Mrlonelyone Posted January 25, 2017 Posted January 25, 2017 She also told me that she would never ever lie to me and i told her that she was talking to her bf before and knew him before we broke up and she said no I didn't. I had know idea who he was. And she sent me all of there conversations when they first started talking with the time stamps and dates.and said she would never lie to me about anything. Why would she do that? I am now working on me. and healing. I just wanted your thoughts. As everything she just told me is completely different from when we first broke up. A few reasons for this last thing. A lot of people want their ex's to think of them as basically good post break up even if they cheated. Maybe she did cheat, maybe she didn't, maybe she used a different messenger system to talk to him who knows these days. On some level she may harbor some type of feelings. Love, evidently not, but she may respect and value you above most other people. So she cares what you think of her for that reason. It is possible to stop loving someone and still think very highly of them. She may be doing this to keep the door open a crack unless things don't work out. Trust is very big in relationships. There is a line of reasoning that says you don't really know someone until they break up with you. When they no longer are trying to be nice and are just being real. She may on some level want to be able to come back if things don't work out. If you still have some basic level of trust...proven by those messages...that would be a real reason to consider a second chance if you feel like it. The bottom line is for this to work out for the best no matter what is for you to be as strong as possible and maintain NC as much as you can. She did all the leaving so let her do all the walking back.
Author Austin6010 Posted January 25, 2017 Author Posted January 25, 2017 I understand that. I do get that she could have some how been talking to him or knew if him. If she wanted me out of her life so badly though why wouldn't she tell me she cheated? That would make me never want her. At the same cost I got most of the answers I needed. but at the same time it also made me ask my self more questions. like why would she jump right back in a relationship with someone she doesn't know and now thinks the world of? Why would you want to start talking to a stranger on Facebook? Why would you ask your 2 week old bf to come move your stuff from your exs. Why aren't they going out drinking togrther thats all they both do anymore. Why would she blame it on me to start and now says its her. She told me I was the reason she wasn't happy to start. Now says it wasn't. She told me shes happier with him then me but then said he isn't the reason she is happy now. She told me she started falling out of love with me 2 months ago. But then said she just woke up one day and realised I wasn't the one she wanted anymore. Those are the questions I keep asking myself. But I'm giving myself the worst possible out come so I can learn to cope with the worst. I'm slowing getting better. I know it'll take time and I know I won't ever get the answers I want. I may never get the truth and I have to live with that. In the back of my mind. I want to think she is going out of her way to tell me about her self. Because she cares and wants me to know but at the same time maybe she doesn't want me she is just being nice. If I was her new bf I'd be pissed she kept talking to her ex. She has always wanted to be chased and told me that she chased me for too long and that's why she was done. So maybe that's why she is with him because he is chasing her but Idk. Time will tell. I want to hope she will come back but I know that it's a long shot. She has never went back to an ex expect me once before. I don't think she will realise what we had until I'm truly over her. If she ever does. She just doesn't usually make an rash decisions she usually thinks on them for a very long time but now all she is doing is making rash decisions. My biggest fear with nc is that she will forget about me. I'm doing nc or lc as best I can. I'm not going out of my way for any reason to talk to her. She always starts the conversation. Almost all of the conversations are about her getting her things. Now that they are gone. I doubt I'll hear from her and I can go complete nc. I guess we will see what happens and I will let everyone know in thr end.
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