winny Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 But, he said he'd call on the 26th and hasn't. This shows his level of interest. Girl, I have done this in past... when guy said he would call n didnt, i have texted him. Never works. You dont have anything to lose though. If he answers... just have sex... and dont give it much importance. If he doesn't dont send any more messsages... to f*ck with him!!! 1
Author ja123 Posted December 28, 2016 Author Posted December 28, 2016 He just messaged me: I've just gotten back from visiting friends from grade school, they were my first friends in Canada over 34 yrs ago. It was quite a retrospective visit. You want to met up for a coffee now you would have to come and get me as I didn't rent a car for my visit. So, I said: Oh dear, I've been drinking wine. I'm afraid I'd be over the limit. I'm so glad to hear you had such a retrospective visit with your friends. That sounds wonderful! This is the truth, he's far and I have been drinking. But, you're right Winny. His interest level isn't there. He saw my message 6 minutes ago, and I'm waiting for another response for, maybe, tomorrow.
winny Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 He just messaged me: So, I said: This is the truth, he's far and I have been drinking. But, you're right Winny. His interest level isn't there. He saw my message 6 minutes ago, and I'm waiting for another response for, maybe, tomorrow. From his answer it seems like he wants to keep it platonic... he didn't mention anything about the hotel room and all that you said, no flirting etc and coffee... didn't say dinner or drinks... and he totally avoided answering your question about meeting tomorrow. 1
whichwayisup Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 He just messaged me: So, I said: This is the truth, he's far and I have been drinking. But, you're right Winny. His interest level isn't there. He saw my message 6 minutes ago, and I'm waiting for another response for, maybe, tomorrow. He isn't interested, certainly didn't respond in a flirty way, just mentioned coffee. If he replies back, don't be the one to ask to get together at another time. If he wants to he'll ask you. 1
preraph Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 I did this very same thing except he was the guy I called my "old flame" because we weren't bf/gf, but then it was the '70s and most of us were freewheelers. Went out with him after having not seen him for 25 or so years. It was GREAT. But of course it didn't last. Actually 9/11 seems to be what made him move on and quit dallying long distance. It was thrilling though. I always carried a torch for this guy, and although that reunion didn't last long, I am content calling him my "last enigma." 1
thefooloftheyear Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 To each their own, but who the hell wants to relive shyt from 30 years ago??.,..Most of the cute and perky girls I was with back then look like a couple of miles of bad road now anyway.... Eh, go for it, if that floats your boat... TFY 1
Author ja123 Posted December 28, 2016 Author Posted December 28, 2016 So here's the rest of our convo: He says: I gathered that may have been the case from the frisky tone of your message. I say: Ah haha It wasn't only the booze, darling, believe me! But, yes, my message was, indeed, frisky. I hope you feel more flattery than offense! He says: I should hope you know me better than that. Only the 'booze' my bottom! Lol I would have liked to catch up/ connect with you but I may be back in the summer if you are around. I say: Haha, not a problem. Feel free to give me a shout when you're in town again. It would be a pleasure to catch up. He says: I think you dodged me this time... were you nervous of meeting up with me? I say: Not at all! I was awaiting your call, yesterday. He says: I was here for too short a time... too many family obligations. I'm going to the hospital tomorrow to see one uncle and then to the graveyard to see another, followed by grandmother's and then home to pack. I say: I understand. I hope your uncle will be okay! It happens that I love stories and, who knows, it might have been a good one after 27 years. Please don't take that as any form of disespect, I realize you have important family business to take care of. He says: Our timing was poor, I assure you I too like a good story and have some small skill at spinning a good yarn. It will have to wait till August alas as I don't want to rush our time together. One should savour a good story and someone's company like a fine wine. I say: Well, dear Sir, you have a date! He says: See you then! I say: Cheers! 'Till then! So what do you all think?
Author ja123 Posted December 28, 2016 Author Posted December 28, 2016 He isn't interested, certainly didn't respond in a flirty way, just mentioned coffee. If he replies back, don't be the one to ask to get together at another time. If he wants to he'll ask you. He asks, as per above, but delays 'till August. Is it just me, or he doesn't sound that interested?
Author ja123 Posted December 28, 2016 Author Posted December 28, 2016 This shows his level of interest. Girl, I have done this in past... when guy said he would call n didnt, i have texted him. Never works. You dont have anything to lose though. If he answers... just have sex... and dont give it much importance. If he doesn't dont send any more messsages... to f*ck with him!!! I guess, it's move on time. Unless, I want to wait 'till August.
Author ja123 Posted December 28, 2016 Author Posted December 28, 2016 I did this very same thing except he was the guy I called my "old flame" because we weren't bf/gf, but then it was the '70s and most of us were freewheelers. Went out with him after having not seen him for 25 or so years. It was GREAT. But of course it didn't last. Actually 9/11 seems to be what made him move on and quit dallying long distance. It was thrilling though. I always carried a torch for this guy, and although that reunion didn't last long, I am content calling him my "last enigma." I was actually interested in seeing him as the fact that it would be brief would heighten the experience. I'm glad to hear that you found it thrilling and that it seems you solved your "last enigma". 1
thefooloftheyear Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 He asks, as per above, but delays 'till August. Is it just me, or he doesn't sound that interested? You probably came on too strong.... Believe it or not, some men don't want a "lay down"...(no pun intended)... or He may not have been interested.....So he stalled it, and by that time maybe it will just go away, without telling you he's not into you and hurting your feelings.. or It was just logistics, as he said... I rank the probability of each scenario from top to bottom.... TFY 1
winny Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 Why??? You are making yourself too available and he is playing hard to get. Go date other men. No waiting till August. 1
Author ja123 Posted December 28, 2016 Author Posted December 28, 2016 Also, I'm wondering whether anyone has any thoughts on his character ... - he didn't call me yesterday - he could've called me tonight, but chose to stay with FB - maybe he felt guilty because he gave a song and dance about visiting hospitals and graveyards - said "our" timing was poor, actually it was his timing AND - suggested it was the booze that made me so frisky - suggested I might be relieved in not having to meet him, as I was too nervous What do you all think? He's supposed to be more educated than I am, in judging by the writing, who's the better writer, in your opinion?
winny Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 You probably came on too strong.... Believe it or not, some men don't want a "lay down"...(no pun intended)... or He may not have been interested.....So he stalled it, and by that time maybe it will just go away, without telling you he's not into you and hurting your feelings.. or It was just logistics, as he said... I rank the probability of each scenario from top to bottom.... TFY I think it was the first or second. And did you see he never answered if he is single!!! I think he never intended to have sex... he was just looking to catch up and he didn't want to offend her so all these excuses about meeting relatives etc. 2
Author ja123 Posted December 28, 2016 Author Posted December 28, 2016 You probably came on too strong.... Believe it or not, some men don't want a "lay down"...(no pun intended)... or He may not have been interested.....So he stalled it, and by that time maybe it will just go away, without telling you he's not into you and hurting your feelings.. or It was just logistics, as he said... I rank the probability of each scenario from top to bottom.... TFY Interesting point of view, TFY, I needed a man's perspective. He's blaming it on the booze for my being so bold, but that isn't the case. Perhaps, as you say, he doesn't want to lay down in the face of a sexually aggressive woman. I have a feeling that option 2 is what will happen. He'll just hope I'll go away. Which quite frankly, I'll do. I won't be contacting him again or liking his FB posts which are few anyway. 1
winny Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 Also, I'm wondering whether anyone has any thoughts on his character ... - he didn't call me yesterday - he could've called me tonight, but chose to stay with FB - maybe he felt guilty because he gave a song and dance about visiting hospitals and graveyards - said "our" timing was poor, actually it was his timing AND - suggested it was the booze that made me so frisky - suggested I might be relieved in not having to meet him, as I was too nervous What do you all think? He's supposed to be more educated than I am, in judging by the writing, who's the better writer, in your opinion? He never apologized for not calling. 1
amaysngrace Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 How are you so sure? Because August isn't that far away and from how he sounded he wants to have more time together than he'd be able to give this time. I don't know why you're getting a different vibe because to me it sounds like a date! 2
Author ja123 Posted December 28, 2016 Author Posted December 28, 2016 Why??? You are making yourself too available and he is playing hard to get. Go date other men. No waiting till August. Yes, yes, I will and HAVE started dating other men. I really just thought this could've been a special moment. I feel discounted, in that I've gone on to have had a very full and interesting life in my own right, even though he may have rubbed elbows with celebs. I can't believe he would suggest that it was "I" who "dodged a bullet", I think he was projecting. I think it was the first or second. And did you see he never answered if he is single!!! I think he never intended to have sex... he was just looking to catch up and he didn't want to offend her so all these excuses about meeting relatives etc. At first, I think it was logistics ... but then he DID offer for me to come pick him up but only for a coffee. But, it's TRUE, he never answered if he was single. He's either a player or too embarrassed to admit he is single. But, yes, I think he just wanted to catch up with a coffee. He never intended to have sex. Although if you look at how our contact started, it was over the discussion of sex and death. I said I'm up for discussing that, and THAT'S when he said he was in town and suggested to meet.
Author ja123 Posted December 28, 2016 Author Posted December 28, 2016 Because August isn't that far away and from how he sounded he wants to have more time together than he'd be able to give this time. I don't know why you're getting a different vibe because to me it sounds like a date! I hope so, but for some reason I have a sour taste in my mouth now.
whichwayisup Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 You also don't know if he has a girlfriend or is married. He never answered your question if he was single. One would think if he was and was totally interested and available he'd let you know. I think he's amused by you but isn't emotionally invested. Live your life, don't think ahead to August. Life happens and plans change so just because he says he'll contact you then doesn't mean he actually will follow through. 2
Author ja123 Posted December 28, 2016 Author Posted December 28, 2016 He never apologized for not calling. You're right! So, he's still as egotistical as he was when he was young and promiscuous, as said.
amaysngrace Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 I hope so, but for some reason I have a sour taste in my mouth now. I'm not sure why. He ran out of time but said when he will be home again. Sounds pretty legit to me but you should keep on doing your thing. If it's meant to happen it will. 1
winny Posted December 28, 2016 Posted December 28, 2016 You're right! So, he's still as egotistical as he was when he was young and promiscuous, as said. I told you these kind of men tend to be selfish and insecure. You don't want all this drama for some sex. Seriously... I would totally ignore him going forward. 1
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