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Have no idea how to read this situation [UPDATE should I swipe right on him?]

floralnochip

By floralnochip
in Dating

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While the thread author can add an update and reopen discussion, this thread was last posted in over a month ago. Want to continue the conversation? Feel free to start a new thread instead!

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elaine567 Established Member

elaine567

Posted
Posted
....I'm wondering why it's so difficult to let this go and just move on. At the end of the day it was only two dates but I'm just still hanging on to the "what ifs".

 

Because you saw potential in him.

YOU envisaged yourself going on dates, laughing at his jokes, being his gf, sitting in his new apartment, sharing his bed... YOU bought into the picture he painted of his life.

And now it has all come to nothing...

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  • 4 weeks later...
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floralnochip New Member

floralnochip

Posted
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Posted

So there's a guy (M31) that I(F27) went on two dates with in January. After initially coming on super strong and constantly texting me, giving compliments, making future plans, kissing and affection, etc. he began the typical slow fade-- taking days to return a text, me doing all the initiation, etc. At this point I haven't spoken to him in 3 weeks after he made a vague suggestion to get together but never followed up.

 

I don't know what my problem is, why I just can't stop thinking about him. I recently got back on Tinder and as I'm going through profiles he pops up. Instead of swiping one way or the other I just closed the app, which apparently brings the profile back around whenever you open Tinder again so you can make a decision one way or the other.

 

A little bit after our second date his profile disappeared from my matches which meant he either deleted his profile or unmatched us. But now that I'm back on after deleting my profile his keeps popping up. I don't know if Tinder keeps showing him to me because he swiped right or what.

 

Would it be totally weird to swipe right on him? I'm incredibly curious if he swiped right on me again. But at the same time, it doesn't really matter because he still hasn't texted me after 3 weeks. If we do end up matching he could have done it purely for an ego boost or whatever else.

 

Am I being weird/desperate? Or in some way giving up my power if I swipe right on him and we match? To me, I see it as possibly putting myself in the forefront of his mind again (especially because I have new pictures and they're quite cute lol). I feel like I'm about to do something impulsive. But at the same time, what if it gets the ball rolling again?

 

I just wonder if I'm being a bit silly or if it's not really that serious. Thanks!

Ronnys93 Established Member

Ronnys93

Posted
Posted

Swipe right. You know you want to... End your misery.

smackie9 Established Member

smackie9

Posted
Posted

You are being desperate for a guy that was pretty much just trying to get in your pants, but someone better came along and ditched you.

 

Beware of guys who love bomb......

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BeingBlunt Member

BeingBlunt

Posted
Posted

You two have only been on 2 dates, it's not like you are exclusive or anything. Plus moving can be an extremely stressful situation, I have been in his shoes and I did not want to deal with any sort of company until everything was settled. Also, I think the texting may have been a little overboard and it could have driven him away. Too many people rely on texting these days to talk to other people. You can't really tell his tone of the text messages so keep an open mind. Plus Tinder isn't exactly the best place to look for something long term. If you want to know why he isn't interested in setting up a third date, JUST ASK HIM. If you don't get an answer, then I guess that's it. Otherwise just move on.

PinkPampies Established Member

PinkPampies

Posted
Posted

I would never give him the satisfaction of swiping right lol!

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angel.eyes Established Member

angel.eyes

Posted
Posted

No. Just no!

 

He faded on you in round 1. Why are you basically requesting a second shot with someone who dated you, came up with flimsy excuses when you kept pushing for a third date, and then chose to ignore you when you kept chasing him? Keep your dignity and move on.

dumbass2 Established Member

dumbass2

Posted
Posted

Don't swipe him or contact him. Look, if a guy is really interested in dating you, you will know it. There will be no questioning it. He will show the interest and not go silent after 2 dates. He's not interested right now. Maybe later if things aren't working out with other dates, he might give you another shot, but my guess would be purely for sex.

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Miss Spider Established Member

Miss Spider

Posted
Posted (edited)

Yes youre being weird and desperate. And he will know that. Sorry,girl! :(This guy didn't want to put in even the slightest effort to date you. Don't swipe him. You're setting yourself up for more of the same.

Edited by Cookiesandough
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