Phonebox99 Posted January 20, 2017 Posted January 20, 2017 I'm trying to understand how I can better communicate with him. I feel resentment building in a couple of areas of our relationship and the other day I tried talking to him about how I feel like I'm making all the effort to see him (I travel over an hour each way every weekend) and I'd like to know if he still actively wants to see me, because we've fallen into this routine, but he never actually says anything which makes me feel wanted. He says this is all my insecurity and it's nothing to do with him. I partly agree but I also think he could make more effort in appreciating me verbally and acknowledging what effort I'm putting in. It really upset me because every time I calmly try and tell him what I want, he says it makes him not want to see me anymore because this kind of conversation isn't fun. I can appreciate that to him it sounds like I'm not grateful for all he already does for me. He is fantastic at texting, he is always ready and willing to help me if I need it, he's affectionate and we have a good laugh together when we see each other. However just lately I feel like I've given him so much of my time and effort and I just want reassurance that he wants this without him getting annoyed at me. Help? How can I make this easier
elaine567 Posted January 20, 2017 Posted January 20, 2017 Stop making all the effort, if he wants to see you, he can travel to visit you. YOU are too available, all he needs to do is send a few tests and be in a good mood when you show up, whilst you do all the running. The fact he dismissed your wants, makes him poor bf material. He is blackmailing you too, "If you do not do as I say, then I will stop seeing you..." Relationships are about give and take, he takes you give - not healthy. Step back and see if he makes some effort, if not then you are better off without him. 2
basil67 Posted January 20, 2017 Posted January 20, 2017 Phonebox, dating and relationships are about getting to know our partner better and discovering whether or not they are Mr/Ms Right. They aren't about sticking with someone who's not meeting our needs and trying to fix it. End it and move on. When you find the right man, you will feel loved without question. 2
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