Ali Lea Posted January 13, 2017 Posted January 13, 2017 I dated my ex for nearly three years and knew him eleven years prior. We shared vehicles, bought a home together, and had a blended family. The relationship was not that great though. There was constant arguing, lying, deceiving, and a need for dominance. I was made to leave several times through out the years. Finally, the last time I was done and I did not come back. Since the break up he has made things even worse. He has done everything from constant calls, texts, and drive-byes to harassing my friends and family. Things got so bad that a protective order had to be put in place and he is facing other criminal charges along with it. Unfortunately, I cannot just cut ties because we have a lifelong connection... our child together. It has been four months since the break up and things have started to calm down. I cannot stop thinking about him though. My heart is filled with hatred and anger toward him and all he has done, but as time has gone on my feelings have yet to dissolve. Sometimes it feels like my life is falling apart, things seemed much easier with him. Today has been the worst day so far because, today, I found out that he is back with his ex. This is not just any ex either! This is the ex he always talked about. The one he compared me to; the one he called an "upgrade" compared to me. He allowed this ex to move into OUR home once during one of our break ups, and now she is there again. This was supposed to be OUR home! She is also the mother of the other child. Even though their relationship lasted less than a year, he has true feelings for her. I do not understand why I am feeling this way. I wanted this break up and I still do. I cannot help but feel completely crushed. I suppose I had hoped he would find a way to fix things. How can I move on from this?
Miss Clavel Posted January 13, 2017 Posted January 13, 2017 drop the baggage, let go, move on. in that order. 1
CommittedToThis Posted January 13, 2017 Posted January 13, 2017 (edited) Hi OP, Have you looked into the possibility your ex may suffer from a Cluster B personality disorder? Based on your story it sounds like a possibility based on what I've experienced. Learning about disorders and why I allowed someone possibly suffering from one to abuse me for 10 years is my primary life lesson. I can safely say I will never find myself in that situation again, and I truly hope at the end of your particular struggle, you can say it, too. It's not you, it's them. Hang in there. Edited January 13, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 1
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