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Handle first rejection


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Posted

Hey, im 23 years old male and I knew a girl for quite some time (same age as mine) from college. We were studying together a lot and I really liked her.

 

I asked her out with me and we went for like 3 times. On the third and last one.. It just collapsed.

 

We had a good time and I had a great feeling.. so great, that I though "enough with those games.. I just should tell her" so I told her that I like her, and if she would like to take it to the next level (I told it nicely and casually and didn't make a big deal out of it).

 

She seems little bit suprised, then she said "I'm sorry, I'm not looking for a relationship right now.. I was offended by the last guy I was out with so I prefer to keep distance from it at this time".

 

It was a gently way for her to say "no" ? Do I have any hope left she might change her mind one day ?

Posted

I'm 21 and also in college. From a girl's perspective, I'd say maybe, but I'd play it cool for now on. She already was surprised by your saying that, and honestly, three dates is a little too soon to make something exclusive anyway. Hang out with her as friends, keep your options open, and maybe, she'll come around. Best of luck.

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Posted
I'm 21 and also in college. From a girl's perspective, I'd say maybe, but I'd play it cool for now on. She already was surprised by your saying that, and honestly, three dates is a little too soon to make something exclusive anyway. Hang out with her as friends, keep your options open, and maybe, she'll come around. Best of luck.

 

We know each other for a very long time.. I'm pretty sure it's about asking it too late rather then too soon.

 

I feel horrible and upset about this.. Should I behave like nothing happen ? Like I never told her anything ?

Posted
We know each other for a very long time.. I'm pretty sure it's about asking it too late rather then too soon.

 

I feel horrible and upset about this.. Should I behave like nothing happen ? Like I never told her anything ?

 

You were open and honest with her and she reciprocated with the same. That would put you both in the "wise beyond your years" category, particularly at your age. I would just keep in casually keep in touch with her and see what happens. You didn't do anything wrong. In fact, I would say you did exactly what you should have: you went out a few times, you told her that you're into her and went from there. It shows confidence that many women will respect.

Posted
We know each other for a very long time.. I'm pretty sure it's about asking it too late rather then too soon.

 

I feel horrible and upset about this.. Should I behave like nothing happen ? Like I never told her anything ?

 

Don't say anything to her and act like nothing happened.

Don't wait..

Posted

You say you went out with her three times - did you ever actually make a move on her?

 

If not, well, you shot yourself in the foot. Show, don't tell.

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