thecrucible Posted January 16, 2017 Posted January 16, 2017 What have your experiences been with blind date set ups? Don't get me wrong, I really appreciate when people are trying to help but these kind of set ups have always gone wrong for me. I was recommended this guy by a friend but he actually turned out to be kind of sleazy and I wasn't comfortable in his company so I dumped him after three dates. There was another guy I started going out with but when he asked me about being his gf, I went into panic mode. I wasn't sure I'd want to date a guy with kids (he didn't live with them and his ex was in the picture so I thought it would be a bit of drama I didn't want to handle). Then another guy was recommended to me and we went out with him for several dates but there just wasn't enough chemistry and I couldn't make it work. The thing in common with all these situations is that I don't know in the grand scheme of things, whether they were really trying to help me or trying to help those guys. Some friends are cool if it hasn't worked out but others kind of had a go at me because I didn't end up dating those guys long-term. But I did what felt best for me. The blind dates also feel awkward for me because I automatically feel pressure for a fairy tale romance to emerge. I don't mind meeting men through friends in a less formalized way (like you meet in the group but there's no official introduction or blind date). I've had boyfriends I've met through friends before. A work colleague is trying to set me up with a man but I don't know how this is going to work for me. I've met the guy and like him as a person but aren't really entertaining the notion of dating him. I mean it hasn't crossed my mind but I know a nerd lady like me is going to find dating real hard. I honestly kind of want to cry about how badly it is going at the moment. Loveshack daters, what are your experiences of date set ups?
Mjm1014 Posted January 16, 2017 Posted January 16, 2017 Haha yeah they don't usually work well for me either, except 9/10 times it's my cousins/family members that try setting me up, and I almost always feel pressure to give it more of a chance than I want to so there's no drama from either side. I honestly dislike being set up in general because of all the connections, people talk, especially if the dates don't go well, and I just hate the gossip surrounding that. I try to stay away from set ups if possible but that's just my take on things..if, we meet at a party or something I feel like there is still a lot less pressure than people actually trying to set you up if you catch my drift. Maybe I've just had bad luck because most of the people they try setting me up with I'm not attracted to in the least and to them it comes off as shallow-but I can't help who I'm attracted to or not lol
Ronnys93 Posted January 16, 2017 Posted January 16, 2017 I had one "friend" who introduced me to her best friend. We actually did end up liking each other, but my "friend" would feel like she had control of the relationship as if it was hers. Did some weird control freak kind of things, and some serious mind games on both of us. It was ridiculous. Bad experience for me, I'd go out on a date just for the heck of it blind or not, but my expectations aren't very high after that experience lol. Me and the guy she set me up with are no longer friends with her, and while we're friends with each other, we don't plan on dating.
CaliforniaGirl Posted January 16, 2017 Posted January 16, 2017 One worked out for some time, two didn't.
smackie9 Posted January 16, 2017 Posted January 16, 2017 Next time someone says "Hey I know this guy that would be....." Communicate, don't let them push you around. Tell them: - you would be alright with meeting him at a dinner party or something casual. -don't get high expectations. -don't get insulted if you end up not liking the guy. -if things don't work out, don't take it personally, leave it alone. I feel if you lay it out to these matchmakers, it will take the pressure off, and stop you feeling obligated to keep dating someone that is "creepy". 1
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