned how I wanted to say something to him at work, but not with the other staff around. When I arrived this morning he mentioned how he got my text and started laughing at himself and said, "Why?...I'm such a ****head. You don't want to get to know me. No". I wasn't expecting that, more like a "Sure why not?".

 

I do want to add that I'm in the process of getting over a guy I loved for 7 years, so I'm not head over heels for this one. His response took me by surprise and left me confused/bummed. Any thoughts? :confused:

Edited by birdybird7775
Posted
...When I arrived this morning he mentioned how he got my text and started laughing at himself and said, "Why?...I'm such a ****head. You don't want to get to know me. No". I wasn't expecting that, more like a "Sure why not?".

 

I do want to add that I'm in the process of getting over a guy I loved for 7 years, so I'm not head over heels for this one. His response took me by surprise and left me confused/bummed. Any thoughts? :confused:

 

His answer is no. He's not interested, so drop it, especially since you're work colleagues.

  • Like 5
Posted

Trust him when he tells you he is ****ed up....they are usually telling the truth.

Posted

Yeah - it's a rejection.

 

Honestly, one I have used. I have been approached by guys that I knew where just.... A bit too wholesome and sensitive for me. Add the fact that I really have to be into someone to be a good partner.

 

In my head I was thinking "sorry honey, I would chew you up and spit you out" So I said something along the lines of what this guy said - you don't want to get to know me.

  • Like 5
Posted

I've used the same rejection excuse. I also was laughing when I said it to take the pressure off us both. At least he's honest so you don't waste your time.

  • Like 2
Posted

Yes, what RC said...

 

I told that to a new girl I met, took her out and later had to say, "You really don't want to get involved with me, regardless of what you are thinking right now".

 

She was just too sweet, I know that she would get hurt and I am really working to not hurt people that way anymore.

  • Like 3
Posted

I have something a bit different to say compared to other folks because the same type of thing happened with my friend and the guy she is with. Notice...she is with him now. You may have taken him by surprise. Yes, it was a rejection, but if you two really don't know each other, you may get to know each other more in the future. You never know, things may change. The age difference may have something to do with it. To me, the type of response he gave is kind of immature to a certain extent. With my friend's guy, he didn't have much of a great self image when they first met. Over time she grew on him.

Posted

She was just too sweet, I know that she would get hurt and I am really working to not hurt people that way anymore.

 

Sometimes you can't judge a book by its cover. Do you know how many men were shocked at how wholesome I looked and then find out what I do in private?

 

 

OP - Yes it sounds like he was trying to let you down easy.

Posted

I think he was watching you to see how you were with the kids and maybe learn something or see what the drill is there, not because he was attracted.

 

He said no. Now you have to be polite and professional and pretend it never happened.

  • Like 2
Posted

No, he was into her...

 

When he got to know her he did not want to hurt her. I guess she is super sweet.

 

Frankly I avoid the sweet one as well. It is just not worth the drama when they figure out you are not sweet and monogamous.

Posted

It's not really that hard do deduce.

 

If his response is anything but receptive, that means no.

 

I'm not one for gray areas. Either someone is attracted to you or they're not.

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