mmx Posted January 6, 2017 Posted January 6, 2017 I have been with my boyfriend for about 6 months. In the beginning, we would make plans to hangout and then he would end up making plans with friends, but would invite me. Then it seemed to get better. (Most of my friends have moved away, but I am making more.) He almost always invited me when he had friends over. This weekend I asked him what he was doing and he stated he was going to be busy both days. I haven’t seen him since last weekend. Shouldn’t he try to find time for me even if its a few hours? Am I over reacting or being needy?
basil67 Posted January 6, 2017 Posted January 6, 2017 I wouldn't be OK with it. Though I find it interesting you asked him what he was doing on the weekend. At six months in, I'd be asking "so, what can we do on the weekend?" (To clarify, the decision would include ideas from both of us - not putting it all on him) Is there not a standing assumption that the two of you would see each other? 3
Author mmx Posted January 6, 2017 Author Posted January 6, 2017 I didn't ask what he was doing. I asked if he wanted to do something that I wanted to do. I don't even know what to do about it? 1
basil67 Posted January 6, 2017 Posted January 6, 2017 I didn't ask what he was doing. I asked if he wanted to do something that I wanted to do. I don't even know what to do about it? Talk with him. Something like "I know you want to spend time with your friends and that's OK. I also would like if we see each other for a bit on the weekend too" I would caution you though that he may have one foot out the door. These aren't the actions of a man who's really into you. 3
preraph Posted January 6, 2017 Posted January 6, 2017 Well, worst-case scenario isn't even that he has one foot out the door. Worst-case scenario, which I've seen in many bad marriages, is you put up with him not putting you first and not sharing what he's doing and planning ahead with you and letting you know when he needs some time with friends and then because you are so easy, he marries you and you subject yourself to a lifetime of waiting while he does whatever he wants to do. If you are serious, you need to look at this through the eyes of someone who has a couple of toddlers to care for and needs someone they can depend on who wants to fully invest.
Gaeta Posted January 6, 2017 Posted January 6, 2017 Hon, I know you think you are dating this guy and this for at least 5-6 months but you are not. I read your history. You spend only a couple of hours together on weekends, he does not contact you during week days. Now he's cutting those couple of hours you usually have on weekends. That is not dating. This is a guy that has a fwb on call. Nothing more. You need to end this and find yourself a real boyfriend. 3
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