Austinhat Posted December 21, 2016 Posted December 21, 2016 So this has happened to me twice, situations where I'm talking to/dating a girl and her ex finds out she's with me or has moved on and tries to make things work with her again or tries to get back together with her and she goes right back to him. I'm a good guy, I've treated these last two women with respect and I'm good to them. They even admitted that they don't meet good guys like me and that I'm rare. I'm good looking I have a good head on my shoulders, I have a good career, I take care of myself, I'm in great shape, I have goals and aspirations in life, I'm well groomed, I'm a gentleman, I'm respectful, I manage money very well, I volunteer at the children's hospital every other week, and even though this isn't as important I know I'm good in bed (I know this is a big factor in some relationships)... don't get me wrong, I am by no means saying that I'm the perfect guy and I'm not cocky but I have enough confidence in myself to know that I am a good catch. The first girl this happened with got back with her ex for 3 months and ended up breaking up with him only to contact me and beg me to give her another chance and she lives 8 hours away! (Didn't get back together with her because I don't deserve to be someone's second option) This second girl got back together with a guy who cheated on her multiple times triggering severe depression and anxiety to the point where she had to seek counseling. Both women I talked to for about 3-5 months(average) and things were beginning to get a little serious (meeting family members, talking about future plans) they were both head over heels for me. My question is... why why whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy WHYYYYYY do people get back together with people who treat them so poorly, cheat on them, cause them so much emotional pain.. especially when presented with a potentially better situation to be in or to be with someone they admit is better than they've ever been with???? I don't get it!! 1
TheWhittler Posted December 21, 2016 Posted December 21, 2016 When you have been with someone who drains away any shred of confidence or respect you ever had for yourself it can be really difficult to cope with being treated well. Sounds to me as though you have a bit of "white knight" going on... Trick is to learn how to avoid women like this because you will panic them and they will run away. Learn how to find "undamaged" women or women who have put their baggage away. 2
Satu Posted December 21, 2016 Posted December 21, 2016 It's very obvious that you were a rebound. Don't get into a relationship with anyone who still has their head full of their ex. Take care. 1
SaltAndLight Posted December 22, 2016 Posted December 22, 2016 Oh the chances we take in love!! What you have to understand is that a person cant will their heart to change.. sounds like, despite the negative in their previous relationships, they loved those men. you came along at a time when they were hurt and looking for something to ease that pain. However, their hearts hadn't changed towards the ex's. Love or stupidity (whichever word is best accurate in each case) takes time to get over.. most matters of the heart do... It would be best if you sought after someone that is not still dealing with the pain of the past.
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