justitia2005 Posted July 18, 2005 Posted July 18, 2005 Hi, I am in a very confusing stage (at least to me) of a break up. I was with my bf for about four months in a LD relationship. When we moved to the same city, the problems started surfacing. I found him very different from what I thought, being negative, self-centered, and hurtful. However, he does not see that his behaviors were pushing me away. When he gets mad, he claims those hurtful things he says are love. I acknowledge the lack of good communication skills between the two of us, but I can not make everything all the sudden better if he is unwilling to see his part of the problems! I believe he lacks introspection and will not change. As conflicts went on, he initiated and agreed to a take a break. I know he did not like it, but knowing it was the only thing I would go for, he's got too much pride in him to have me leave him first. We've been on NC for almost three months now. He contacted me several times, each time just sort of lightly tested the water and disappeared again. This last time, he was more open and said he would like to talk in a couple of days. Well, it's been more than a month now, and I haven't heard anything from him. My questions are, am I obligated to contact him and give him closure? Will he hate me otherwise? Or it is pretty much understood that we are no longer together?
katty Posted July 19, 2005 Posted July 19, 2005 I think it all depends on how you are feeling. If you know that you are finished and you have not heard from him, why open up healing wounds. It might give him false hope or cause him to start contacting you again. If it is over than leaving it alone is best. Just my opinion. Hope it helps.
Zaira Posted July 19, 2005 Posted July 19, 2005 You're not obligated to give him anything but if you think it will make him leave you alone it may be worth it.
Author justitia2005 Posted July 19, 2005 Author Posted July 19, 2005 So you think he is playing a mind game with me? Who is the dumper in our break up?
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