Dolores88 Posted December 30, 2016 Posted December 30, 2016 My friend introduce me to this guy who is 10 years older then me. She said that he is nice, funny and as he said, looking for a life partner. He lives in another state, but due to work, travels to my city very often. At the beginning we were texting each other and made a deal him to call me when he is coming in my city. He called, I was working in my restaurant and since I couldn’t go out with him at that period of the day, we decided him to come to my work. He came, we talked for a couple of hours (I was working in meantime) and he left to catch his flight. After one week, he came again and ask me out for a dinner. We went in one bar/restaurant and he was super relaxed, acting very nicely like a real gentlemen, ordering bottle of wine, talking nicely with the server and stuffs like that. We had a really good time, getting to know each other. Nothing happened, he drove me back home and made a deal to see each other again when he is coming in my city. In the next couple of months, he came 3 or 4 time and we were going out for a dinner in nice restaurants, having fun and talking for 3-4 hours nonstop. Meanwhile, we were texting, but like Hi, how are you, how is your day… once I mentioned that I really need a vacation and I need to consider having some, he replied, come with me in Hawaii next month, be my guest. I was speechless, I said I would love to, but let’s not exaggerate. He was like, ok, but if you change your mind, the offer is still open. After all the dinners we had, drinks at some bar and again just driving me back home. I noticed that he is acting little flirty, I was acting flirty as well, but nobody took the move. The last time we went out, one week ago, we went for a drinks, again spent 3-4 hours together, and at the end of the night, he kissed me and it was very nice. We stayed in the bar for a couple of hours, kissing and hugging, he drove me back home and that’s it. We didn’t talk anything. Meanwhile, before the kissing night, we were texting and I mentioned how tired I am and that I need a vacation. He replied: Come with me in Hawaii next month, be my guest. I replied: Good for you that you are going. I would love to, but let's not exaggerate. He replied, ok, the offer is still open if you change your mind. I said, thank you. During the kissing night, he smiled and couple of times told me, why don't you come with me in Hawaii, I was just laughing and said, stop joking me with me, and he said again with jokes, noo I am not joking. Then I changed the subject. After the kissing night, 3 days later I texted him, that I was really surprised that he kissed me, he asked me was it good or bad and I said very good but I just didn't expect it. He just smiled and said I am glad you liked it. One day later, at 2am, I got a text message, have you changed your mind about coming in Hawaii? I didn't reply since I was sleeping and the next day I said how about we see each other these days? He said, I am really busy with work these days. I replied ok, I am really confused about your offer for Hawaii, I really thought you are joking. What do you say if I come to your city and spend couple of hours together? Believe it or not, he just replied, "I am joking, how serious you are lol". I was left speechless, just replied, haha ok, and that's it. What is wrong with him? Talking me out for a dinners, acting like a real gentlemen, kissing me only not even pushing me for something more, asking me for Hawaii (which I really thought he was joking, but still when someone mentions it 4 times, you would start thinking that he is serious). and then at the end,sorry I was joking. Please help, I don't understand.
IfonlyIknew Posted December 30, 2016 Posted December 30, 2016 umm yeah he either was serious and then filled that slot with someone else or he is all talk, I wouldn't waste my time.
GunslingerRoland Posted December 30, 2016 Posted December 30, 2016 Very strange... he's giving you extremely mixed messages. Is it wrong, for you to ask him if it's going anywhere because you don't want to waste your time?
smackie9 Posted December 30, 2016 Posted December 30, 2016 it's obvious he wants the bang you....why else would he ask you to go on a trip with him? Is he looking to be serious? MMMM maybe, but from where I am sitting, he is not.
Author Dolores88 Posted December 30, 2016 Author Posted December 30, 2016 I guess you guys are right, he was just spending time with me when he was around waiting for his flight or just having 10 years younger girl sitting next to him. I really thought according to his age and how mature he seemed to be, he would act differently. I thought that if his intention was just to bang me or whatever, he would try to do that at the first place, not taking me out for dinners and not texting around in meantime, discussing politics and making "smart" conversations, asking about what my plans are in the future, giving me advice how to achieve this or that etc. That's why I got all the mixed signals.. I am sure he will call or text next time he is coming to my city, but I am not sure If I should go out or not. Or maybe if I go out, if he tries to kiss me or something, to refuse and to ask whether this is one more of his jokes, since I am not really familiar with this type of having fun and making jokes...
Mangue Posted December 30, 2016 Posted December 30, 2016 Maybe he was serious with you but as you rejected his invitation, and finally even tell him that you though it was a joke, he though that you aren't really interested by him and decided to stop to invest himself. 1
VeveCakes Posted December 30, 2016 Posted December 30, 2016 I think he backed off because you declined so many times and he didn't want to look like an idiot. I think the offer was genuine. 1
VeveCakes Posted December 30, 2016 Posted December 30, 2016 am sure he will call or text next time he is coming to my city, but I am not sure If I should go out or not. Or maybe if I go out, if he tries to kiss me or something, to refuse and to ask whether this is one more of his jokes, since I am not really familiar with this type of having fun and making jokes... Yeah don't do that... that would be really immature and petty.
Author Dolores88 Posted December 30, 2016 Author Posted December 30, 2016 I think he backed off because you declined so many times and he didn't want to look like an idiot. I think the offer was genuine. In what way do you think that the offer was genuine? I didn't even consider it as normal since we don't even know each other that well, we haven't even kissed since he mentioned this trip to Hawaii? How come he expected me to come with him on some kind of a trip and we were only having dinners until then. I really don't understand what he was trying to say with this offer or he was really just joking around with me.
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