selinaluv Posted January 9, 2017 Posted January 9, 2017 Don't let her know where you live first off. And if I were you I would do a google search and a criminal background check to see if there had been any restraining orders against her. Next have a more firm conversation about boundaries and expectations. Me personally would run for the hills lol. This! I had a friend who met a woman like this. I witnessed her paying for his meals, buying him gifts, etc. She never even gave him a chance to breathe and reciprocate. When he wanted to pull she would entice him with NBA playoff tickets, etc. He should have said no, but she made it hard... Fast forward to him now with a restraining order against her and what we could connect to her drilling a hole in his gas tank one night. She is definitely going above and beyond in this situation and it is a sign if it makes you uneasy. 1
preraph Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 One thing I can tell you is she's in love with love and she is projecting on to you the "perfect guy" she has in her head, so the longer you know her, the more she'll realize you are not that same guy -- no one is. But meanwhile, your gut instinct is telling you she's really obsessive -- and you're right. Obsessive people who are pushing on you to this degree, giving you gifts you've done nothing to earn, after just meeting you, that's not healthy -- and where it will lead is her being enraged and resentful because this did not make you reciprocate in kind. People who give too much too soon, it's just a manipulation in hopes they can force you to accelerate the whole process and get in deep because they start out in deep since they're in love with an ideal and not the real person.
preraph Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 Just saw your post about her background of violence. I'm just going to give you the odds on that. It is far, far more common that the person being broken up with against their will shoots the one breaking up with them than it is for the person who wants the break up to shoot the one they are done with. A huge percentage of crimes against women are men who are taking back control by harming them. It's rare with women, but it does happen. If I were you, I would call the records clerk and pay for a copy of the police reports or court transcripts.
ElizabethIII Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 an assault charge against a dude with whom she broke up with who kept coming to her house… she shot at dude -- I dont believe her. I bet she was the one chasing him. Run away. Tell you dont want to see her anymore and buy a bullet proof vest. I hope your address isnt listed. 2
Lansing Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 Yikes, One girl I dated was too interested too soon. It made me really hesitant because I was wondering if she was into me or just the idea of me and who else she got to that point with after a few dates. She had a lot of anxiety about the relationship and I felt like she was giving me compliments/etc because she wanted to hear it back herself. After I read something about Borderline Personality Disorder and I was shocked how many boxes she checked off. Not diagnosing your current date but suggest maybe looking into that as it sounds like it might fit the bill for her. Regardless, I think you have good reason to be hesitant. I would be very careful in your shoes. 2
Sweetfish Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 So when is this going to be on the lifetime channel. 1
fireflywy Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 (edited) To the OP If you have Hulu watch "Man Seeking Woman" and the episode called "Dram'. (The whole series is hilarious actually. It's all metaphorical in an over the top way but you get it.) The main guy starts dating a woman a little too hung up on him and has to find a way to end it. Now for seriousness... I'd bail. She doesn't sound even keeled. Edited January 10, 2017 by fireflywy 1
GemmaUK Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 Thinking about this what struck me is that she is showing early signs of the behaviour that she claims her previous partner/s had. Having dated previous possessive/controlling types the signs are all there. Distance sometimes down't make much difference to this type of behaviour - in fact the behaviour has been worse from those guys who I dated long distance at 2-3 hours drive away. Just be careful and remember not to make excuses for things. If it feels OTT to you that's because it's OTT.
Popsicle Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 It sounds like you are not into this girl but she is into you. Unfortunate, but it does happen. Do not lead her on or hope that your feelings will grow. You should know by now that they don't and it only hurts her. The earlier you set her free the better for you both. Be brave and honest.
Popsicle Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 We need more info about the shooting. I'm not against self defense but this sounds questionable if she was even charged.
foxgener Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 Yes that's true. That makes her crazy and you should run. I bet he won't though! Probably because he knows the crazier the woman, the more mind-blowing wild awesome the sex. The things guys do for great sex... I mean this lady is straight out of a Lifetime psycho-ex girlfriend movie and OP appears to be still considering. Hilarious! Get the pop corn! 2
Popsicle Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 Probably because he knows the crazier the woman, the more mind-blowing wild awesome the sex. The things guys do for great sex... I mean this lady is straight out of a Lifetime psycho-ex girlfriend movie and OP appears to be still considering. Hilarious! Get the pop corn! I don't know about sex. I don't get the feeling that he's all that sexually or physically attracted to her. Only like a little. He likes the attention though it's just uncomfortable. About the shooting, I don't give my address to dudes either but I wouldnt shoot someone until they were physically threatening me. (Never mind that I don't have a gun) What about a restraining order? She's clearly aggressive. But hey, this is what guys want right?
Popsicle Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 I would LOVE to receive a teddy bear in my office. But only from an attractive guy.
Gaeta Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 There is a saying that men love crazies.....but not you Larry, right? You know this is insane and it won't end well. She has a few bolts missing and I am sure all of her exs can attest to it. I did come across a men that were obsessed from the start. Even if I asked them to slow down and warned them they were ruining it with their attention, walls of text, overwhelming compliments, they never tone it down. They can't. 1
elaine567 Posted January 10, 2017 Posted January 10, 2017 I guess she is smokin' hot. And she is love bombing you. 1
Author Larryville Posted January 10, 2017 Author Posted January 10, 2017 I appreciate the feedback everyone, and E thanks for the article.
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