Broncorn Posted December 29, 2016 Posted December 29, 2016 I met a guy in early Oct...emailed then met. (both in early/mid 50s) We had much in common but he had a girlfriend. He pursued me immensely!! Besides 100s of texts and emails... Dates were... Dinner, drinks, lunch on his yacht, lunch, coffee, chatting at his house, drinks at his house) Every time I would say "you are committed" he would offer a new action that would eventually separate them and ask for my patience as he untangled things. For the last "date" of drinks at his house in mid-Nov, I was trying to opt out but he was majorly insistent (begging) _- "I am so into you" etc. I knew he was spending T-day with GF and his daughter away. I showed up eventually where we talked -- he promised me the end of GF, the moon, and a few other things. That was Wed. Thurs text said due to remoteness, no communication means nothing. Sunday morning I receive a text photo of his GF -- now his fiancee as the ring was the prominent focus! No text. Seriously?!? My response was "Congratulations! Best wishes to the bride to be!" and other pleasantries in text interspersed with his texted promises to me. I haven't heard a peep for about a month. Guy friends were "He will contact you" They bet drinks!! One week ago, I got a "Merry Christmas" of sorts email on the email I used with him (only 5 others have ever had it). To not reveal - I am Bird Watcher and the new email responding is Making Bird Happy. "Wishing you and your family a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. God Bless" A day later (the 24th) I responded "thank you" The response on the 26th was "So were you naughty? Or nice?" My response later in the day was "That's subjective. Who is asking?" The next day answer (7:30 a.m.) was "Who would you like to be asking? :-)" I did not answer.... and at 4:30 p.m the next day got "where is bird watcher?" All the IPs are through CA as is Yahoo but one... it is 20 miles from my home. Is this the "engaged guy" trying to make contact? This is just juvenile and weird!! Plus a wee bit scary! Any thoughts????
Redhead14 Posted December 29, 2016 Posted December 29, 2016 I met a guy in early Oct...emailed then met. (both in early/mid 50s) We had much in common but he had a girlfriend. He pursued me immensely!! Besides 100s of texts and emails... Dates were... Dinner, drinks, lunch on his yacht, lunch, coffee, chatting at his house, drinks at his house) Every time I would say "you are committed" he would offer a new action that would eventually separate them and ask for my patience as he untangled things. For the last "date" of drinks at his house in mid-Nov, I was trying to opt out but he was majorly insistent (begging) _- "I am so into you" etc. I knew he was spending T-day with GF and his daughter away. I showed up eventually where we talked -- he promised me the end of GF, the moon, and a few other things. That was Wed. Thurs text said due to remoteness, no communication means nothing. Sunday morning I receive a text photo of his GF -- now his fiancee as the ring was the prominent focus! No text. Seriously?!? My response was "Congratulations! Best wishes to the bride to be!" and other pleasantries in text interspersed with his texted promises to me. I haven't heard a peep for about a month. Guy friends were "He will contact you" They bet drinks!! One week ago, I got a "Merry Christmas" of sorts email on the email I used with him (only 5 others have ever had it). To not reveal - I am Bird Watcher and the new email responding is Making Bird Happy. "Wishing you and your family a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. God Bless" A day later (the 24th) I responded "thank you" The response on the 26th was "So were you naughty? Or nice?" My response later in the day was "That's subjective. Who is asking?" The next day answer (7:30 a.m.) was "Who would you like to be asking? :-)" I did not answer.... and at 4:30 p.m the next day got "where is bird watcher?" All the IPs are through CA as is Yahoo but one... it is 20 miles from my home. Is this the "engaged guy" trying to make contact? This is just juvenile and weird!! Plus a wee bit scary! Any thoughts???? Not strange -- just a guy who was trying to set you up as a side piece . . . 2
Author Broncorn Posted December 29, 2016 Author Posted December 29, 2016 I appreciate the insight........ tho he risked being seen as an ASS (I am a widow and he and my husband worked in the same very tight world) Plus... he promised to sell his yacht, ditch the GF and be with me Or NOT!
Author Broncorn Posted December 29, 2016 Author Posted December 29, 2016 Tho... he had skin in the game!!!!!!!!! I could forward all to his 3 year GF! I had guy friends who saw the pic and knew the story.... the bride should not be as happy as she or feel good about all!
Author Broncorn Posted December 29, 2016 Author Posted December 29, 2016 Plus... dude is an idiot!!!!!!!!!! if he will ever visit my 12" of space... plus 24 guys who would permit it (military)!!!!! He just totally sucks... if ever I have to respond I thought "It is between and your God... plus your fiancee if relevenant"!
Author Broncorn Posted December 29, 2016 Author Posted December 29, 2016 Angry threats ... not me. A=Sad thougth as the "lovely bride" (guy friends term who also called the wronged" .... I am just the blonde green eyed youngster who once danced in public cuz he insisted. 1
SunnyWeather Posted December 29, 2016 Posted December 29, 2016 why are you continuing to engage with him?
Author Broncorn Posted December 29, 2016 Author Posted December 29, 2016 Angry threats ... not me. A=Sad thougth as the "lovely bride" (guy friends term who also called the wronged" .... I am just the blonde green eyed youngster who once danced in public cuz he insisted. HE WANTS ME>\
Author Broncorn Posted December 29, 2016 Author Posted December 29, 2016 this guy pursued me for 72 plus days.... I have the texts.. ... He knew he was not in my league (especially militaryy).... but kept at it as he undoubtedly thought he deserves such.. NO..>>>>>>>
preraph Posted December 29, 2016 Posted December 29, 2016 He knew you had reached the crossroads where he had to make a decision. He was hoping you never reached that point, of course, because what he wants is more than one woman. So what he did is he came clean and now he's seeing if you're game to continue an affair with him even though you now know he's engaged, which he probably was all along. He knew you would probably be out the door soon anyway, so he's just seeing if there's any chance you will go for being his second girlfriend. 1
Author Broncorn Posted December 30, 2016 Author Posted December 30, 2016 I knew he had a GF all along and that their lives were quite intertwined. Every time I ever tried to break away, he would make new promises. I guess him me a pic could be coming clean (with no words). I know that he got engaged 3-4 days after he saw me last (when he begged to see me) as his GF and now fiancee posted pic with her ring on FB (different than the pic of her he sent me). Could he be that dense or egotistical to think I would be a GF on the side after he basically lied to me about a future but no doubt had already purchased her engagement ring? There is nothing that he could say to be back in my life. I just think if he is the guy who created a new email addy this is beyond strange.
Author Broncorn Posted December 30, 2016 Author Posted December 30, 2016 In regards to engaging, I was not sure who the first email was from. I just said thanks to the Merry Christmas then after a response email I asked who was emailing. To me, if this is him ... creating a new email to write to me is so juvenile and weird. He has my cell # and main email address. After he texted me the pic of GF showing off ring, I never heard anything. I guess I need to FB block him (we were never 'friends').
LuvMyDogMore Posted December 31, 2016 Posted December 31, 2016 Is it just me or is the fact that he texted a picture of his girlfriend with her new diamond ring completely sick? I guess it just strikes home because my ex recently got drunk and texted me a picture of his date, asking if she was "cute enough?" It made me want to vomit because he knew how badly that would hurt. I would HIGHLY recommend blocking him from phone, email [if possible] and definitely social media...next thing you know, he's going to email you a link of a video of his entire wedding! Or post it on FB. The picture text is just wrong.
Author Broncorn Posted January 4, 2017 Author Posted January 4, 2017 Well... he actually texted twice... same pic. I find it sick and am sorry to hear that you LuvMyDogMore had a similar experience though at least drunk might have been better than stone cold sober on a Sunday morning. Then say nothing for a month. Although, I am guessing that whatever had him dating a few months ago with a GF hasn't improved with the now fiancee. Additionally sick... creating a new email and not IDing himself. The dude's response to my asking who this was ... "That depends on whether or not you want a lover and best friend, NSA...." All who commented above were correct!! Then he sent "What are you interested in then? What makes those eyes sparkle?" I don't respond then get "I bet they are green eyes too! :-)" Those words confirmed any question in my mind who this was. I just cannot fathom the audacity of someone who lies to me for hours, texts me lots the next day, gets engaged 48 hours later, and then thinks he can show up a month later for some NSA nonsense. Either he thinks way too little of me or way too much of himself or both. As for blocking, he has my home, cell, work email and personal email. He only tried the personal (which I use infrequently) with this new ID (I was wracking my brain as there could have been others). He is DO NOT ANSWER in my phone. Email is somewhat problematic. Social media is funny. After I first looked at his FB page month ago, he hid all his friends (we have several in common). I already knew who the GF was (deduction). He blocked me before the New Year (can't see his comments anymore) -- I thought turning over a new leaf/resolution but texts followed. The human (especially male) mind and behavior baffle me!
Author Broncorn Posted January 7, 2017 Author Posted January 7, 2017 ---After not answering his email on Tuesday about what I want, he sent another email on Friday saying "Best wishes to you! Stay warm :)"; we had snow in the forecast. )I found the "best wishes" irritating as that is what I sent to him for the bride to be.) He has still not identified himself on that email address and is under the impression I don't check my email often. 30 minutes later he texted me on my cell saying "Happy New Year! I hope you are well..." (This is the first contact he has made there since he texted me the pic of his GF with her engagement ring prominently displayed before Thanksgiving. My last contact with him was that same day except for curt answers to the unknown email address.) The nice thing about the text ...I have him listed as "DO NOT ANSWER", I put that number on silent so I wouldn't be alerted, and I turned off read receipts. I saw it an hour after he sent it... he has no idea if I got it. ---Not responding is not easy because there are some choice words I would like to share. Right now, I am just having to enjoy the fact that I think my NC is bothering him.
spiderowl Posted January 7, 2017 Posted January 7, 2017 The guy is a serial cheater. His current fiancee will have to suffer that. Do you want to be the other woman while he philanders his way through all his female friends? It is nice to have all that attention but consider what kind of guy is giving you that attention.
Author Broncorn Posted January 8, 2017 Author Posted January 8, 2017 Spiderowl.... I am not signing up for any of his BS. I am not going to be second to anyone!! I have had my fill of this dud(e) As I said to a guy friend when this happened (pic text of GF with ring), he was not the be all, end all guy -- guy friend said... "so you aren't upset because he isn;t yours, but upset because he crapped all over you." Pretty much that is it. He pushed for an exclusive relationship (tho he got to keep the GF until he could untangle things) In November I was upset because (after I insisted I wanted a casual relationship and he pushed for long-term etc.) he basically promised me the world and said he would end things with the GF...and then proposed to her 72 hours later. There was NC after the day I received that pic text. --- I am just amazed at the audacity of him to contact me more than a month later under an unknown email address then proceed eventually to ask if I was interested in a NSA relationship. Obviously he did not hear me for almost two months! Nor is he a good judge of character.
Author Broncorn Posted January 8, 2017 Author Posted January 8, 2017 My guy friends did say... the happy bride to be really shouldn't be happy... she doesn't know what she is getting. Of course, these guys also found her rather unattractive.
Author Broncorn Posted January 8, 2017 Author Posted January 8, 2017 I am going to use this thread as another opportunity to vent... Hindsight is amazing. For some reason, today I was thinking about weddings then realized the last time I saw this guy, he discussed his brother's first and second wedding. He had a family rift with the first wedding. For the second, the bride and groom were well into their 40s both marrying for the second time. He talked of how the bride acted like it was the first time... lots of fuss etc and asked my opinion. Princess wedding only once HMMMM.... since he got engaged 72 hours later, I guess weddings were on his mind.
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