frecklefox2017 Posted January 11, 2017 Posted January 11, 2017 i have been dating this guy for about 4 months. we both lead busy lives so we catch up once or twice a week. when we are together we talk for hours, go out for dinner, do fun stuff and we stay over at each others houses. he always asks me to stay. he bought me a gift for Christmas which i thought was very thoughtful and surprising. he went and visited his family over the holidays and was away for 2 weeks. i pretty much left him alone and i asked at one point when was he coming back? he replied and finished his text with a do you miss me? i replied with a maybe yes. he came home that night and we saw each other. my problem is is that he isn't much of a communicator to say the least. unless i actually text he won't make the effort to do it to me. he claim he is lazy when it comes to messaging. i know its just a text but it bothers me. I'm guessing i am overreacting and shouldn't let it get to me. am i a booty call? why would he buy me a gift? why would he stay all night or ask me to stay at his house? i think I'm ready to let him go.. i would appreciate some straight answers as to whether or not i am wasting my time here. thanks in advance
JennaDT Posted January 11, 2017 Posted January 11, 2017 I could have written this post myself. I was also dating a guy for about the same amount of time and we also had a lot of fun when we were together (also just once or twice a week because we were both busy) and he also always asked me to stay over. He also bought me expensive jewelry for Christmas and then spent two weeks with his family abroad for Christmas. Before he left, he even asked me to come with him to his home country a few months later, so I thought all was well. But then while he was away, I barely heard from him (unless I texted him). When he came back, he confessed to me (in tears) that he still loved his ex-wife and that he really wanted things to work out between us because he really liked me. But as long as his ex-wife was still in his heart, he was not emotionally available to love me. Once I saw things more clearly, I noticed that I had been making a lot of excuses for him and his behavior. "Maybe he doesn't text me because he's busy, or because he has nothing to say, or because he doesn't want to disturb me,..." But the truth is that if a guy really wants you, he'll make an effort in staying in touch. My ex hardly ever did that and it made me constantly question if he was still interested. Maybe your guy is different, but I would really trust your gut here. Maybe he's dealing with something similar as my ex. I don't think my ex used me for sex and I do believe he really wanted things to work out when we started dating, but he was just not capable of loving anyone but his ex-wife yet. So just be careful to not get your heart broken. Maybe you can just tell him that you want to hear from him more (regular phone calls maybe if he doesn't like texting). If he really wants to be with you, he'll make an effort. And if he doesn't, good riddance :-). Take care!
Gaeta Posted January 11, 2017 Posted January 11, 2017 A lot of men enjoy the presence of a body in their bed through the night and will invite fwb or ONS to stay the night. Same with the gifts, they don't make much efforts all year long but at xmas or your birthday they will shed a little money on you. How long exactly have you been dating?
mikeylo Posted January 11, 2017 Posted January 11, 2017 If you meet only once or twice a week and sleepover , apart from little talking here and there -- you don't need to think any further.
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