Addison Posted July 17, 2005 Posted July 17, 2005 It has been 3 weeks today. Three very long, lonely weeks. We broke up the day after getting back from a vacation in Hawaii. Needless to say I was devastated. He said that he just thought we weren't getting along that well anymore and that I didn't like his family. This is totally not true but there was no arguing with him once he had made up his mind that day. We still haven't spoken on the phone and it's so hard. I was occassionally sending him txt msgs because something would happen that I couldn't bare not to share with him. He usually just didn't respond at all, sometimes he would give me one word responses. It only made me feel worse. Then last Wednesday he actually sent me a txt first, asking about a job interview I was suppose to have had (to move to the town where he lives) and then he became interested in what all I had done last weekend (our first weekend apart). I responded without much detail and I haven't heard from him since. This NC stuff is a lot of work. Everyone keeps pressuring me to call him to see if we can work things out but I'm afraid that it would only make me feel worse to be rejected again. He said he needed some time to think about things so I don't want to throw myself at him and push him even farther away. He is currently spending 24/7 with his best friend and according to reports from my best friend, staying quite drunk. She says that he doesn't go out, he and his friend just stay at the apartment and drink. At this time he is home for the summer (he's still in college) working and in about 2 more weeks he will return to his apartment 3 hrs away. I feel like once he goes back to school and is alone at his apt and doesn't have his best friend there to take his mind off of this (all of his friends graduated and moved away this last school year) maybe he will be able to really think about this. His best friend was jealous that we dated for so long and they didn't get to spend as much time together. (His best friend doesn't really date so I feel like he encouraged this in some way.) The really sad thing about this is that my ex didn't do anything wrong. I'm the one that screwed this relationship up. Any arguments that we had were because I started them. For the entire time that we dated he didn't do even one thing wrong to me. He treated me like a princess and I underestimated him. I didn't think that he would really leave me (suprise!). I know that makes me sound like such a horrible person. I love him so much and I really thought that this was going to be the one. I still believe that he is. I just need to figure out how to prove to him that I am worthy of a second chance... that I do appreciate him. Because I know he still loves me, he's just disappointed and frustrated right now. I have handled this all suprisingly well. I took some time off work to fall apart with some dignity but compared to previous experiences, I'm proud of how well I've held it together. I think it's because this time I truly know that there is still hope for us. It's just so hard waiting... and trying to know what to do... I just don't know how to fix this... *sigh*
Author Addison Posted July 17, 2005 Author Posted July 17, 2005 I'm replying to my own msg. How pathetic is that? I just wanted to correct my time frame that I had written earlier. It has actually only been 2 weeks today and I am going into the 3rd week. Not that it makes a ton of difference but hey, I've got a lot of time on my hands these days. Plus when I'm posting nonsense msgs on here, I'm not sending him txt msgs. If anyone has any advice or opinions I'm open to them. Thanks!
Naive Posted July 17, 2005 Posted July 17, 2005 Originally posted by Addison I'm replying to my own msg. How pathetic is that? I just wanted to correct my time frame that I had written earlier. It has actually only been 2 weeks today and I am going into the 3rd week. Not that it makes a ton of difference but hey, I've got a lot of time on my hands these days. Plus when I'm posting nonsense msgs on here, I'm not sending him txt msgs. If anyone has any advice or opinions I'm open to them. Thanks! You are on the right track! Make yourself busy and you definitely will not have time to call or text him. By the way, you have my nieces name I had never heard the name on anyone else, I guess she is not alone
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