winny Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 Men are pretty clueless about women's cycle, women's fertility, and under how many weeks is an abortion permitted, etc. If my bf sees a box of tampons in the grocery shopping he'll automatically assume I have my period even if I had it the previous week. This is not something can analyze on his own. Not all men are clueless like this to be frank... 2
winny Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 Why some men and women dont use birth control is beyond me You barely know this women and if she decides to carry the pregnancy to term the chances of you two working out long-term are slim considering your adding a child to the mix so early on I know I'm going to sound blunt but you shouldve thought of this before you had unprotected sex. Kids shouldnt be brought into the world unless they have a healthy/stable environment to grow up in As for trying to soothe her current mood...thats the least of your problems Just...ugh Wayyyy too many assumptions..!!
winny Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 I can see myself maybe reacting this way too. Maybe she isn't mature and this how she copes with stress and regret. The guy can say he's with you all the way but ultimately it's her body and her decision. He really doesn't have any reprecussions if she terminates the pregnancy....which would be the predominant thing on my mind right now had I been dating a guy a couple months and became unexpectedly pregnant by him I am sure once she cools down and is able to process the information, both of them can have an adult conversation and decide whats best for them. 2
KathL Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 I am always surprised at my age - 42, how many men (via personal stories and those of my friends) try to have sex without condoms. I am on birth control, but they don't even ask, let alone the disease factor. Because they always think they can get away with it. Obviously, the girls have more to lose than they do, so they have the luxury to take it lightly. But then again, some girls are acting irresponsibly too. 1
HelenaTroy Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 Without knowing the regularity of her cycle, when she ovulated, and when they had sex, it is impossible to know when she'd have known (or not) that she was pregnant. Sometimes, when I'm upset enough about something to be crying, I want space too. Everyone is different. He should certainly talk to her and find out the details, especially if there is any question of whether or not he is the father. Exactly. Gaeta, you have no way of knowing where this woman was in her cycle when she started dating the OP, so to claim that she couldn't possibly know she is pregnant yet "this month" is preposterous and bizarre. OP, some people do push away/isolate themselves when they are upset. I am like that to a degree. I also think, based on how you describe the conversation with your girlfriend, you gave the "wrong" answers to her questions. She asked what you wanted, and it may have sounded like she wanted to know how you felt, but my guess is that what she really wanted was for you to say something other than what you actually said. Since "I'll support you no matter what" and "I don't think you should keep the baby" didn't work, I'm guessing she wanted you to be excited about the idea of having a baby. Now, I don't think that's fair of her -- you're not a mind reader, she gave no indication that she was excited about the pregnancy and wanted you to share in her joy and, most importantly, this is a huge issue and you are entitled to say how you feel. But I wonder if that's not what happened.
Gaeta Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 I am not pretending l know her cycle. I am only extrapolating while considering they have dated only 8 weeks and women have a short period to get pregnant. That being said OP has not come back to this thead, he left us with a partial story. For all we know she was only late and panicked and didn't even get tested. She did not even told OP she had a test. If you read OP last thread you'll see he is dating an emotional woman that cries at the blink of an eye.
No_Go Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 IT very well could be his - e.g. with regular cycle see the following scenario: week 1 ovulation week 2 week 3 period week 4 week 5 ovulation & fertilization week 6 week 7 missed period week 8 telling OP about pregnancy I am not pretending l know her cycle. I am only extrapolating while considering they have dated only 8 weeks and women have a short period to get pregnant. That being said OP has not come back to this thead, he left us with a partial story. For all we know she was only late and panicked and didn't even get tested. She did not even told OP she had a test. If you read OP last thread you'll see he is dating an emotional woman that cries at the blink of an eye. 2
introverted1 Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 OP says they've been dating a little over two months. So say they started dating November 7. Her periods (assuming a perfect 28-day cycle) could have been: Nov 21 Dec 18 Jan 14 - missed That puts conception right around a drunken NYE. Of course, it's also possible he's not the father, but I don't think we can conclude that based on her menstruation schedule. 2
Tressugar Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 (edited) Just a thought every woman who menstruates, cycle is different from the next... We are are just individualistic as fingerprints. OP hasn't even seen her urinate on the pregnancy test stick. An ex made me do this in front of him then threw up right in front of me when he saw how quickly the lines appeared...lol. Have her take a test to be sure. I have heard many women sike themselves out and convince themselves they are pregnant and they're not even pregnant! Edited January 18, 2017 by Tressugar
strawberryshortstack Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 Just a thought every woman who menstruates, cycle is different from the next... We are are just individualistic as fingerprints. OP hasn't even seen her urinate on the pregnancy test stick. An ex made me do this in front of him then threw up right in front of me when he saw how quickly the lines appeared...lol. Have her take a test to be sure. I have heard many women sike themselves out and convince themselves they are pregnant and they're not even pregnant! So true! I speak from experience! I was with a guy, having unprotected sex - we were in a monogamous relationship - and my period was late. After several days, I was convinced that I was pregnant, and we made a late night trip to the drugstore for a pregnancy test. It was negative - as it should have been, since he had had a vasectomy years before. But fear isn't rational. 1
purrrfectlyflawed Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 Well didn't either of you discuss safe sex or birth control? Getting someone prego right off the bat is never good for a relationship. At this point let her know you will support whatever she decides to do. She can freak out all she wants but ultimately its her body and she didn't take precautions. She knows how babies are made. At this point be sure she is actually pregnant and make sure it is yours. If she is not further along then 2 or 3 weeks (technically 4-5 weeks the first 2 weeks is free so to speak) then she has a decision to make. Weeks start at by the very first day of her cycle. Good luck.
smackie9 Posted January 18, 2017 Posted January 18, 2017 Oh well it is what it is...there's nothing you can do now but wait for her to figure out what she wants to do. I believe your relationship is good as dead. These traumatic type situations usually spoil the mood real fast.
Rouik Posted January 19, 2017 Posted January 19, 2017 Life for you guys is about to change alot, but it doesnt have to be looked at as a bad thing. First off i think you are doing the right thing by being there for her, you are right to say you are a team and it will take both of you to be on the same page for the baby. I wont tell you its going to be easy being a parent and i hope you guys can stay together and raise your child but if your relationship with your girlfriend does'nt continue you still have to be a father. Your world from here on will revolve around raising a child and it is a very big honor and responsibilty, but i can tell you as a father myself it is one of the biggest blessings in my life. Good luck and congratulations to you and your girlfriend.
basil67 Posted January 19, 2017 Posted January 19, 2017 morning sickness phase of the pregnancy... which doesn't occur until the 7th or 8th week of pregnancy. Just for the sake of accuracy.... Our bodies aren't all the same. I've had three pregnancies and for each one, my morning sickness started only two or three days after I was late.
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